A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:what is the big deal about sex? i know someones virginity is a really precious thing, but why? i mean.. whats so big about sex? why's it illegal under 16? i dont get it?! i lost my virginity 2 years ago, i was 14 and to be honest i dont regret it, i wasnt going out with the guy at the time but we liked each other that much, i still hang about with him to this day! dont get me wrong, im not someone who sleeps about! but why is there a big deal about sleeping around? any advice would be great, thanks.
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female
reader, tayalouise +, writes (14 October 2008):
 I waited until I was seventeen, and in love. It was as special and perfect as I wanted it to be and I am still with the guy now. Sex is meaningless to some, but I feel that if you are in love and it is the right time then it will mean A LOT.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2008): Because sex ia touchy subject for many. It is soemthing that is so amazing when done right that some feel the effect is cheapened when it's treated so casually.To an extent, I see the point. But we humans have got to the stage now where we have learned to seperate sexual desires and feelings from emotional and serious ones (even though for best results sex and emotion and seriousness should be combined).But at 14... you are not at all capable of doing this. Yur teen years are best spent learning how to CONTROL sexual urges. Learning how to deal wth emotions that are going to come in handy later. At 14 you are not ready to face the consequences of sex. Yes even something so natural to our species has negative conesquences when not treated with the respect it deserves.At 14 you don't fully understand just how clever and tenacious life can be. You think that pulling out is a viable contraceptive measure. You think that condoms and pills make you immune from conceiving a child.These things all make you unlikely to conceive. But believe me, when life wants to exist... there is precious little that will stop it.Your body is telling you to mate. This is because it is at this point in your life that you are most likely to conceive. It is a long since unneeded instinct from when we wern't terribly populated and our life-spans were significantly shorter.But those days are gone. There are 6 billion odd people on the planet and mating is no longer a necessity. It is at this point in our evolution that we can actually start delving beyond instinct and going beyond our nature.This is why it is advisable that you wait until your natural mating instincts have died dwn and your body has finished its major changes during puberty.You need not rush. If you have all your fun now... what will be so special about an 18th Birthday, or a 21st where you will be able to do all of these things at will without the risk of getting someone in jail?This post may be a rambling mess. But if you are smart you'll find meaning there, somewhere.Flynn 24
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2008): You may not understand it now. But wait years later when your older, wait till you actually fall in love and tell me then you don't regret it. The simple fact is, 14 is too young for anyone.
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A
male
reader, prof_orr  +, writes (12 October 2008):
 The proper time to have sex is when TWO people want to.
Sex is a very private relationship an should be kept that way and your reputation will suffer no harm.
Just remember to use TWO methods of birth control.
You - the pill
Him - a condom
Life is not all that complicated.
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A
male
reader, craigm +, writes (12 October 2008):
You will find that for most people it's a big deal, right or wrong. Remember this - whatever and whoever you do, someday two things could very well happen.
1. You own belief about it may change. You will regret things.
2. Your one day husband may think it's a big deal even if you don't. It may cause him heartache, may make him leave you. I know, you think that if this happens you won't care because he isn't worth it and isn't accepting you for who you are, right? Feelings don't work that way. Think of a time when you have felt very strongly about something. Can you logic yourself out of the feeling? When you have been maybe super angry or very sad, can you just say, I shouldn't feel this way because___, and then be ok?
The better question than why is it a big deal is what is the possible problems that can result by having sex with people.
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A
female
reader, BigSis +, writes (12 October 2008):
 At such a young age ...how about: Self-respect? Self-worth? Having some dignity? Above all health!
You're body also needs to grow, and nurture, it's not ready for intercourse until after the age of 16.
Think of it this way....You had sex 14 years after you were born.
Need I say more.
BigSis
x
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