A  ,
anonymous
writes:Hi I'm 16.I think that sex is disgusting and I'm not to keen on kissing either. Am I the only one and is there any chance of me finding a proper relationship?help and thanks
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male
reader, SPIRITUALASIAN  +, writes (29 April 2012):
I just think that you guys are the new breed of humanity who are here to bring more lights to Earth, rather than enjoying the physical sensation your bodies have to offer. I think some of you if not all who do not like sex are the waves of indigo children, Chrystal or else. Sex is a kind of energy but it is of lower part and hence it is located in the lower part of our bodies.
You guys should be happy with what you feel and enjoy the freedom you guys have without attachment to sex like the rest of humanity.
Look within, practise spirituality and help elevate humanity consciousness by meditating. You are here for a reason, that is to bring more lights to the world and you are not alone :D.
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male
reader, PoisonedBlood  +, writes (1 July 2010):
Actually I'm in this relationship where we don't have sex. It's like you are dating someone who's your best friend that just happens to be a girl. The lack of sex allows us to know eachother as people and there's actually no extra pressure . I think it's actually quite natural to be in a relationship based on friendship as opposed to sexual desire. This is why some girls avoid dating good friends instead they opt for someone who doesnt understand them or relates to them but intrigues confuses and excites them. To get to the point you're actually ahead of most people. T rue sex is about spiritual and communal unification that you want to share closely with only that person. Not a carnal thrill which is fun but ultimately damages the soul. Whether you believe that or not is up to you, but I just want to let you know that how you feel is not weird it 's very spiritually advanced and hopefully when you find somebody who you love, the true nature of sex will be revealed to you and you may not find it disgusting anymore. just wait for that person and never let some jerk convince you to "try it with him so he can "break" you of your belief. Trust me you will feel much more whole and content if you just wait for that right guy to date.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2010): Well considering this question is 5 years old I assume you already have your answer, so this is mostly for anyone else who happens to visit the page. This is also going to be quite a long post so bear with me.First I'd like to adress the issue of kissing, speicifically the germs.You can't actually catch many diseases from kissing and the ones you can catch are very obvious to the infected(like herpes)or cause little more than a sore throat and fever(thats mononucleosis). The HIV virus is not carried by saliva and therefore cannot be caught by kissing, unless one of the kissers has blood in their mouth(cuts bleeding gums etc.). It also actually is supposed to relieve stress(which I found extremly surprising). The germs are always there and they can be transfered easily but they are quite harmless unless they are a disease. You also get germs from pretty much everything you do, including eating, walking, touching just about anything and breathing. Just be careful about who you kiss and make sure they don't have a cold or anything.Now that the science part is out of the way,on to phychology. Kissing, as I said before is actually stress reducing(as is affection in general) and is experienced by most people on the planet(i'm not saying that's right i'm just saying that's what happens). Most people kiss to show affection or "love" (I could sit here all day talking about how that).Now I will express my personal thoughts on the matter.I don't think kissing is neccesary in a relationship but I don't think it's disgusting. I think of it as a much purer form of what most people think sex is, my reasons being: it doesn't have any negetive effects(those diseases can be avoided with the smallest bit of common sense), both kissers are usually equal(unlike sex where the male is almost always dominent), it is done not for the physical sensation and it has (like I keep saying) stress reducing effects. However, I don't think it should be flung around so carelessly as it is now, you should be VERY selective about who you kiss.And now on to sex, this can be summed up easily: it's reproduction.That's it, it's nothing but reproduction. The sensation is there to get people to do it so they can reproduce. Animals do it to reproduce and instincts want us to as well. But we are more intelligent and have a choice. Personnaly I find it repulsive and stupid because the world is overpopulated as it is. Most people do it for the sensation but just know, it's not love it's sex and ultimatly it's for reproduction. I am not really looking for a relationship now but if I do find one it definetly won't involve sex.If you don't agree with me then it's fine, this is just what I think. I would reccomend you don't listen to anyone straghtforward but take the facts into account and come up with a descision of you own.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2010): I am 18 and just hate sex. i am so glad there are others like me. I intend 2 steer well clear of it. I still like girls and guys attractively, just not in a sexual way. I hope 2 fine some1 with similar views. Every1 always says how will u have kids. lol there are other ways if people really wnat them.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2010): To the person below me.
Have you ever heard of condoms? Both you and the person that asked the question might be asexual, that you don't produce certain hormones (not quite sure what causes it), but that's fine, it's not your fault. Seeing how most people are sexual.
I won't lie to you, finding someone willing to be in a relationship might be hard, but don't give up hope. You might stumble onto someone that will love you even despite that or might even share your condition.
Also there is nothing selfish about sex, because in a proper intercourse both people should be enjoying themselves.
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reader, bluestarz  +, writes (28 February 2010):
To the person below. Sex is natural TO YOU. It does not mean everyone does what you do, sweetheart.
Have you heard of something called AIDS? You see, people who don't have sex, don't pass that nasty stuff on to someone else like people who do. How many people have died because sex is supposedly NATURAL? How many are dieing right now? Forget about the myriad of other diseases and infections that YOU pass on to others because of your deep obsession with sex.
Oh and my life is just fine without the need to use another person's body for my own selfishness.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 February 2010): Wow, a lot of you people are, I'm sorry to say, messed up in the head. If you don't want sex that's fine but the fact that so many of you describe sex as "sick", and obsess over how ugly and "gross" sexual organs are, suggests a serious problem in my view. From my understanding, asexuals are people who just don't feel a need or desire for sex, and they can't help that. But the tons of posts going on about germs and fluids and such seem to be caused by some kind of disorder. And yet a lot of you guys attack the majority of human beings who DO enjoy sex and intimacy, some of you even hilariously claiming that because YOU don't like it, it MUST be unnatural and "OMG how can anybody feel any differently?" Then you whine about how people judge you for not enjoying it. That's called hypocrisy, folks. Sex is perfectly natural and that is simply a fact. Sucks to be you if you can't get into it.Oh and to the girl who posted about how her boyfriend demands sex and she gives it to him even though she really doesn't want to...grow a spine and don't give him sex then. Why the hell do you folks want a relationship anyway? Most of you sound like you hate humanity so why bother. You might one day have to hold hands or kiss or something and OMG you could get a disease, because OMG everyone except you is just so damn dirty and stinky! Pathetic. Enjoy your cold, lonely, but germ-free lives!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2010): Wow. I thought I was the only one who thought sex was disgusting. But shocked to see I aint. Most of my life I seen it as an animal act. And that's one thing I don't want to be is an animal. And plus unwanted pregnancy too comes from this . I am 24 and will probabily be single for the rest of my life but it doesn't bother me. It pisses me off though when people ask me why I don't find a gf or just simply fuck. None of your business. I am uniuqe and accept that fact. Besides I got more important things to do then to fall in love these days. There is no love. Only lust and I won't fall prey to it. The world is overcrowded because of this. Those who think sex is disgusting keep your hearts strong. I feel this is right for me being single and not being a part of it. I don't know about the rest of you though
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 January 2010): Im a 27 year old guy and believe it or not I find it disgusting, some will say 'oh but you dont get it I bet' the fact is I dont want it! Kissing is the worst, I read somewhere though that kissing IS MEANT to spread germs, the reason being a bug named Cytomegalovirus, which is dangerous in pregnancy, is to be passed from man to woman to build up immunity to it before she gets pregnant.
The bug is found in saliva and normally causes no problems. But it can be extremely dangerous if caught while pregnant and can kill unborn babies or cause birth defects.
So kissing is a precusor to pregnancy, and for one I do not want to being a babbling brainless idiot (which babies are) into this world.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2010): I'm considerably older than most of the bloggers here so perhaps I'm more confirmed in my viewpoint. I'm 53 and been married for 16 years. After you get married you expect intimacy on several levels, including physical. Sorry to say, my wife refused to open her legs for me. She prevented me from making love with her. We would talk about it and tried again up to 25 more times... but she resisted. Up to now I'm a virgin and so is she, yet she blames me for not doing it.
I've come to realize, I think, that she finds it disgusting to have part of the male anatomy or any foreign object be allowed to enter her vagina. This would be why she also refused twice to participate in artificial insemination. Yet she continues to blame me for us not having children and does so in front of other people.
Then you find yourself in social situations where people ask you, "So, tell me, do you have children?" and you say no, and sometimes they even have the nerve to ask "why?" For that reason, I do not like to socialize except with people we already know who won't ask that. This limits our social circle.
I find myself agreeing with most of the people here who find that sex is disgusting. Although I haven't experienced it, it does seem upsetting to think of inserting my penis right next to an anus, and what if I got it wrong? It blows my mind to think that God put those two female parts right next to eachother. More mind blowing than that is to think that such a close proximity of these two does not bother most people. Who is the more rational and reasonable person? Me, or the ones who don't seem to be affected by the bizarre co-location of the female pussy and ass? Obviously this problem has gone unnoticed by generations, as the world reaches 7 Billion in population. It will have to grow without my intimate involvement. So be it.
And if the truth be known, my wife actually agrees with this, though she will never admit it. I wish I could meet and get to know a woman who admittedly agrees with me that sex is disgusting. We could get past that and develop other aspects of our relationship.
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female
reader, glamxoxrxoxuxs  +, writes (11 January 2010):
People, I have some news for you all. :]Sex is meant to be a loving act between two married people who want a child whom they are willing to care for and raise. Sex is misused and misinterpreted in the minds of almost all members of the human race. Animals do it out of instinct but we, as human beings, with morals and intelligence, need to realize that sex is not for fun. It should be fun, however, for two people who really love eachother; not for two random morons looking for a quick f*ck. I am 16 and I do not think you should hate sex or be afraid of it. Nor should you be scared of your body parts. We were made that way for a reason. I know sometimes vaginas and penises seem really gross and unappealing, but you should learn to love and accept every part of yourself. And you should save yourself for when you meet that special person you want to start a family with and be with forever. That's what sex is meant for, but people are becoming more greedy, lustful, materialistic and uninformed as the years progress, and it is truly very sad. I have been in numerous situations where I could have had sex, but I refrained because I am saving myself for my husband. I have a boyfriend right now who I love and care about a lot, and I am saving myself for him on our wedding night, so sex can be shared the way it ought to be. He is not very thrilled about having to wait, but he has a good heart and feels special that I am willing to wait to make it all the more special. I feel very sad when I hear about young people having sex and getting pregnant etc. But I mostly feel sad that they don't know how to use sex and they don't know how to respect themselves enough to practice patience and wait for someone they truly do care about. I find myself crying about it all the time. I really hope all of you reading this can understand how I feel and I hope it's made you think about your feelings about sex. I hope I could change your minds for the better. :]
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female
reader, Don888 +, writes (29 December 2009):
Ummm well i am 20 years old and still a virgin so i am not a sex freak when i say this...I Don't think sex is disgusting when is done by people who love each other...people want to express their love both emotionally and physically so I do not think it is an unnatural thing...animals do it for gosh sake..:)
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reader, Don888 +, writes (29 December 2009):
Ummm well i am 20 years old and still a virgin so i am not a sex freak when i say this...I Don't think sex is disgusting when is done by people who love each other...people want to express their love both emotionally and physically so I do not think it is an unnatural thing...animals do it for gosh sake..:)
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female
reader, livi1234 +, writes (6 December 2009):
ok. ive been reading these answers and i honestly think u all are crazy. im 16 yrs old and i honestly think sex is one of the best things ever. (no lie). ive been haveing sex since the age of 14 and i willl always hav sex. its not disgusting and its not unnatural. damn animals do it all the time. u all may say that im too yung or watever but im just saying sex is not bad. (in my opinion) its very good.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2009): I have to completely agree with you on this one. I am not a virgin anymore myself, but I wish that I still were. Sex is not natural. It is very painful, disgusting, and humiliating every single time. The only one who gets anything out of it is the man. There is no reason to give it to them or to make yourself feel the way that you do once they get what they want, and you know that they won't want to be with you if you don't put yourself through it. So I am through with the whole ordeal, and I congratulate you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2009): Check out this site: asexuality.org
And this site: Ace-book.net
You'll feel tremendous relief.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2009): Ok sex is strictly prohibited for me spiritualy and i am happy about that. I have never had sex and to honest i am disgusted by the idea it's not that it seems completly unappealing it's the way that people treat it.Im 25 and ive lived without having any sex and i wouldn't mind remaining that way to be honest. Everybody thinks that it's a wonderful act which to be honest is not true. If i were to enter into a relationship and eventually marry i would know sex would be an uncomfortable painful act the first time which is very unappealing to me.The only one that would recieve any pleasure from the experience would be the man in the situation,gross.At this age another issue is that i really find the idea disgusting even more at the reality that at 25 ive never had sex and most men have slept around quite a bit so i find that really gross. In the unlikley situation that i would find someone that i would want to be with the idea that they already slept with a bunch of people makes them appear dirty and gross and ultimitley undeserving.I like the idea of never having to have sex with anyone it gives me a sense of peace and i find most people that do have sex to be disgusting. I hate hearing it or hearing music about it, I dont like seeing it in movies. I dont feel that im missing out especially since it's something that ive never had. Maybe there is nothing wrong with me or anybody else who does not want to have sex maybe the sick, perverted people are the ones that feel they need it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2009): agree 100% with OP. I'm looking for a proper relationship not based on sex.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2009): Ok sex is not evil and it is perfectly natural if you dontwant to have sex no one is forcing you to but dont hate people just because they enjou sex it is natural
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reader, Sexisboring +, writes (28 August 2009):
Ok I have several comments. First of all I was sex obsessed for the first 20 years or so of my life.. I masturbated in excess of 5-10 times a day, had sex regularly from ages 16-18 and off and on until I was 20 or so. That being said I really find sex boring and gross. Not only does it lead to terrible things like herpes, genital warts, aids, or worse - a kid, but it it ackward. It causes people to lie (fake orgasms, etc.). There are alot of expectations and it's just not worth the 5 second climax. Also I can think of a lot of things that I like much more than having an orgasm. Drugs for starters - smoking a joint will make me happy for at least 2 hours... not to mention pain pills/xanax... the feeling I get from those is 100 times better than any orgasm I've ever had. Hell, I'd personally rather eat junk food, play video games and do drugs than have sex. Not to mention that just trying to get sex involves a lot of rejection, and if you do get it half the time it comes with the expectation of having some sort of relationship with the person... I don't need all that. Also I would like to comment on the people on this site pushing people to have sex. Telling them they will grow in to it and when they care about someone they will do it... speak for yourself people. Personally I prefer to spend my life alone and I don't need people trying to sway me in to the mess that is sex. Thanks but no thanks.. ok I'll stop now.
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female
reader, Soyasouce +, writes (15 May 2009):
I find sex very discusting. Those two organs -releasing blood (vagina) and urine (penis)- unite and create a further mess of vaginal discharge and semen. Terribly stick, smelly and infectious. Who would want to put an organ into another which has a proximity of only a few centimiters to that smelly dirty anus? What a hell!!! Discusting!
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reader, ChrisGS1982 +, writes (2 February 2009):
I just view sex as disgusting too, putting you body part into another body part and kissing giving each other germs and all. I find the vagina menacing too, its certainly not a particulary good looking part of the human body, I do not want to put my not very good looking body part into that. And when you have sex it gets sticky down there, yuck, it is so overrated it is unbelievable and there is the chance of an unwanted pregnancy and not everyone likes babies, and they get in the way of your own life if you don't want them (which I certainly don't), then there is another horrifying thing that is catching an STD. It just isn't worth the risk and contraceptives down always work anyway.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2008): Okay, So i'm 18 years old and im a virgin.... for some reason i'm very interested in sex, but its like in a bad way... that i'm constantly worrying and so frightened that i cry about it. and just think the act is gross and painful. OMG I just tried to watch porn to see what actually goes on and i couldnt, i flipped out and started crying. Now, I've barely even masturbated in my life(its been YEARS), never had an orgasm, never stuck anything IN there..im petrified. when i used to experiment at a young age i would flip out and cry too after i got myself to a "point" and i HATED the feeeling I still HATE the feeling, and i dont even mean to have the damn feeling(fucking wet dreams). Is there something wrong with me? Also sometimes i feel i want to be in a relationship (ive never been in a serious one) and sometimes i just do not want to be bothered with people and think relationships are bullshit.. idkkk what the hell. sex is the most complicated subject and im constantly thinking.....idk whats going to happen to me in the future but hopfully i will find my comfort zone with this subject.
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reader, stormfront73 +, writes (8 December 2008):
Sex is just flat out horrifying. I do not like the nasty thing that dangles between my legs like some kind of sausage and I do not like the vaginal area on a woman. It looks menacing. I love women a lot. The ones I am attracted to range from cute to very pretty. I love women's breasts. to me, they are very pleasing to look at. But, the pussy is not. I don't want my finger in it, and I do not want to stick something I have that is shameful and disgusting into their nasty looking organ. And every girl I meet, (even good church going girls) want to screw screw screw. I'm like "good lord get a grip". How can they not care about AIDS or getting pregnant? I have made it to 35 without sex because it makes me just as sick today as it did 20 years ago. I mean, start discussing it, and I'm in the bathroom hurling. it's that bad. I must have a mental problem. Who's to know and who's to say? I have kissed, fondled breats, etc. But, I will not go south of the border. I ain't about to go penetrating a damn thing! Far be it for me to question God, but I must say, this one I do not get!
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2008): When I was 15 or so, I felt exactly the same way. Now I can't get enough and it's only been 3 years or so :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2008): None of you are alone. I have always viewed sexual activity one of the most disgusting and inhumane things that two people can do with each other. 21 over here, and I view it as "not normal" and it will never be normal.I've never had sex, or been in a situation to. I stay out, because for me it doesn't click. I see a fe-male body part, and its like "you want me to put mine in there?!?" its like,why? there is hair coming out of it, and skin is hanging off wtf?Its better to just not think about it, and to ignore people who tell you different. I live alone and practically will be, since I have not found the right fe-male who doesn't enjoy it either and has the same views as me.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2008): I'm 17, soon 18 and I think sex is totally unnatural! It's the most disgusting thing there is! I have never had sex and will never have! That ugly, disgusting thing I have between my legs, I feel ashamed of having it! Friendship is as far as I can go. Friends is totally okay, but love or sex, nope. I have been hating sex since I first heard of it and I always will. No one can force me to like or having sex. I have always hated sex and always will. I hope I'm not the only one hating sex. I believe it's called being an asexual or anti sexual, I am both. I'm a sex hater/asexual and anti sexual. I HATE everything related to sex. I have never kissed a girl either. Nor have I ever been in love. Sex is evil, bad, disgusting, a disease, it completely ruins your life. Yes, I have masturbated and I'm NOT proud of it... it's like a drug. But I will find a way to stop this horrible disease (masturbating) it makes me feel so guilty afterward that I just want to take my life, vanish, forever. I know a girl loved me when I was like 5 or 6, and I HATED her! She was always chasing me, and I had to run for my dear life to not get caught by her! So, my real answer is, YES, SEX IS DISGUSTING AND TOTALLY UNNATURAL. It's a sick disease that most people have, but NOT me. I'm immune to sex and love ^^!
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2008): I'm a 22 year old male and I think sex is disgusting. There are times when a sexual urge arises for me, and I have had a fair amount of sex in my lifetime, but it's getting more and more difficult for me to overcome the gross factor. I've wondered about an issue I've had for a while now. I am definitely not attracted to men, but I am not much attracted to women either! It seems that having sex with anyone (either sex) seems strange and not quite right. Yikes - destined to be alone?
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2008): Hey I think *ex is sooooo disgusting. I accidently saw my parents about to do it (my dad put his hands on my mum's hips and they were tightly together standing up) and I felt like throwing up! I hated them and myself whenever I see something close to *ex. Humans are over populated in this world anyway- sooner or later we will die out- we should die out. We're so selfish to all the other creatures on earth. And I'D LOVE to have a best friend who thinks about sex the same way as me.
I think as long as you have a very best friend who's always there for you, you won't even have to bother about finding a proper relationship. Friendship before sex and all that crap. :)
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reader, stormfront73 +, writes (25 March 2008):
Don't worry about a thing. I am a 34 year old male with some sort of mental problem. I am straight and enjoy women very much, but I hate sex! It makes me sick as hell to even think about. It is something I have always been afflicted with, but thought I would some day out grow. Wrong. It makes me throw up today just as it has my whole life. And now comes the real challenge. I am currently seeing a girl who wants us to sleep together immediately if not sooner. I have not told her about me being terrified and disgusted by that unspeakable act called sex. She'll probably get pissed and just leave eventually. For now, I've told her it's this medication I'm on that's causing me not to be able to fuction in bed, so to speak. That is only buying me a little time. She is even trying to score me some Viagara! But, avoiding the issue will only take me so far. The truth will come out, and she will ridicule me to death for it. Call me a freak of nature, stuff like that. So, don't worry. It could be worse! You could be me!
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reader, LYDIA3  +, writes (8 March 2008):
Here's the long answer to the short question. Sex can be disgusting. It is disgusting when the whole world continues to talk about it obsessively as if it is the most important activity that everyone should be doing. In my opinion, sex has become the world's most important topic of discussion because it is a money spinner and people want to feel the buzz that goes with having lots of sex and yet they rarely find what they are looking for. The truth is, sex becomes disgusting for a girl when there is no sensitivity involved, and the activity becomes a function like having a shower every day. And if a girl ends up sleeping with a man who does not connect with her way of thinking, she is going to get extremely upset and emotionally distraught. Many girls hope for something very special and exciting when they become intimate with a man for the first time, or any time for that matter. There are plenty of women who are very disillusioned with sex because so many men simply do not understand their thoughts, emotions or sexual chemistry. This primitive lack of sexual knowledge is the fault of many ignorant mothers and fathers who do not teach their sons self respect; self respect in men is mirrored towards women. The sons of such mothers, make lousy sexual partners; they don't know how to talk to a nice girl properly nor do they have anything useful to offer her so they view getting her into bed as a sort "achievement". That "achievement" never lasts which is the reason why women suffer such incredible disappointment when having sex with these types of men. If a girl entertains thoughts of disgust about sex it is probably because she has encountered boys/men who have nothing worthwhile to offer. Boys who like to read widely, who have been brought up to care for animals and family members, who know how to fix things and build stuff, boys who love music and like nature, who like to invent and create,these are the boys who will be more likely to view sex as something special. Strangely enough,the quieter, more sensitive boys, who get accused of "being gay" at school may make better sexual partners for girls than the bossy, cool thugs. If a girl has strong values or is very romantic at heart, she has to find a man who is on the same plane of thought as herself or her sexual experience will be emotionally disappointing and even revolting. There is nothing worse for a girl who would like to be loved, than being with a boy who starts giving her loving sex and in the middle of it, he announces: "oops he has to go to the toilet first" or "I s'pose I had better take a shower first". That is offensive and destructive for the female sexual experience and yet it happens to many, too often! Sex for girls and women is a mental activity before anything physical can happen. Many men simply fail to understand this particularly young men who are out to notch their belts. They know nothing about how estrogen and progesterone hormones affect girls' libido neither do they comprehend the magnitude of destruction that they can cause them by not taking time. IF a girl's mind contains thoughts of revulsion towards sex because some boy stuck his tongue in her mouth when she did not want that, then she is right to feel grossed out by that experience. It is very gross when deep down she knows he doesn't love her to bits and she is just another female animal with whom to mate with. Her instincts are telling her he's not right for her. It is better that she goes with her gut feeling. That feeling of revulsion is a protective mechanism so she should never feel as if she is "abnormal" because she doesn't like him being gross. There are plenty of girls who get into disastrous relationships or end up seriously disappointed by their sexual experiences or even accidentally pregnant because they didn't think twice about who they got involved with.It is wrong of other people to criticize a girl who doesn't want to "explore sex" with some barbarian. Very wrong. That in my opinion is a disgusting thing for any boy or man (or girl for that matter)to do. We live in a world of choices and above all, girls should have the confidence to choose NOT to have sex if they don't want to. Finding a proper relationship with a bloke is not easy. The best thing for a girl to do is to become very clever at something and raise her self esteem to the max. When she does well in her life, goes to university, dresses well, finds an interesting job, good income and can afford a home of her own, the good types of boys and men will notice her and she will certainly not be left on the shelf. The good types of boys and men,also have self respect and they have well-paying jobs. They will want a girl who mirrors what they feel themselves. Men who are educated, are likely to be civilized in their attitudes towards people and therefore more sensitive to women's sexual needs.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2008): well if its with someone you truly love and they feel the same way then its ok ~ if its not then its just like filthy cockaroaches ~ meantime many just dont care to wait till they get married ~ many are doing it like pigs and filty roaches ,it is discusting how there is porn and how many unwanted pregnant happenings women have more of a responsabilty cause they can get pregnant men cant if women say no to porn then there will be none of it around it is absolute discrace
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2008): I think viewing sex as gross is a reaction to the media portrayal of sex and the clueless people who replicate that in real life. So in that sense I think a lot of the people here are very sensible. Lust is dirty, evil and ugly. No one wants to have sex and feel dirty. On the other hand sex is an energy unto itself. When its the proper time to have sex you know it. Its like a world unto itself, its a gift. It's BEAUTIFUL to explore that with the right person. I think seeing the ugly side of sex is a sign of positive discrimination and intelligence because theres so much of the ugly side of it out there. I commend the posters and wish them that they keep an open mind so they can experience only the nice things of life. Including positive sexuality.
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 January 2008): i'm 21 and i am single and a virgin and i think sex is disgusting aswell. I cant believe people like sex.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2008): Yes you can have a proper relationship without sex. Sex is absolutely disgusting! I have been in a relationship with my partner for over 5 years. We are very much in love, but neither of us want sex. We dont even sleep in the same bed!! Its a fantastic relationship! We have only ever kissed 4 times in 5 years too! So, forget what these perverts who thnk sex is "a natural act ejoyed by 2 people," its not! Its totally gross and sick and these people should be locked up in an institution. So, go ahead and enjoy your sex free life!! ITS THE PERFECT LIFE!!
Steve, a 37 year old virgin (and extremly proud!!)
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2007): I know lots of people who love sex and I know lots of people who find it disgusting. I feel sad for neither for we dictate our own actions and since we're all unique, it creates unique and different ideas. I like to think that people not wanting sex can be a good thing for the reason that its something different from people wanting sex. Diversity should be embraced not discouraged. So find someone who likes to talk back. My biggest suggestion would be to get a broader view of the world and more importantly to realize different perspectives and try to understand those different perspectives. A good situational understanding gives you a great leg up in this world and keeps you being diplomatic and open minded which is something that gets rarer each day.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2007): Hi there, I am 18 and have had sex, becuase my boyfriend is like most other guys and can't live without it, however it was painful messy and gross. It groses me out guys bits are so disgusting, I never want sex, kissing is alright if you really love them, but people need to understand it is not the most important things, like the people in tv and movies portray, its disgusting and messy and sinful. I agree with you hopefully we can still find people who respect our feelings, which my boyfriend doesn't :( He doesn't care that I hurt like hell afterwards as long as he gets what he wants, then a few hours later he'll be feeling me up and want more, even though i've been silent and crying with the pain! Stay a virgin its the best things, at least you will be respected by god. And bullshit he gave us genitals to feel pleasure, ive never felt any, and in the bible it is not mentioned- virgin mary- hello-retards who say god gave us them for a reson!
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2007): please... sex is good! It feels good and its your natural sexual organ with the other one ! its completly natural act. Dont be ashame of it...
If you have problems against sex, then fine. Spend your whole life masturbating and good luck finding a relationship...
Lool
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2007): I am 20 years old and even I think sex is disgusting and never plan on having sex. if you want to procreate then fine-have sex-but this world is over populated enough. And even though you hate sex, you can still find a proper relationship. i've had my boyfriend for almost 2 years and he respects my decision of no sex. you just have to find the right man. you are still 16 and that is pretty young yet, but an adamant decision is very hard to change.
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female
reader, Bella_Babe57 +, writes (13 October 2007):
 wow, as i was reading the replies i couldnt believe how many people are repulsed by sex! It's a natural act shared between 2 people in love, i dont believe its disgusting but thats my opinion. Considering there are atleast 5 people on this page feeling the same way as you, it will be easy to find a guy who agrees with your views.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2007): i agree, im 16 and hate the thought of it. if you wanna excite yourself touch yourself, but letting other people do it is disgusting. im prob just young and dont know wat i want but i hope it doesnt happen. its way more complicated then movies make it seem. some people like sex, othrs dont. i respect that as long as they dont critisize the ones that dont like it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2007): To be honest, I do not believe that it is normal for any human being not to like sex, since it is deep programmed in our genes to want to 'reproduce'.
However, you are only 16. Some people, like myself, are just not ready at that age.
You also wrote, that you want to find a proper relationship. This indicates to me, that you have never been in a relationship.
Important is to aks yourself what you want from a relationship and if that what you are looking for is not simply a good friendship. Also, the reason for you lacking sexual atraction maight be that you are bisexual or a lesbian. You should also ask yourself why you find sex disguiting.
In any way, being disgusted by sex is not normal. Maybe with disgusted you just mean that you fell it is strange or weired. Some girls need more time.
I hope you get better,
az
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2007): No, I think you're doomed to single life.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2007): It is perfectly normal for you to think that way. There are those of us out there that do not have any sexual attraction and we lead perfectly normal lives. What matters most is that whatever you decide, makes you happy. Remember, do not have sex because someone else wants you to.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2007): I agree. It is repulsive in a lot of ways. With luck, I will never have anything to do with it or romantic relationships in general (just good ol' friendship). Maybe in the future you'll meet somebody who you'll be attracted to and/or comfortable enough with to have a sexual or "intimate" relationship with, maybe not. It doesn't really matter. Sex isn't the be all and end all to life (unless everyone lost interest ;]), and as long as you're content who cares. Don't worry about it--I'm the same way. If you Look you'll always find someone in the same boat as you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2007): hi i am scotty
i am 19 and never had sex or kissed a girl and dont want to do so it is disgusting when you think of all those germs and STDs. i think people who have sex are dirty and immature. i get people say to me (one day you will have kids) it just pisses me off to think abou it. sex is a disgusting mess and is just an exscuse to be disgusting. i dont want kids ever i want a free life and marriage just fucks it up. kids are annoying and just nag you for things. as far as i am concearned sex stinks.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2007): youre right when you think of sex it is immature and disgusting i hate the smell of tuna fish and i am not catching HIV/AIDS subjection. we have a lot in common there are too many people in the world anyway and people are having kids too young which is totaly pathetic. i like fresh bedding not fishy spunk stains and wet patches. you dont need sex it is not compulsary i am 19 and never kissed a girl and dont plan to either. my life is my own.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2007): I just turned 17 and I am glad I am not the only who thinks sex is sick and disgusting i prefer to live my life without it. its just gross when you think about STD's germs sick ugh THATS RIGHT YOU DONT NEED IT YOU SHOULD FIND SOMEBODY WHO RESPECTS YOUR DECISION ON THAT I also plan to stay virgin for life and no kissing either gonorhea gross. World is overpopulated anyway.
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reader, bubooh +, writes (15 June 2007):
I also think sex is disgusting... kissing is "okay" but cuddling is fun yey~~. I'm 16 too and I've only had long distance relationships. None of those relationships have worked out but I've become a happier and more sociable person in the last few months. I still feel like something is missing though. I'm a girl but I dress and look like a guy, I still like guys though I'm not gay. But most guys don't like me(probably because they think I'm a dude). Even if they did like me they would eventually want to have sex... and I would have to try to convince him/her that imaginary "secks" is much better (the "secks" thing is a long story). It has been very hard for me to find someone to call more than a friend and be close with. I haven’t had a real best friend since I was very young. I don’t want to grow up. I want to stay young forever and spend my time finding someone that will love me but not want to have sex.
I’m very sorry I can’t give you advice, but obviously you aren’t the only one in the world that thinks secks is disgusting. ^_^
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2007): You think that sex is disgusting and unnecessary? May I suggest that you cut off your genitalia and hide yourself away in the mountains amidst goats and moss?
Simply put, if you don't like social interactions with other human beings in the form of intimate relationships between two possible lovers, then don't interact with people for that purpose. If you want a partnership between people and yourself, you can create a friendship by suppressing your own urges for deeper intimate companionship, maybe even make it more official by creating a certified corporation. That way, everything is layed out on paper. You won't have to find it disgusting and unnecessary any more. In fact, with that, you won't even have to think you need to do more than what's on paper.
1) Mentioned persons' have the option to accept a weekly outing with me, and choose to pay for own meal and listen to me rant.
2) No possibility of dating which may lead to unnecessary kissing, hugging, holding hands, and disgusting sex.
Actually come to think of it, isn't this asexuality?
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female
reader, Sue43  +, writes (4 May 2007):
Sex is really a very messy act, plus it's all about sharing body fluids (and possible germs). Kissing is advertised as a sensual act, yet the mouth contains hundreds of gross germs.Meeting a really cool guy is such fun,but the sad part is that he is inevitably going to want to have sex. . . . ho hum, dating is so predictable and boring.Every time a person has sex they give a little bit of themselves away ...... for what? Nope, for me it's disgusting and unnecessary.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2007): Hi.. I'm 71 and in thinking about my own feelins when I was 16 or so brought back some interesting memories. I think at 16 peer pressure has a lot to do with what actions young people will take. Frankly as a teenager I never heard of anyone say that sex was discusting and that kissing was not an enjoyable experiance. I can say from my perspective that my wife and I enjoy a great physical relationship that includes a lot of tender feelings..touching and yes even the occasional sexual act. All rewarding and all part of a natural exchange of sharing one with another. Giving of oneself to another is the ultimate relationship.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2007): At first I thought I was the only one who thought this way, but I guess not. I've always thought that sex is disgusting, and I feel so sorry for people who think that life is incomplete without it. I'm 25, still a virgin, never been in a relationship, and you know what? That's just how I like it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2007): There is nothing wrong with you. This is a personal choice. To have sex and to not have it is your decision for whatever reasons you choose.
I wasn't keen on dating, let alone kissing and definitely not sex, when I was 16. So to me, it seems like it is a natural process or decision. We do not all need to be sex crazed when we are youth. We do not all need to be having sex to be normal or natural. We do not all need to be adults who want,crave, need sex.
Sheesh.
You will come to know what sex means, you get to decide what it means to you and with this new knowledge will come trust in yourself, faith in yourself, and with time, when you are ready-sex can be something that is enjoyable with that special someone you love-like a wife.
Yes I had to put that last bit in there from a Mom's perspective.
Holding hands and building friendships matter more to even married couples anyways. Intamacy doesn't always mean sex.
All things in time.
Best Wishes kiddo.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2007): Sex is a natural experience that God created for us to enjoy with the one person that we choose. If you don't want sex, there is something wrong with you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2007): I'm 34 years old and a virgin. You know what? I love it that way. too many people seem to think that sex is the be all and end of all of life. It creates life but does little else. Despite what people in so called "real relationships" say. Does everyone enjoy sex? NO. Does everyone want it? NO.
To the people that do, I'm happy for you BUT please don't tell me that sex is this or that just becasue you like it. Like the original poster I find the concept to be gross beyonmd the definition of that term. Exchanging bodily fluids like saliva is downright disgusting and as a result I have no desire to "be" with anyone ever. There are many more things in life than sex. Think about it this way, no unwanted pregnancy, no std's, no hangups. Perfect life for me. A relationship with anyone should not revolve around sex. If it does than that is all these people really have and that is pathetic. Find someone who relates to you in every other way and you'll live a long happy life. Sex free and disease free.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2006): I think most of you are missing the point. Sex is a physical thing, and perhaps thats why you people think it is disgusting, but biologically it is... however, spritually and emotionally, sex transforms to the term "making love". Simply because two beings feel connected on a higher level of bliss, whilst fullfilling our natural needs and desires. Some people dont believe in love, either because they have had a cold harsh background, or have been abused in some way, or simply are jealous of other people getting the good stuff so to speak. So if you do not like sex, dont put it onto other people, its just human nature.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2006): Aww - you're only 16. People are being forced to grow up too quickly. I think your current aversion to sex and kissing will be a good thing for you. I don't think it will last, you will find those feelings when you meet, and trust, the right kind of guy.
At your age you are going to meet a huge amount of guys that just want to have sex and won't necessarily care about you. Because you want other things from a potential relationship, you will quickly weed out the loosers.
You are an adult in your own right, but you are inexperienced with the adult world. Have strength knowing that there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, whatsoever. Never let anyone doubt you, or tell you otherwise and you shall find yourself a great relationship, I have no doubt of that! Good luck :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2006): I am seventeen and also find sex and kissing disgusting. I always have and I don't see any reason why I should change. THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH NOT LIKING SEX! (Then again, at least sex has a purpose. Kissing has none whatsoever.) But who is to decide what a "proper" relationship is? You should find someone who accepts you for who you are. I know it sounds cheesy, but it's true, because anyone else would only be pursuing a relationship based on sex and not really because they like you for who you are. If they did, they would never force you to do something you don't like, so don't force -yourself-!
I think love has absolutely nothing to do with sex and the idea that it does is only a social construct. More people should realize that they don't have to be interested in sex, and if they are, they don't have to be interested in it forever or pursue artificial means to keep themselves interested. Anyway, sex is not compulsory. And I just realized that this question was asked over a year ago, but I'm going to post this anyway in the hopes that other people will find it after typing "sex is disgusting" into Google like I did.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2006): RE: A male reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2006)
I'm afraid then you entirely miss the genetic and social factors which tend to make some people asexual, and despite that you are, as I suppose, fully dedicated to sex like to some drug, you don't know much about wide varieties of human sexual behavior nor complex psychological backround of human sexuality in general.
Radomir
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2006): I would not like to agree with the people that say that sex is disgusting! that is crazy! we all were in a stage in which we were not ready to commit to it. but if the right person was found i bet there would be no doubt about it. + if you are scared of it dont force it, but if you cant get it dont hate it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2006): Hey there. I'm a 27 years old male from somewhere in Eastern Europe. I found this page by just randomly typing "sex" and "disgusting" into google just for fun.So you got a picture.In my age of 27 I'm still a virgin, never had a girlfriend and heck, I love it that way. I condemn destructive female lust, despite that I've been raised by really emancipated woman who didn't have thing very easy and life, and my conservative grandparents. So in essence, I am a feminist and I'm convinced that females are the more perfect gender, however that doesn't mean I will submit to their whims and become their obedient lapdog.I'm also good in letting girls who are after me down.Some of them are good persons, but I don't really want a sexual relationship. Odd thing is, for some of them just pure friendship isn't enough and as soon as they realize that, they fall off. Good riddance then. Our bodies are just flesh and I gladly leave the pleasure of flesh and sexual reproduction to lower primates. There are too many humans on this planet anyway.By the way, you can meet plenty of people like us at www.asexuality.org Take care everybody.Radomir,Slovak Republic
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reader, pegasus +, writes (10 November 2006):
No your not the only one, im 23 and still do. I see a lot of 16 year olds are saying the same thing and replies are genereally ''theyll grow out of it' i bloody hope so cos its really inconvenient...
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2006): you are definately not the only one!
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2006): I think it is so too.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2006): Hello, My name is Rimmer66, I agree with the initial poster. I am honest to admit that I am the same way. I am glad to see I am not the only one and that people of all ages here agree. I will not reveal my age but I am between 20 and 30. I think sex (with another person) IS disgusting. Just the smell, secretions and all the bacteria found on genital organs turns me off. Like most of you here I do get aroused don't get me wrong but I don't have this obsession like most guys to want to "do it". Most if not ALL girls are obsessed with sex and ALL girls want is sex which is why I think most girls are sluts anyways. Rarely will you find a girl you can be friends with and spend the rest of your life with, without having sex. If you don't give it to them, they go get it elsewhere and dump you. I don't like the idea of kissing either (exchange of secretions/saliva etc) personally it all disgusts me and makes me gag. I think women are HYPOCRITES, and sex has NOTHING to do with love. Also I f*cking hate kids, I think kids are annoying and obnoxious so I NEVER want to have kids in my bloody life - I mean we are guys afterall, and yes eventhough we don't want to have sex with someone else, there is always this natural need of wanting to releave ourselves (can't escape that) ThaT's what it is for us guys, you do it, you come and you are releaved....nothing to do with love there.maybe girls it's different, but anyways I'm glad I'm not the only one. I mean yes girls demand honest guys, funny guys and shit but face it, looks is VERY important for a girl, and face it, women in their 20's, late 30's become very horny and they would never engage with a guy who "does not want sex"
ThaT's my 2 cents. To all you people here who replied don't feel bad about it you should keep on drawing, playing music and harvesting a farm and maybe buy a cattle, but don't give in to peer pressure STAY THAT WAY. I wish I could find a lady that shares my same opinions.
Regards,
Rimmer 66 (A.k.a James K.)
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 September 2006): Heh, you're not the only one.
I am 16 also, but I cannot figure out what the hubbub is about "relationships" and whatnot. To me, there is nothing more frightening than striking up a deep relationship with someone. I don't know why; it just scares the heck out of me!
Don't get me wrong, I have tons of friends. And most of them happen to be girls. But I just can't figure out why I don't feel the same way as everyone else... So instead, I focus all my time on creative things, like writing and drawing.
So yeah... If you don't feel that way, perhaps you're wired differently. Maybe you were meant to serve a different purpose in your life, one other than simply passing on your genes. If so, then get to work on that novel/song/game/play/dance routine/whatever!! That could be your child, instead of a biological one...
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2006): This is all just wonderful
Why can't there be more of you people
The world is becoming overpopulated as it is
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2006): Hi, I'm 21 and have never had a g/f or kissed a girl. So no you are not the only one to have these feelings, but it is probably quite rare. I would check out this Wikipedia page: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Non-sexuality (check out 'Romantic Friendships'). As for myself, I used to be very shy around girls, but I don't have that problem anymore. I am a decent, honest guy and a lot of people can't understand why I'm single as they say I am a handsome young man. To be honest I am just not bothered about sex, I see it as a form of escapism and even having a relationship (sexual or non-sexual) as taking away my freedom and independence. I do still get aroused, but that is as far as my sexual desire goes. I'm not exactly sure what I should do about it other than wait for a true love...if that ever happens?
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2006): hey im 27 and i havent had sex. i had one girlfriend when i was 17 and so far that has been about it. it use to trouble me but not any more. most of the girls i met when i was 18 or 19 werent very accepting and cause i was so shy they used to be very mean and would get pissed off i just thought what twits they were. these days i would much rather go and surf or play music. so many people are so obsessed about it
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2006): I agree that sex is disgusting! You don't need it!
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2006): Maybe the proliferation of pornography these days gives you an distorted opinion of what sex is about? It would certainly strike me that the whole affair has been turned into a nasty, dirty, un-romantic, and as you say digusting mess . . .
Do not fret . . . wait till find a man that would you would like to share yourslef with, and see where it goes . . .
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2006): Well, I share the first part. If the orgasm didn't exist, humanity would see sex in a very different light.
The second, however, I don't.
In any case, I'm a dateless geek, so I haven't had a chance.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2005): I agree. It's nothing but a sloppy disgusting mess that spreads germs and can ruin your life if you get pregnant or catch something.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 September 2005): dont worry little lass, im 20 and i still havnt and still dont want to have sex.. im not ashamed, if anything im proud.. you will have a nice relationship when you meet the right person. good luck.
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reader, imsocute01 +, writes (6 September 2005):
 It is just fine feeling like that, and this is coming from a person that feels the same way so trust me. The only problem is finding a person that is willing to accept you for the way you are. But once you do find that person you guys are going to be in it for the long run! Because a guy that doesn't have sex on his mind really has to be special. So take your time and find that somebody.
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reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx +, writes (6 September 2005):
 We all become ready for sex at different times in our lives and it's just not right for you at the moment. You're only 16 so there's no rush! Meeting the right person will help, it may seem less disgusting once you've met someone who treats you well, respects you and someone you hopefully love before you give yourself to them intimately.
The thought of having sex with someone you don't like or love is sickening for most of is so don't worry! You just don't care for anyone enough right now and that's fine, wait until there's someone you do care about. It will all fall into place then, I promise. Good luck and hang in there. :)
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reader, communicatrix +, writes (6 September 2005):
 You're going to have a difficult time having a "proper" relationship if by that you mean a romantic relationship with someone who is expecting some kind of sexual intimacy.
If you're worried that you're not yet turned on by the idea of sexual intimacy, don't yet. You're still quite young, and probably better off waiting to have sex anyway. You may well find your notions of what is and isn't "disgusting" as you mature, and when you find a prospective partner you both deeply care for and are attracted to.
Why not ease up on the pressure for now? Just form friendly, platonic relationships, and use this time while you're still young and unattached to explore—your likes and dislikes, your interests, your passions, etc. The better you get to know yourself and what moves you, the better your chance of ultimately ending up in a satisfying relationship of any kind.
If, after a few more years and self-exploration, you still find even the idea of kissing abhorrent, you may want to talk to a professional about it. But for now, be grateful you aren't being controlled by your raging hormones like most kids your age. You'll get so much more done!
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reader, daniella +, writes (5 September 2005):
Your not the only one loads of girls and boys your age feel that way its normal. Wen you do find someone you like and that likes you you will feel ready for the stage of kissing and when your ready sex so you have nothing to worry about.
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reader, Delila +, writes (5 September 2005):
When you think of kissing another person it just creeps you out to think of all those germs, and sex just seems to be about putting parts of our bodies together that we use for getting rid of waste. If thats all there was to sex and kissing the human race would have died out a long time ago. Saying that, of course not every body enjoys sex, but most people do. You have every hope of finding lots of proper relationships as all relationships aren't about sex. If you are talking about a sexual relationship well I'm afraid that does involve wanting or even needing sex to be a part of it, kissing is usually a big part also. I'm not saying you will change the way you feel and I'm not going to tell you that you are wrong to feel that way. I know I hated onions when I was younger and now I can't imagine cooking without them.
Delila
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