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Guys want girls to be exclusive but don't want to be exclusive themselves

Tagged as: Big Questions, Cheating, Dating, Friends, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (2 January 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 3 January 2011)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Why do guys always feel like they can make a girl commit to him exclusively and not the other way around?Meaning the girl cannot have her say, like express her feelings of commitment (ask him to be her boyfriend), or something like that, whatever it is? Is it social conditioning?

I've read before in a 2005 issue of a young women's magazine that guys pressure girls more often to commit than girls do the same thing with guys. And before (and also after that), I've had guys trying to make me commit, even though my mom said it's okay for guys to be like that and that they hold the upper hand, but then I turned them down and they became mad after I put them in the friend zone and some of them stalked me as well.

I'm just wondering. What do you think?

View related questions: stalking

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011):

No matter what your life experience tells you, no matter what you read in the magazines, no matter what other women tell you, this is NOT how the majority of men act.

If lots of the men your life act like this then you need to take a harder look at how you choose your male acquaintances.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I also told them I was seeing other guys and they also got mad.

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A male reader, Jmtmj Australia +, writes (3 January 2011):

Jmtmj agony auntI think you shouldn't believe everything you read in young women's magazines.

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A female reader, calico girl United States +, writes (3 January 2011):

Number One, it's a man's world. Do we have to submit to that? Hell no! Hold your ground. Men do not have the right to tie us down. Especially while they are continuing their "hunt" for other females. They want to feel like they hold some control over you, which makes you the safe little treasure for them, especially if nothing else pans out for them. But, I can tell you that if they think there is someone else out there that is interested in them, that they think is better looking, that even gives them the time of day, you will be one lonely little misconceived "treasure". I say, act on what you feel in your gut from the get-go. As much as you may want the guy in the beginning, life is too short, and you have so many more waiting for you. Those that deserve you. Be well sisters. Take care of you. Do not live just to serve a man in order to receive love. If he is worthy of you, you will feel no angst in your relationship - only love. As Sarah Mclachlan says in one of her songs. "You don't have to hurt, to feel"

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