A
female
age
41-50,
*acy
writes: I shared a drunken kiss with my boyfriends work colleague. We both have partners although he hasnt been with his long, we have txt each other and agree we both find each other physically attractive and enjoy each others company. We are both in agreement both partners shouldnt find out but i think maybe this is telling me my current relationship isnt working. Is it wrong to have these feelings for this guy?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2007): Alcohol was involved, therefore, who knows how you really feel? break up with the current boyfriend first before you explore feelings with this sideone.
A
female
reader, YummyMummy +, writes (20 July 2007):
I think it does show that you are treating your boyfriend bloody rotten. Wouldn't be nice if he was doing it to you right?
I would end things with your guy and get this other guy to end things with his girlfriend as it isn't fair on her either. Then you can both do what you like.
I think this definetly shows your relationship isn't working!
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A
male
reader, eddie +, writes (20 July 2007):
The feelings are fine. The actions are dirty, rotten choices that will eventually hurt two other people. It's terrible behavior. What will you do if you leave your boyfriend for this guy and then have the feelings for another guy? Leave him? And the next? And the one after that? You'll never understand how rotten this type of thing is until you're truly in love. When you understand love and value the whole picture, you'll realize why people find this type of thing so wrong.
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A
female
reader, marj +, writes (20 July 2007):
It's good to feel attraction for other people, but not wise to act on it if you are in a relationship, respect for yourself and others in this is what counts. If you are not happy in your current situation do the right thing and leave before you decide to embark on something else. Affairs cause a lot of heartache to the wronged partner.
If you are with someone capable of cheating then they will do it to you too...
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A
male
reader, JustaGuy +, writes (20 July 2007):
Hey,
Its not wrong, just because you are in a relationship does'nt mean you wont find other people attractive...HOWEVER....acting on them IS wrong - you are in a commited realationship, I'm sure you would'nt to hear your boyfriend had been kissing and texting his secretary!
I would think about what you want, what you could lose, is this just a lustful fling? Break it off or leave your boyfriend.
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (20 July 2007):
It sounds like you are developing a strong emotional connection with this guy.
Like penta says finish it with the new guy, or be truthful to you current partner. I think these are really your only two choices here.
k
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (20 July 2007):
Well, you can't control your feelings. But acting on them when in a committed relationship is wrong.
Doing it with your BF's work college is especially dangerous. This could spill over into his work. It's just wrong on so many levels.
Either break it off (completely) with the new guy, or be honest with your boyfriend and leave him.
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A
female
reader, 88jane +, writes (20 July 2007):
hey hun! its not wrong to have feeling for this other guy but it is wrong to act upon it while you are both in relationships. This is cheating and it is wrong!! how would you feel if your boyfriend kissed somebody else behind your back? this could be a sign that you are not happy in your relationship-you need to decide whether you want to make it with your boyfriend or no! if you want to carry on seeing this other guy then you need to tell your boyfriend that its over!
good luck hun!
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