A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi I have been dating my current bf for a year and 8 months.. He's had more of a past with girls than I have (I was a virgin), he's done it with 6 girls. I ask him questions about his past experiences but he doesn't like to answer them and gets really uncomfortable. I ask him details like what kind of other things he's done with girls (other than sex) but he hates answering, he calls me a creep for asking him questions and he thinks it's really weird. i just feel better knowing details than not knowing anything at all. i ask him how many times he did it with certain girls, and his experience with them.. he gets really awkward and doesn't answer, i don't really care about the answer like it's not going to make me mad and i don't understand why he gets so defensive and closed off when i begin to askso is it weird that im asking him these questions? how much is too much info? why does he keep getting so creeped out?
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female
reader, Eskim0  +, writes (17 October 2010):
I agree with the person above me. Don't let the past write your future. I had only been involved sexually with one guy before my boyfriend now (my ex and I were together close to six years) and we were both virgins. I knew that my boyfriend now has a sordid history when it came to sex, but I asked him anyway...and he told me. I wish now that I never had asked.
A
female
reader, mizz.butterflies +, writes (28 August 2010):
 It doesn't matter what he has done in the past.The present is what matters and the future. Stop asking him. Do you wanna be the girl of his dreams or just another girl who wont stop asking him about his fast? Why do you wanna be a typical woman? Don't you see the man is feeling uncomfortable? Or are you that insecure? I once had a boyfriend who played professional basketball,and of course he had sex with hundreds of girls.I never asked him about ONE of them. It's called being classy.
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A
female
reader, Jesc +, writes (28 August 2010):
 I still have that problem with my partner.
I have been trying that "The past is the past, Nothing with the future deal" It hurts but I understand why.
I use to say I would not get angry no matter what answers. To be honest, I would. I really would. (maybe you wouldn't, yet you never know)I advise that you try everyday to forget about the questions inside your head. I use to be I want the truth right now 100%. After learning that some things are meant to stay there I regret asking and allowing myself to be hurt.
If you feel like it will drive you insane. Then tell him just that.
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A
male
reader, jkirk +, writes (28 August 2010):
Let me ask you this. What does the past have to do with you and your future together? Let the past be the past before it ruins your future. It doesn't matter what happened in the past before he knew you. Just let it go, he doesn't want to talk about his past with women because he doesn't want to offend you. You really should be more confident in yourself. That is what it's really about isn't it, you and your own security. (I'm not saying that to be mean) Good luck and just let go of the past for your own future.
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