A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I know this might sound crazy, but I have a long-running fantasy to have group sex with 5 men - I guess what you would call a gang bang. I would like it to be 5 men I don't know too well but who have been "pre-screened", maybe by a swingers group for example. But I don't want to do this at a swingers party. I also want to know if there is some sort of "etiquette" involved - for example, do all the men have to at least be given 1 go-round even if they aren't the woman's type? And are all allowed to watch the other men during their times of play? I'd like to have 2 piles of paper, one will be 5 slips of paper with each man's name on one slip, and the other will be 5 slips each with a specific act or position. I want to draw a man's name from 1 pile, then that man draws a slip from the pile of positions, then we carry that out. I haven't had great luck googling this. Mostly I find websites for much raunchier sounding events. Does anyone have any helpful advice? Or would he aunts steer me away from this long-time fantasy? Thanks all.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): Heartfullalove, it's not about the nmber of orifces, it's about the number of mandatory acts/positions. I want to do 5 specific things in a one after another series, and I love the idea of 1 man after another stepping in as a team effort. Not sure yet if I would want them all in the room at the same time watching each other though. That's one of those how-to questions I have. Do men want to watch another man doing it while waiting his turn, or would he rather come in when it's his turn, so to speak. And whichever one gives me the most pleasure can choose a "reward" for his excellence. I don't think I want this to be with men I know well - that's why I'd like to know the best way to do this that can allow me some safety. I am not interested in swinging, as in going to swingers events, but maybe a club like that could at least help me with the selection process. I have to say, I am not unattactive, plus I have the classic hourglass figure, although with a little more "sand at the top of the hourglass" if you know what I mean! I have met loads of men who seemed quite interested in me sexually, but not many I was interested in. What I'm looking for now is more of a purely sexual thing, so I could surely get participants, it's how to set it up that has me puzzled.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): Sure...I confess you have me mildly confused. Essentially you have three penetrable orifices (mouth, vagina and anus) - where do the other two guys 'fit in'?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): Heartfullalove, to answer your question about why exactly 5, it's because of the 5 "basics" I want to be sure to do during the episode.
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female
reader, MBHP  +, writes (25 October 2009):
If you're single and you don't have any sexual issues from the past then why not. But it might be wise to build it up to 5... maybe starting with two one night, then three another etc. This way you might find some men that you'd trust to join the five... if you get a bad vibe off anybody in these early stages then you can write them off for future 'get togethers'. Be careful who you pick, make sure you have safety words, goes without saying use condoms as well as making sure they've been tested recently. Most fantasies are great because they're fantasies though, things rarely turn out just how they do in your mind. Good luck though x
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): Why five exactly, as opposed to four, six or 60? Also, don't you think it might make sense to start with a plain old threesome so you can get some idea of what to expect?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): I'm the original poster and want to thank everyone for their replies. Actually I do have a healthy level of self-respect, and if anything I think of this as me using the men, not them using me! And of course they would all know the deal in advance, so no one would be getting used against his will. No, I'm no slut-in fact I have had very few sexual partners in my life (my choice), just a high level of sexual desire. To tell the truth, I'd just like to have 1 (or maybe more) long, thorough night of powerful sex in a variety of positions, and how easy is it to have 1 man fully ready to perform 5 times in a couple of hours? It's because I know there are some very bad people out there, plus a lack of "how-to", that is preventing me from being able to do this. I think I could pretty easily find 5 willing men, but I am also hoping for a pre-screening process, if you will. I'd like to hear or read other women who have done this, but what I have found online so far is just trash (1 woman, 100 men, cameras, etc.). I just think this idea is a tremendous turn-on.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2009): If your serious about making this happen you need to think through the situation carefuly and make sure that you do it safely. Checkout the audio book "swingers" on itunes, as there's a capter written by a woman who shares your fantasy and does it with 7 men.
She goes through an internet screening process, and mets the men at a pub and then takes them home. Her realization once the party starts is that the event could get out of hand if the men decide that they don't want to honor her terms (no anal sex was one of them)... her situation worked out, but she was very sore for a week.
You might want to seriously consider finding a swingers club in your area, where you can be taken in under the wing of some freind;y couples who could assit you in realizing your fantasy with a group of "safe" men. I'd rather see you doing this at a party house where the 6 of you are NOT the only people there, and that someone could be making sure that your not overtaken by a group on anonomous guys.
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female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (24 October 2009):
 As long as you play safe, whats the problem?
Dont have any other advice though, sorry. Its not my thing x
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male
reader, eddie  +, writes (24 October 2009):
 I think everyone has a fantasy. It probably would be easy to find five guys who would volunteer too. I don't know what caliber of men they would be though. Guys talk about having sloppy seconds in a negative way so I'm not sure many would line up to be 3,4 or 5. I think it is a dangerous choice and best left as a fantasy.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2009): i trie dit with a couple and enjoyed it however whether or not you will enjoy it is a different story altogether.
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A
female
reader, old-spinstah +, writes (24 October 2009):
Fantasies are fine but some of them should stay as fantasies! I have some pretty wild ones but I know I simply shouldn't go there. Besides, I don't think the real thing would ever live up to the fantasy.
But it's your life and you're an adult - just think long and hard about the full picture before you make any decisions.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2009): I disagree with the other aunt, it has nothing to do with respecting yourself. I'm sure you already do!Having had similar fantasies I can tell you that it's completely normal and if done in a safe way can be an exhilarating experience.There's two ways this scenario could unfold. Either it's all about you and you have 5 men pleasing you and you are completely in charge and tell them exactly what to do and when to do it... always fun ;)Or it's the other way around with the 'gang bang' scenario where you relinquish all control and act like a slut for an evening.... again this could be a lot of fun.The concept of it being degrading or not respecting yourself only applies if you are doing it for the wrong reasons. If you are doing it out of curiosity or to satisfy a fantasy then good for you.Interestingly enough it's usually dominant or self confident woman that have fantasies about gangbangs, something to do with having a lot of control in your personal life can trigger a craving to be on the other end of the spectrum in sexual situations. My husband and I regularly do both ie I'll be the dominant one and 'use him' every once in a while and then other times he'll be the dominant one and ravish me... all very pleasurable and not in the least bit degrading. In the end your fantasies are your own and not for anybody else to judge!Have fun but always stay safe.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2009): well ive tried it with a couple of guys and loved it. do whatever you fancy its not a crazy idea.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2009): The phrase : "opening a can of worms" comes to mind.....It is also the opinion of alot of people (me included) that fantasies should stay fantasies. But if you wanna try it then why not. Ok I'll helpI do have to warn you that this is dangerous and you will have to do alot of screening first to be sure the guys are ok.I would recomend meeting a couple of guys, just meet and talk at first. Make sure you discuss what you want and how you want to be treated. Ask them to recomend other guys and talk to each one first!!Might be a good idea to sleep with each one first to get a feel for their styles and so you can weed out the bad ones.Then throw a party in which you are the only woman.When you are comfortable and are sure they are all ok (not too rough or mean) go for it.
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