A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 17 and i've only ever kissed and made out with guys. I'm now going out with this guy who's 18 and more experienced and i want to give him a hand job, but i dont know how to do it and i'm scared he might judge me if i do it wrong. Should i tell him i havent done it before or should i act like i have and hope for the best? thanks!
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 November 2009): there is no true right or wrong to a hand job unless you injure him.here are a few hints.
1: ask him to show you what he likes
2: start slow and gradually increase speed
3: have fun! and show it!
remember first times are not about being perfect. its about fun. all sexual activity should be about having fun.
A
female
reader, Mis.Natalie  +, writes (11 November 2009):
 Hello there .
Well I would Advise you to you telling him you haven’t done that because I Know he would feel special because that would mean he would be the first guy and I bet he’s Ego would go way up , he can teach you and actually show you how he likes it!……
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2009): He can probably tell you've never done it before. Why not start the relationship by being honest and just tell him. Then he can guide you and teach you how to and what not to.
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A
female
reader, Accountable +, writes (11 November 2009):
 What's the kind of relationship you have with this guy? I was 16 when i gave my first, and to a 20 year old so was terrified I'd do it wrong! And did, at first :P But we'd spoken about it beforehand, he knew i hadn't done it before so was patient and guided me; I didn't feel as though I was being judged at all. And its because I felt comfortable enough with him to talk about it openly and share it that way.
If you don't feel comfortable enough with this guy even to let him know that you havent given one before, I'd seriously question the decision to offer it to him at all.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2009): There's really no such thing as a bad hand job. Just make sure his penis is lubricated and stroke the head of his penis, not just the shaft.I don't think he will complain!
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A
female
reader, Louise-uk +, writes (11 November 2009):
 Hello.
Clearly you're not comfortable with the situation. Until you are, you shouldn't think about taking the relationship to any higher level.
There is no rush to move quicker, he's only 18 and experience doesn't count for much. If he's genuine, he will be patient. He should never judge you. You should wait until you're ready, and you'll find that it will happen naturally. If you touch him, he might begin to guide you anyway, in which case you needn't worry at all. Guys are different, and what feels good for one does not mean that another guy will like it. It means that experience often doesn't matter one bit.
Wait until you're not stressing about the situation. Why do you want to touch him in this way? Is it because you want to become closer to him? Or do you feel pressured to confirm to what you think you should be doing? Never do anything that you don't feel comfortable doing.
I hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (11 November 2009):
Best thing to do is ask him what he would like you to do. Then you can do it as he likes it, and learn from it. Don't worry.
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A
male
reader, xnickx +, writes (11 November 2009):
 Dont lie, then he'll judge you and expect you to be great.
Instead, simply tell him you've never done it before, want to do it right to please him. He'll more than likely gladly show you/explain to you what he wants you to do.
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