A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I gave my husband a party for his 50th birthday, he handed me a card for mine, I am hurt (we can afford a party)and I can't get over it, help? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, halawlaw  +, writes (17 February 2011):
i think he actually tought you would preffer a card . cause a party is pretty shalow. he didnt bethered to think he can start with a party and then give a card
A
female
reader, KittenPaws  +, writes (16 February 2011):
You poor love.
I read this question dimly thinking up excuses for him... 'maybe he thought you might be sensitive about your turning 50' (Not that you should be!)
But reading your follow up- he basically ruined your 50th birthday to 'get back at you' for wanting to to be home to keep an eye on your son at new year's??
I think you're thinking to call it quits wwith him is spot on here! Sulking is petty regardless, but to sulk and reap 'revenge' on such a big occasion (which, lets be honest- he knows that you'll never forget!) is so callous! -He'd even had several weeks to calm down and he was still this petty and nasty!
Life is too short for cruel and petty games like this, and you deserve better than this. 100 times better!
Don't waste your days stooping to his level. Rise above it and walk away from him before he can do the same thing for the next occasion! Moving on from this schmuck and never looking back would be the best thing you can do for your own happiness. -And it sounds like you have a great group of friends around to support you in this decision too!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2011): It was my 50th birthday. He found out a week later that I was disappointed. Some of my friends have asked if we went out of town or if it was just a family get together. I just have to say it was neither. Apparently, they mentioned to him that I wanted some small acknowledgement, but he blew them off. I thought maybe he would surprise me with a bought cake and chips and dip when our friends came in to watch NFL playoffs with us. Nada. I wish I had ignored his birthday. My friends and I are going out to eat together next weekend as a consolation prize, but as one of them said, it just isn't the same. He said he did it because I wouldn't go out with him New Year's because our teenaged son was having guests and I didn't want them to be at the house alone. He went out without me, and our son ended up in a terrible wreck. He will be OK, but I am thinking of calling it quits with my husband.
...............................
A
female
reader, Blonde68 +, writes (22 January 2011):
I too am convinced that he didn't mean to hurt you!
Men are just so so different to us women and if you approach them about it they reply with... "I just didn't think"... and the truth is, they don't!!
I used to actually buy my own cards and get my ex husband to write in it.. and no, he isn't my ex because of it, lol.. I also arranged a surprise birthday party for my mum one year as I knew that if I left it to my dad, she would have probably got a card, and no doubt some useless present... although these days she actually tells him what she would like for a present. Maybe you should too!
So on that note, don't take it personal hun, he really didn't mean it.... unfortunately men (unless they are romantic..which is very rare) JUST DO NOT THINK!
...............................
A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (21 January 2011):
 I doubt very seriously that your husband meant to hurt you. Men just don't think along the same lines as us ladies, and special days don't have the same meaning to them as they do to us. Come on..haven't you even been in a grocery store on Valentine's Day evening???? LOL...all the men in a sudden mad rush to get their lady flowers or a gift? Uh yeah...more than likely they forgot!!! Unless the man is extremely romantic and sensitive (yes, they are out there!), they need gentle and sometimes not so gentle reminders. As tennisstar88 says, if you want something, I'm afraid your husband is one of the ones that you need to hold his hand and guide him. If he knew how much it would please you, I'm sure he would be willing to do those little extras to make you happy. But you've got to tell him, leave hints, or tell a female family member of him that can help him. Good luck!
...............................
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (21 January 2011):
 And you were turning how old? I can understand a 50th birthday party for him, being middle aged..if you weren't turning 50 then I can understand just a card and no party.
You need to keep in mind that men aren't that thoughtful and creative when it comes to birthdays, other holidays etc. They wouldn't even know where to begin when it comes to throwing a party. So I wouldn't be so hurt by this, he didn't do it intentionally to hurt you. If you want a party for your birthday then you're going to have to spell it out to him, or to one of your siblings, friends so they can help your husband.
...............................
|
