A
male
age
30-35,
*jManny
writes: Hi, a bit of a problem, Ex wont leave me alone...?!?! Im single for about 2 months now and I work with my ex for another month or so, but she is being nasty and abusive towards me. I'm trying to lose contact with her but no matter what I do she always finds a way to get to me. For example we had a argument in work the other day, she went back to her dad and told him I was being nasty to her... He started threating me saying that he's going to call the police if I don't stop. I'm not doing anything, I have been ignoring her at work but I feel like it is not enough for her to leave me alone!!I really do not know what to do, And also if I talk to some girl in work she gets annoyed over it and starts an argument... I mean I can do what i like i'm not with her...? I know it sounds nasty but I don't want any contact with her but as i know her she will ask people how I've been and who I have been with. I'm getting a new phone so she can not text me or call me. All i want is for me to get on with my life and have fun with other people but she is a major problem and is preventing me from doing so. Any suggestions please help, i'm in a tricky situation :) thanks a lot x
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, somewhat_anonymous +, writes (25 August 2007):
You should go to Human Resources and tell them you are being harrassed. I don't know if it works the same in the U.K., but in the U.S. they usually have to protect you and give her a talking to or else the company can have a lawsuit filed against them. However, you should find out first if there is a policy against dating co-workers because if there is, it may incriminate you.
If it continues to happen outside of work, then you might also be able to take care of it legally. Perhaps talk to a lawyer or go to a police station, I don't know where the line is drawn between criminal and civil law.
A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (25 August 2007):
Hi
The getting a new phone is a good idea. She sounds like shes very angry!
You say you have another month of this? All you can do is try & stay away from her as much as you can if you have to work there for another month.
Try & explain to her dad if she carries on setting him on you. If he gets physical, call the police!
Good luck.
C xxxxx
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A
female
reader, penta +, writes (25 August 2007):
Okay, first of all, stop talking to girls at work. The situation you have with your ex should show you why work-place romances are tricky at best and should be avoided altogether. That will take away some of the fuel from this fire.
Secondly, go to your supervisor at work. They're probably aware of the situation, but admit to him/her that you need help. Explain that you're trying to leave your ex alone but she's making it impossible. Request a transfer, or at least permission to stop having any professional contact with her at all.
Then, stop rising to the bait. Count to ten, take a deep breath, and walk away. Say nothing to your ex (literally nothing). Give her vacuum (absence of air). No matter what she says, ignore her.
The opposite of love isn't hate -- those are opposites of the very same coin. The opposite of love is indifference. Practice this toward your ex. Good luck.
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