A
female
age
36-40,
*iny187
writes: I was at a club with a guy friend. We kissed a few times. But there's a problem I was going out with someone at the time and he so happens to be a the same night club as me. He saw me kissing him. Now the guy that was my boyfriend says to me that he needs some time. But he never said that he doesn't want to talk to me. Do I still have a fighting chance? If I do, what should I do to get him to love me again?
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2010): This is childish and immature of you. If you were my lady, youd be gone in a second. No hesitation whatsoever.
He'll need space to think and re evaluate the relationship. Dont call, text, or email. Have some integrity and be prudent in letting this man make his decision.
A
female
reader, Dizzy_Disaster +, writes (15 September 2010):
i think you should let him know how sorry you are and that you really regret what you did. He might not be able to trust again straight away and you will have to respect that. You will just need to let him know how commited you are to him. hope i have helped :)
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (15 September 2010):
"What should I do to get him to love me again?"
You're hilarious. There is never anything you can do to get someone to love you. They either do or they don't, but you can't control someone else's emotions.
You cheated on him. The fact that you don't see that as a problem tells me (and the others who've posted here) that you don't value your relationship and should leave it. Kissing other guys while you're in a committed relationship is not a good practice to be in. It shows a lack of respect for both your partner and your relationship.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010): I think it would be better if you broke up and were single for a while. It sounds to me like your heart just isn't in this relationship.
Why do you want him to love you again when you don't love him enough to only be with him?
You've basically destroyed all of the trust he had in you and what's worse is he saw it all happen in front of his eyes. One kiss might be explained away as a drunken mistake as few kisses is premeditated cheating.
You should just go out and have some fun, you're young and not ready to settle yet. There's nothing wrong with going out and dating guys, just don't get into a relationship again until you feel you're ready to commit.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (15 September 2010):
The problem is not him being at the club, the problem is you kissing the "guy friend". Why do you want to fight for him, if you're going to go out kissing other guys? Is that right for him? Give him the time he needs, talk to him if have the opportunity to, and if he decides to give you another chance, make sure your lips stay off of other guys. I bet if you gives you a chance and if the same thing happens again, the bridge will be burned where you will not get another one, and for good reason. He's hurt, so he'll need some time to decide what he wants to do. On your end, a sincere apology and hoping he's forgiving is where you'd stand.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (15 September 2010):
Basically, you're going to have to say goodbye to your guy friend that you kissed. More to the point, since you did kiss him, why are you in a relationship with your boyfriend? Because it doesn't sound like you're ready if you're out in the open cheating on your boyfriend. Perhaps your mind is telling you that you want to be single!
But, if your boyfriend does want you back, there is no way you can be friends with this other guy. He has to go. Then you'll have to put up with your boyfriend being very unhappy and angry for quite some time.
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