A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hello Everyone,I'm hoping to get a horse in June and I have found this gorgeous Mare who is 6 years old. I'm definitely getting a horse in June and I'd love for her to be the one. I haven't ridden in a while but I can build up on it once I get my horse, don't get me wrong, I can ride, well too, I just haven't in a while. The problem is, is the horse needs an experienced rider but I really feel I have to take a chance from reading about her I feel me and the horse could do so well together, I build up my relationships with animals on bonds and trust and I feel that is how we could do well together, she so perfect. My parents are reluctant, they say I'm not classed as an experienced rider, I know that but I have such a feeling that this horse is the one.She has been ridden before but is still a little rusty, I will help her once I have her trust and a strong bond which doesn't take long. My parents are always jumping to conclusions like "what if she's a mental case?" and "What if she throws you off?". I'm not saying it won't happen but I'm prepared I just seriously feel like she was meant for me and I so badly want to have her. What can I do to persuade my parents? Any help is much appreciated, also do you think I should just take my gut feeling or not? Thanks for reading guys, please help.xxx Reply to this Question
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female
reader, mervy  +, writes (24 February 2011):
 Haha oh dear, I didn't mean to say that you were spoilt or anything like that - I just really wanted to stress the importance of waiting until the right horse comes along - which it sounds like you've decided to do which is great!
As I said before, I've seen too many horses and riders injured or ruined by a bad combination, and it can easily be avoided. Like the other aunts said, get lessons with an instructor - remember caring for other people's horses (which is what I do for a living) is great practice, there's no hurry to get your own.!
Good Luck!
mervy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhello everyone, I apreciate you all taking your time to write to me, Mervy this is mainly for you, when I first started reading your reply I though, ouch, try to be nice, But then I realized the only reason I liked her was because she was so gorgeouse, the thought of me not having her upset me but now I realize the horse I do get will be perfect for me because he/she is suitable, look it would be my first hors I'm just so exited I went a little overboard I guess, don't get me wrong I'm not spoiled and I'm not trying to be selfish, it's just when you've wanted something so much for so long and only been able to care for other people's horses, when it comes to getting your own I wanted a slight challenge but one which was still gonna be suitable, as much as I hate to own up to it, I know she isn't the right one, but when I first saw her I wanted one like her so badly. I'll keep looking, the only reason I said June was because my dad's business picks up around that time so he can afford a more desent horse around that time.
No hard feelings ok? I apretate your answer, but please I'm really not spoiled, I never nag, I always buy my own things I don't rely on my parents for clothes, or money, I can make do with christmas and birthday money to get what I want and litterally all of that is going towards this horse - not Shakira - another horse which is right for me.
Thanks again.
xxx
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (22 February 2011):
 I suggest that you contact a riding instructor in the area and ask her to give you a lesson on the horse - to see if she is compatible.
Then ask the owners to allow you to come and ride the horse or to allow you to keep the horse at your livery for about 2 -3 weeks. All the time riding and working with the horse. Only then will you have an idea as to what the horse is really like.
Too many people sell horses to novice riders like yourself, and when you want to ride the animal find that it has issues or is much too experienced for the rider. Both these things can lead to unhappy experiences and sometimes very painful hospitalised experiences.
Please also remember there are lots of unscrupulous horse traders out there who will stop feeding an animal so that it becomes docile, this they then sell on to an inexperienced person, and you can just imagine the results when the animal gets proper care and feeding. Disaster!
Please think carefully, and dont rush into buying this animal. If she is really what you want, you must take time to get used to her and her used to you.
Furthermore, have regular once a week riding instruction lessons on her, it helps with the getting to know each other better and knowing ones capabilities.
If you want any other advice, please PM me.
Honeygirl
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (22 February 2011):
 No !
I don't know much about horses and I turned your question to my 13 y.o niece who has been riding a lot a since when she was 7.
An unexperienced rider and a rusty mare are a bad ,risky combination. And it does not take so little to build trust and a bond with a horse, it may take months, a year ...
Also, at 13 and with not a whole lot of experience, one does not choose a horse without consulting an expert . Do you have a riding instructor ? Do you know a reputable stable owner? Ask them what they think .
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A
male
reader, ClearEyes  +, writes (22 February 2011):
Obviously playing off of the previous aunt's answer. Sometimes the horse is new though, especially at a young age like yours. Honestly its up to the horse to make the rider feel comfortable. Just ensure that you wear a helmet and other protective gear while riding, to avoid any injury.
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A
female
reader, mervy +, writes (22 February 2011):
Nope Nope Nope!If this is your first horse, then you shoudln't be "getting one in June", you should be getting one when the right one comes around. A green young horse (or a horse that has been out of work) is NOT suitable for you!A horse is not instantly 'the one' for you, it becomes 'the one' as you spend time together, and learn together.Don't just think about yourself - what you want, think about the horse! This horse is not going to appreciate a green or inexperienced rider, if she has been out of work herself. Too many times I see good young horses ruined by riders who think that they can handle the horse, or that they are training it. You may not realise your bad habits can affect a younger horse permanently - please think about getting an older experienced horse, who can teach YOU!Im sorry I sound like a grouchy old woman, but I manage a stable, and I see lots of spoilt kids (not saying you're one at all!), even girls my age (21) who think they can ride anything, or think that they can train and improve a young horse, and end up with a very sour horse (there are three sisters at the stables who won't even go near their horse anymore, as it bucks when they ask it do anything it doesn't feel like).If you're going to ignore everything I say (let's be honest, it might happen!), then at least find out if you can trial the mare for a few weeks. See if you can lease her for a year or two, and see how she goes. And if you're riding, NEVER ride out alone. While you may think your parents concerns are unfounded, they are dead right - she might spook at something, you might accidentally fire her up . At my stables, if I'm riding a young horse alone, I always call someone before I mount up, and after I dismount, so they know that I'm safe.As much as I've been all doom and gloom, owning a horse is a great and fun thing, it will teach you much responsibility!I wish you good luck, and please let us know how it goes!Love,mervy.
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A
male
reader, ClearEyes +, writes (21 February 2011):
Is this a metaphor for a guy? Horses are expensive, your parents may not have the money to shell out.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (21 February 2011):
I have limited experience with horses (the most I ever did was feed one). But the arguments your parents have put forward could apply to anything if re-worded slightly.
i.e.
Yes, a course could throw you, but so could any other horse! Or a car could break down. Or a house could collapse. Or your pen might run out of ink etc.
I say go with your gut if that's what you want. Explain gently (no teenage anger or anything!) that you appreciate their concern, but that you have made your mind up and would really like that horse. See what happens.
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