| A
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I've been dating this guy for a long time now and we're thinking about getting married one day(I only mention this because I don't want it to seem like just some little relationship). Well, I know for a fact that he still watches porn. Something i think maybe single guys should do and It really makes me feel sick, and when we're having sex I feel like I don't match up in skills or looks. Im a blonde/blue eyed girl just over 100lbs so i think im decent enough but when it comes to that i don't feel like i compare. I've told him that I don't approve of it and I also think porn is slezy. It may seem to others that I just have a problem with myself but it just makes me so depressed and I feel useless. Should I keep trying to get him to stop, or am I being too much of a girl about it? And if I should stop him, how?
View related questions:
depressed, porn Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2007): I'm in the same boat as you. I told him, I don't want to know this about him. I won't snoop, and I really have no desire to know if he is masturbating. As long as it doesn't get in the way in our relationship, and I am sexually satisfied, I really don't care. Maybe in this situation, ignorance is bliss. I like what one of the people said, "men like to look and women like to feel"
A
female
reader, isolated  +, writes (20 October 2007):
MY ex boyfriend watched porn which at the beginning of the relationship i was a tad uncomfortable with but i soon realised that i was nothing to do with what i was lacking. I joined in a often watched with him and it improved our sexual relationship and our relationship from my point of view because it was no longer something to be uncomfortable with, it sometimes became a kind of foreplay. If you feel comfortable enough try that approach and i bet he will love it. Try not to make it such a issue that he has to hide it from you because that will start problems in the relationship in itself. Im sure you would want him to be able to be open around you. If your not comfortable with that approach just try to understand that in no way does him watching porn mean your bieng compared or not good enough it is just a form of sexual stimulation or even sexual education for some. It is you who he shares the intimacy with.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2007): Talk to your bloke and let him know just how it makes you feel. Explain that you are not happy with him looking at the stuff and you would rather he stopped. If he doesnt then ask yourself if you really want to be with him or can you treat this as a trivial (i'm not saying that it is) thing and just let him get away with it. Turn a blind eye. I would like my bloke looking at it and i know he wouldnt.
take care
xx
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2007): All guys do it whether they admit it or not. It is a proven fact that guys like to see it and women like to feel it.
...............................
A
male
reader, Dextro69 +, writes (20 October 2007):
 all diffrent types of people watch porn. male and female.if you really dont like it you need to talk to your guy about it whilst it is unlikly he will stop at least try to get him to agree not to have any around the place either keep it hidden away or not in the house at all, say agree with him him can only watch it online and any files he has on his PC he password protects in a hidden away folder so you will only find then if you are snooping more than you should. also get him to agree not to talk about it again the same goes for you. if you use a history destoryer it should get rid of all traces of web sites visted including any files downloaded in the temp file folder (also helps declutter you pc as less junk on it) Please remember porn is not real both males and females are faking not one male i know has slept with a women who having as much pleasure as the women in porn films do. these women are been paid to do a job and that is to provide a fantasy they will go home at the end of the day get dressed and ask does my bum look big in this (as im sure most women have done) they are NOT perfect women in the least, most have boob jobs so large you cant hold them (whats the point?) most also go the same way as well (mouth, front, back, front, mouth end) wooppiee what fun. as you can see im not the biggest fan of porn but i do still look at it now and then just to get me going when im by myself. lots of couples also use pron as part of there sex live they act out what is on screen, if you do try this agree a sub move for anything you dont want to do beforehand
...............................
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (20 October 2007):
 We find a post like yours only every so often. So many women complain that their men watch porn, and they all feel just like you.
His watching porn doesn't have anything at all to do with you. If he is any serious, I don't believe he thinks you lose any value as compared to the women on the screen. He must know those are retouched images of women who are made to look better than they actually do. If he's about your age, maybe he is used to watching porn and finds this habit hard to break.
You don't have to feel that you must meet some "standard" for beauty. The value of a woman can't be summarized as "looks". Everybody will grow old, but who you are stays with you forever. Any smart man knows this.
Men or women, we will always come across someone who is "better" than us in a way or the other. I remember that a girlfriend of mine had a screen crush on Jean Claude Van Damme. I don't look like him :-), but I kept going.
I see you've talked to your boyfriend and he didn't stop. Try again. If this situation becomes unbearable, leave him. If not, don't think any less of you.
Hope this helps.
...............................
|
