A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend broke up with me about a month ago. He then asked for me back, telling me all he could think about was me and that he just wanted to be with me. He and I then went to hang out, and he wanted me to have sex with him.I kept telling him no, because I was afraid he'd hurt me again. He told me if I loved him I would, and he wasn't going to leave me again..so being dumb, I did. After we got done, he told me that he had sex with one of my best friends, he then dumped me again. The other night, we decided to talk about the situation, hoping it would help me get over it. I asked him if he said to her, "I never thought a girl like you could like a guy like me", he tells me he has no feelings for her at all..but I am not sure what to believe.I took him back, but I am scared he likes her, because she has a nicer body than me, and in my opinion, prettier than me..I just don't know what to do..I am scared he still likes her
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone, you all helped me a lot :)
A
female
reader, Fabulosa +, writes (3 January 2011):
Yes perfect statment! Explained it very well Cerberus Raphael!
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A
female
reader, Sweety123 +, writes (3 January 2011):
you should dump him he sounds like a real butthead
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A
female
reader, mylassie10 +, writes (3 January 2011):
I completely agree with Raphael. I felt the same about my ex too. He was always looking at everyone in the room and I never felt I was pretty enough for him to just focus on me. But life is so much more than looks and if thats all hes after, he will end up wanting more and learn his lesson. A relationship is so much more than physical and if he is this way, he'll eventually get bored and learn that he wants someone with substance. You are way too young to get hung up on this guy. Youre not gonna marry him so I suggest you move on and get a new bf. At your age, thats all guys want is sex unfortunately. You need to walk away most definately. He used you for sex. That is not the guy for you trust me. Don't lower yourself to his standards. You're better than him. I wish you luck.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (3 January 2011):
perfect answer by Cerberus Raphael - said it all!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): Your bf is horribly immature, just get rid of him stick to it! Don't believe any more of his lies. It sounds like he gets off on playing games with people's feelings and that is someone you don't want in your life.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael +, writes (3 January 2011):
Do not think too lowly of yourself. If you think your boyfriend is going to leave you for something physical I suggest you leave him. You do not need a superficial partner in your life. To be perfectly honest though, you should not be with him now. I say this because he told you "if you loved me you would have sex with me". An atrocious use of that phrase. In my opinion, one should only listen to that condition if it were for something important like "if you loved me you would quite smoking" or "if you loved me you would stop seeing her/him" but this man, he has gone so far as to abuse your feelings for him for his own personal gain and in return he offers nothing at all except doubt and fear. You do not need this. You need someone better.
I hope that helps.
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A
male
reader, lalala +, writes (3 January 2011):
Hello! I am sorry to hear about how you are feeling but hopefully I can be some kind of help to you. First, I feel that you have to love yourself first and all else will fall into place. Apart of loving yourself is respecting yourself. Apart of respecting yourself is surrounding yourself with those who respect you. Do you honestly feel that your boyfriend respects you if he slept with your friend? Also just as a side note, sex is not representative of love. Therefore, you do not have to have sex to show it. If you feel uncomfortable with anything and voice that to your boyfriend and he cannot respect that,you may want to be with someone who can.I cannot make the decision for you whether or not you should stay with him but if he cannot respect your decisions as far as sex, that is a sign that he may not respect or love you and you may want to evaluate him and how much he truly cares about you.I feel that actions speak louder than words. I do not think that his actions show that he values your feelings and it is up to you to decide whether or not you want to take part in that relationship any longer.The advice I would give you is to love yourself because if you cannot love yourself, no one else will. Also, if you learn to love yourself you won't have to worry about being intimidated by another girl. Hopes this helps! Happy new year and best of luck!
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