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female
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anonymous
writes: I met a guy on internet just for cybering about a year ago, then I didn't enter for about 10 months, after 10 months I started to enter and blocked all the people except for one in particular. Anyway we started to chat not only cybering, I mean talking and such.Then things started to get different, I mean more talking and more sort of friendship and then more romantic he loves me or I think he loves me.. and I love him too, we're together now but haven't even met we chat and video chat every chance we got and he even supports me in my studies, in other words even though he got some defects for me it doesn't matter and I find him perfect for me the only prblem is that I'm 17 and he's 32 and I'm very afraid of hurting cos even though it all sounds fine it's still on internet and he may be "fake" even though I dont think so. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2008): I'd just like to know if cybersex for a 17 year old is even legal? I found this question searching for an answer because the latest 'mature' mmo is 17+ and that opens up the possibility of erotic roleplay (not cyber pe se) getting you into legal trouble? It seems idiotic to me when the age of consent in my country is 16 but I can beleive that when morally outraged parents get involved anything can happen.
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionno more help? maybe something positive?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 August 2007): I would forget about this person, you really have to be careful in these situations-even if he is much older then he is making out, 35 is old enough as it is. You are young and will meet plenty of lovely guys who are more genuine and closer to your own age.
Internet dating can be dangerous, this guy could be anyone, I strongly recommend forgetting about it.
Take care
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female
reader, Seratuki  +, writes (12 August 2007):
 Ok...I had to chime in on this one...
I'm involved in a similar situation, although I'm 27..and he is 38...but I can say, I have family members who have met people online and gone on to marry them...my brother met his wife online...so it CAN work...
The trick is, you need a plan to move beyond cyberspace and telephones..which is all I have right now as well...so I can understand how you feel..just take it slow, just like I am, and don't let it stop you from going out and living your life.
Sitting by the computer, or waiting for the phone to ring can be torture...
so like I said...do what I'm doing, follow your heart, if you love him there's not a person alive who is going to convince you otherwise..and thats OKAY! just be safe about it..and plan to move beyond it...like me..
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyeah he could have done lots of things as I have done but I don't think that he said I love you to others because he never said it to me when we were just cybering and we met on a different email address at that time, a "fake" one and a fake name as I was doing. Oh by the way at that time he thought that I was 18. I told him when we started talking seriously that i'm not 18. Oh by the way I meant cyber sex by cybering...and how on earth can a person look 53 when he's 32.. and btw talking to me when everyone's is out means that everyone is out always... he even talks to me from work when he's not too busy.And why about the age difference? It s not a problem.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2007): The things that interests me is that even after you not using the site for 10 months he was still using it during that time. Doesn't that seem a little stranger to you or is it just me? How many other girls could he have chatted to during that time? How many other people could he be 'cybering' with or telling them he loves them? Think about that.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): hi this man could be 32 or 52 but he is to old for you ,he could be married ?and using the net when everyone is out , how can you know if you can trust him ?when you are 32 he will be 47 ! if you decide to meet him take some one with you ,you never know ! are you not getting support at home ? please be careful and dont give him to much info on yourself , if he is as nice as he thinks he would be meeting people of his own age in public places instead of contacting young girls on the net .
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): 32 is too old for a 17 year old. Why can't get get a woman his own age?
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionto reply to GoddamnedROCKSTAR, i already talked to him on phone even videocall 2 he says he loves me practically every time we talk i.e more than once every day, we have even talked till late at night or should i say morning? he seems to really care and also seems to be a little afraid that for him it's too good to be true..which is also why i am afraid and decided to write herebesides that it started more like a joke in cybering for both of us and then like an open relationship and finally agreed that we both prefer being together in a 1 to one relationshipand why had i choses to date on internet? i always tought that people cant date from internet neither to fall for a gug from internet, so it wasn't my decision it just happenedand for my future? i can finish studying here in my country then transfer myself to his country as it is very near, and i speak his country's language, apart from that it was always my dream to go away from my country and go to live in another country so i won't exactly be giving that mutch.. and for a future....who knows you can never tell if you dont risk even in a face to face relationship.finally i dont know why i decided to write about it here cos it all seems going very good, maybe the fact that i cant talk to my friend about him.hope that i havent annoyed you with my talking and thanks for your help cos it helps me think over the situation more like "out of the box" thanks i really apreciate
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): If you are in different countries you have to ask yourself if this relationship really has any future. Honestly?
I'm not so sure. Maybe you should listen to your friends? You could have a lovely boyfriend more your own age and one who lives in the same country. At your age you should be having fun, going out to the cinema and on dates with guys. You are giving up so much to be with him, is he that great?
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female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (10 August 2007):
 Hi,
You say that at this point, your heart is involved with this man that you met over the internet. This is a huge age gap, especially considering that you are still in your teens and are probably just going into university. The difference in maturity between your two ages makes me worry about HIS intentions. I would trust your parents and talk to them about this - they will have the best judgement in what to now. If it your intention to meet this man, do not do this without telling your parents, bring someone with you to the meeting place and make sure it is a safe, public place. Think things through very carefully and stay safe. He could be legit, but he could be lying to you and you have to consider that he could be dangerous. I hope that I am just being the voice of doom here, and that I am wrong, but please take care.
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reader, GoddamnedROCKSTAR +, writes (10 August 2007):
 I read your question and I just had to reply to you.I met my boyfriend on my seventeenth birthday and he was twenty eight. I met him through 'vampirefreaks' and I was horrified for a few months that it was only 'fake'. I suggest asking him to call you or calling him, hearing his voice can help drastically. Talk to him about it, ask him if he really does love you, its reassuring to hear, even if its been said a million times. =) I hope things work out for the two of you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionbtw i forgot to say that that 1 in particular that i didnt block is him
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks to you r suggestions, he s trying to visit my country to meet as he knows that it's difficult for me to go to his, anyway apart that i'm verry happy i m also little afraid, and thats y i decided to post here, my friend tells me it's all a bad idea and wants me to dump him but she didnt talk to him or anything. thanks to all your suggestions guys any more are appreciated
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): No relationship has a future unless you meet up in real life. Why haven't you done this already?
Stay safe, and meet up.
You've been getting to know each other for a long time now, I'm surprised neither of you haven't wanted to take things further? It sounds like a year in to knowing this guy you either need to make this move, or you need to decide whether or not it is worth continuing your online relationship.
All the best with whatever you decide to do!
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyeah it's easy to say, and when it comes to faking he gave me his site where there is all about his life practically a boigraphy with pics of his family and friends, and about the age gap there are who succeed with having a relationship with an older guy, for ne it's fine and it'a also fine by hm cos he has asked me if i did'nt feel that he's too old for me and said that when i'm 40 he'll be 65 and those sort of things, but for him it's all right
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reader, Danielepew  +, writes (10 August 2007):
 You don't know who this man is. He might be faking a lot of things, for all you know. So, this is the first reason why you should move slowly.
Second, the age gap is very important. I don't think you could work a relationship out.
My advice is, stay away from him and find someone in the real world, someone who will be more like you.
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