A
female
age
30-35,
*indingme67
writes:So there is this teacher who I have a good relationship with, and I consider him a friend since I’ve known him for about three years, but I wonder if he thinks of me more than that. Like he asked me where my “attachment” (boyfriend) was when he didn't see me with my boyfriend in the hallway. When I asked him how he knew who my boyfriend was, he just smiled and said he knows everything and then winked at me. Also, if another other girl hugs him, but I don't, he'll say that i'm too cool to hug him now that I have a boyfriend. Not to mention he notices the littlest changes in my appearance, like if I wear my glasses or contacts he’ll then compliment me about my glasses. You could say that he is just a friendly teacher, but he doesn't seem to notice other girl's boyfriends and if they're wearing glasses or not. (He didn’t notice my best friend getting contacts or her having a boyfriend.) I think I might be out of line because the man is married twice my age, but could anyone please tell me if he is dropping some hints, or if he just really thinks of me as a close friend.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2008): Hi there, I don't think you will be very happy with this answer but here goes.....
Id say this teacher is the type of man who isnt happy at home sexually. Id say his marraige is a bit on the stale side and he gets his kicks from flirting with young, vibrant and goodlooking girls.
The thing that worries me here is the hugging!! I think that is very inappropriate...and a bit icky to be honest. You say he hugs other girls too. And how do you know that he doesnt ask other girls where their boyfriends are when he meets them in the hallway!! Or even compliments those other girls when he sees them alone...
If you are interested in him i suggest you keep your distance. This is something that you should just not get involved with! There is too much too lose!!
He will just use you to ease his sexual desires and make him feel young again. Then he'll go home to his wife!!
Jeez imagine the consequences if ye got caught together....the embarassment in front of everyone such as friends, classmates and family. His marraige would be over and he could lose his job. And you will always be known as the girl that had a love affair with her teacher! You will get th blame!
If you wana talk more dont hesitate to mail me!!
A
male
reader, Andy00  +, writes (22 December 2007):
 First of all, thanks for the message.
I didn't expect this question to be a student/teacher based question, as these are the types I usually pass by. But since you asked I will tell you as I think.
I always find it a little unsettling to read questions like these ones, because it confirms that it's possible for young student girls to grow interested in men double their age and who are married. I always like to believe that since these are middle aged men/women they are just being friendly towards their students, but things like hugging and showing favoritism can really give the wrong impression.
I advise you to ask yourself: Even if he did like you, how could it possibly work out? Consider the age difference, and consider his wife, who he most probably loves very much. Myself I see no way of it working even if you were both interested, but I am still hoping that he isn't interested in you, purely for his position as a teacher, and because he is much older than you.
I also advise you to stop looking at him in that way. He is just a friend to you, and if there is a time where you start to consider him as anything more than that, then please ask yourself what I told you above.
Good luck with this, and I hope everything works out.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2007): I'd say he's interested in you sexually, because you're an attractive young woman.
Don't get involved, because he's married, it's not entirely legal, and it's just not the right situation. A 'look don't touch,' kind of thing, you know?
You can find plenty of attractive older men, (if that's what you're drawn to, like me), who aren't attached to another woman and who aren't boderline breaking the law.
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A
female
reader, missmel34  +, writes (14 December 2007):
 Hmmmmm.
I don't think he finds you a close friend. A teacher is a person of authority, a person who guides you, inspires you. Hes not your friend.
Is he dropping hints, well maybe. Its hard to say. He may very well be. He seems to enjoy having a laid back kind of relationship with the kids at school by what you've said. I don't think its appropriate for a teacher to hug their students, especially of the opposite sex.
I think my advice to you is just keep your distance from the guy. Just keep things at a professional student/teacher level. If he does do anything inappropriate tell your parents, asap.
One last thing, always make sure you are never left alone with him. He has your suspicions up, as a girl thats all we need. Listen to your instinct on this one, be guided by it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2007): wow.don't start liking him.i don't like this guy much.don't fall for him.look for someone else
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A
male
reader, TomWilkinson +, writes (27 November 2007):
 Erm... the simple fact that YOUR TEACHER is HUGGING GIRLS and wants you to hug him too is just WRONG! It's cool to have a crush on a teacher but not when they are, by your description, quite blatantly a pervert!
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