A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:e was my girl friend 20 years ago, she went into hospital to have her womb removed because of being in a bad state, after op she got a virus that attacked her system, and disabled her, over the last 19 years i have looked after her every day and night, she needs medication every four hour and am not able to leave her because there is no one left alive in her family, all my great friend deserted me after a couple of months, i have not had a relationship with another woman in all this time and miss the closeness we used to have, now she is in so much pain all the time, doc cant give her any more meds because she is on max dose, maybe i am just feeling sorry for my self, i have no one to talk to and am starting to feel isolated all the time,i went on net hoping to join a chat room but because my machine does not have a certain devise in it wont work, and been told microsoft are doing away with this system, can any one advise me please desperate to talk to some one,sorry this is a long letter.
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male
reader, wheelchairby284  +, writes (1 April 2009):
okay man, look. I have spina bifida, now this may not be a terrible terrible disability, but i know where youre coming from and im not trying to tell you you're a selfish person. I understand that that kind of thing can leave you feeling empty inside, but think about the way she feels. every day, shes lying there vulnerable in a hospital bed while all kinds of things are happening to her, and you are the only person she has left to lean on. shes probably terrified. I've got to tell you that as a guy, wether i was disabled or not, i know that I would stay with her too, and youre doing the right thing. as her boyfriend, I believe its your job to stay with her until she sees this thing through no matter what...not because of the "poor girl with a disability" but because its the right thing to do. until then, love on her in all the ways that you can, and pray. God bless you for going through this with her bro!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2007): Dear waterloo sunset.
thank you for your message i recieve this afternoon, i cant get your private email to work keep getting transferd back to this.
Yes i feel alot better today, things do not look as bad, maybe because i have had a few hours sleep.
thank you for yor concern
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2007): Hi
If you click onto my section on the agony aunts you can mail me direct. I hope you are feeling better today. I think you are doing a marvellous job.I wish i could help more, but if it is someone to chat to that helps then chat away. I am a good listener.
take care
xx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2007): Dear waterloo sunset.
thank you for your responce and kiness to my letter, thank you for giving me the opertunety to contact you, i will not contact you to often, i think a lot of events happend close together and every thing just hit me at once, i wrote the letter in panic, not sleeped for 4 1/2 days and nights, for the first time in all these years afraid i lost my selth,it is nice to know some one out there even just to say hello,thanks for big hug.
many thank for all who responded to my letter
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2007): What a great guy you are! You have dedicated the best years of your life to your gf. So sorry to hear about your friends, but honestly if they were true friends they would still be there. Can you not get some sort of help to come in and give you a few hours off? Have you had a word with your doctor he may be able to point you in the direction to get some help. You definatly need it. I can understand the loss of closeness you must feel, how terrible, i want to hug you as i speak, but i am happily married.
I think you need to get some professional help in.
If you wanted to keep in touch, i am a good listener and i will be there for you, but at the end of a keyboard and nothing more.
Take care
xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDear Serinity
thank you for answering my letter and your kindness, and your kind word, i dont want to offend you, but i never believed in god before and now i cant find it in my heart to believe in him now, e takes a lot of medication hourly, i think i would need to hire a van to take her and her pills about, i have been to several different social services sitting places and they wont take her because they cant medicate by law in the UK, day care centers wont take her for the for the same reasons,i think the main thing that has upset me is that e as starting to talk a lot about the passed as if she is still living in the 80's, talking about all the plans we were making at that time, and it has broken my heart to see her this way, some days i cant stop crying.
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A
female
reader, Serinity +, writes (20 October 2007):
 Well, I think it's very noble of you to dedicate yourself to taking care of her. She obviously needs you very much if she doesn't have any family. I can completely understand your feelings of lonliness at the same time. Can't you have people over so you don't have to leave her alone but still have some kind of outside companionship? I'm sorry that your friends disapeard when you took on this challenge, and I hate to say it, but they must not have been that good of friends, because a true friend would not abandon you for the wonderful deed that you are doing. You should try meeting new people. People who won't judge you, people who will support you and just be there to listen. You know where you can meet people like that? Church. I'm not trying to push religion on you, but I've been through some hard times and my friends have not always been there for me either. But when I started going to church, total strangers were there to help me and support me and offer me encouraging words. Those strangers have become some of my closest friends and continue to encourage me no matter how hard life gets. Do you think you would be able to take her with you? It would be good for her as well. Lord knows she has suffered tremendously through all of this and I'm sure she could use the possitive reinforcement also. This is a great site for advice and meeting people to talk to about daily issues. As a matter of fact, feel free to send me a private message, I will be more than happy to talk to you. I know that you must be an awesome person to dedicate your life to taking care of this woman and it should not go unrecognized. God bless you always!
xx Jennifer xx
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