A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:My name is Alex (I'm a girl). I'm a freshman at highschool. When I started school I saw a very cute guy (he must be about 26) who was a teacher at the school (he isn't really my teacher, he doesn't teach at my classroom). We kinda liked each other, we exchanged smiles, we chated a little bit. I got a crush on him, I'd remain there late hours after school just to get a glimpse of him. One day, I don't know how, he saw me, halted me inside one of the rooms, picked me up and kissed me. I felt afraid but could not resist, we made out for about 20 minutes. I so badly wanted him to feel me up but he respected me and this was the sweetest thing. He gave me a rose and a book and said that he liked me. Then he'd send me a rose or a note almost everyday (he'd tell other students to give them to me) but last month I fell ill (I got measles) and couldn't go to school for more than 3 weeks. Now this guy has really changed, he hardly says hi to me, he doesn't care about me at all, I've been crying all day long cause I learned from a classmate that he's now dating a girl from another classroom (the ones that will graduate this year), maybe because she's older and closer to his age but this really freaked me out. This is about a relationship and I feel so pissed off, I sometimes think I should confront that stupid girl. My mom knows I am a decent girl and that I will not have sex with anybody, I have to say that this guy always respected this and he never did anything wrong. My mom knows how sad I am, she's thinking about talking to this teacher and tell him about my feelings and talk to him about how he's loosing someone who loves him like crazy, I can't believe he's doing this to me. Now HE knew that I liked him, he could have sent me a note to ask if I was feeling better. And instead of this he's now with this stupid and shallow girl only because she's older. I sometimes feel he likes that girl more because I'm fat and ugly. He should be respectful at least towards young ladies like myself, if not towards the school where he works.
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female
reader, EtTuBrute  +, writes (6 July 2011):
 What scares me is the words you use to describe this event. "I felt afraid but could not resist..." You didn't ask him to kiss you, yet he did it anyway.
You're not fat and ugly in any way. Obviously he was attracted to you because he kissed you. Please do not feel bad because what he is doing is wrong. He is an adult and a teacher! He could get fired, go to jail, and be deemed a pedophile for what he's doing.
Don't be angry with the girl he's "dating" now. He will soon leave her and do the same thing with another girl, because he doesn't care about each of you. He's simply using young girls.
A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (4 July 2011):
 your teacher realises that what he did was really stupid and could cost him his career as if he gets fired from your school, no other school will employ him either.
he wants to move on from this and if you care about him at all you will accept this. think of it this way, yo uare just turned 16, you are still a child in the eyes of the law, a school child. what sort of adult man would really want to have a relationship with a girl of your age (and i mean RELATIONSHIP not just a fumble or some casual sex- a lot of men would happily do that with a teenage girl) you would be worlds apart if you tried to date each other properly - he wouldn't even be able to take you out and buy you a beer. he realises the wrongness of what he did and he just wants to put it behind him now so i hope you can do the same.
i know you are upset at the moment and you miss him but it will get easier for you and you will get over this
x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2011): How can some people be so cruel? He never did antyhing bad to me, I let that happen, I made him feel that way, is kissing enough to put someone in jail? I know that what he did is wrong, especially because of the way he lied to me. I'm not 13 years old, I became 16 today, I'm old enough to take care of myself but I am very close to my mom and she has the right to help me. She's not unhappy about my feelings for him but about how he treated me. My mother called one of the teachers and got his e-mail, I wrote an e-mail to him. I let him know that my mother knows about this and that she's very worried about how I feel and about the way he behaves. He answered me and said that he stopped contacting me because when he asked about me when I was abscent, a teacher (a lady who was my Physics tutor) told him I was about to quit school, and that I had told my dad about him being after me and that he had to leave me alone. This is absolutely false, I never did this. How can someone (this teacher) be so cruel to do this to me? He also said that this girl who's supposed to be his new girlfriend is actually his sister's niece and that he drives her home because of that, he says this girl isn't his girlfriend or anything like this. I felt terrible when he wrote he would probably not continue teaching there anymore because of the gossip that came from my attitude. He's afraid he might be fired because of that gossip, he admitted that it was wrong for him to kiss me and that he really liked me but that I was too young for him and he was afraid my family would oppose him and that he would have troubles in his life. At the end of the e-mail he wrote, he sent me a verse that he wrote about how he felt. I really think he's really suffering. I cried a lot today and my mother said she would let me see him only if she talked to him first and as long as it was made clear that there would be no intimacy between me and him (we're Roman Catholic), and that she would always be close to me and support me. My dad is 16 years older than her so she understands about the age difference but she says she's really bothered by the way he acted and because he had no respect for the school and for his job. This is Alex and I am from Mexico (my highschool is a private one).
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A
female
reader, sammy1986 +, writes (3 July 2011):
i would forget about him he isnt worth it anyway student teacher relationships are illegal i would not go anywhere near him as if anyone at the school found out you could be in serious trouble both of you
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A
female
reader, loveshimithink +, writes (3 July 2011):
 ummm,,,he needs to be in jail sweetheart!!you will get over a crush, but your mama doesnt need to condone you dating a teacher!!
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A
female
reader, MissTellAll +, writes (3 July 2011):
 Relationships between students and teachers is not okay. You're a kid. I don't say that in a demeaning way, but you're a freshman in high school. He is an adult. There is something seriously whacked out in his brain if he thinks dating his students is okay. This can, and seems to already have, cause emotional and psychological damage in the students he chooses to pursue. The fact that you were interested does very little to support a relationship between someone so very under aged and someone who is an adult.This is going to sound very blunt and harsh, but he doesn't care. When you were temporarily out of the picture he went of and picked up a new girl right away. This is in no way a reflection on you, the way you look, or your personality. This is a reflection of the fact that, though he may have been sweet to you and try to charm you, he jumped ship the second you were unavailable. The best thing to do here is to drop it. Find someone your own age to pursue or wait until you're legally an adult. When you're legally an adult date anyone your heart desires (who is also legally an adult).I know this answer may seem bland and obvious, but please don't pursue something with him or anyone so much older. This entire situation begs the question: "What does he want with a teenage girl?"I hope this helps. Good luck to you, and I'm sorry for all of your heartache.
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A
male
reader, bruce lee  +, writes (3 July 2011):
 Let me get this straight. You are aged from about 13 to 15 and some teacher kissed you behind closed doors?It's called criminal behaviour. Speak to a police officer about it and see what he/she has to say.That is all. Enjoy the day and God bless.
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A
female
reader, angelDlite +, writes (3 July 2011):
he's a paedophile if he is going around picking up young girls at his school! i can't actually believe your mum condones this and wants to have to speak to him for facilitate this 'relationship'
in spite of how utterly wrong this is, i appreciate that you are upset by his rejection. in time you will grow up to realise that leaving you was the best thing he could have done for you
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A
female
reader, blueskyday +, writes (3 July 2011):
guessing by your flag Italian right? and your like 15? same age as me, well here's the thing i in a way know how you feel i liked my teacher but he never did anything like your teacher did no matter how much i'd loved it if he had. anyways the point is this man isn't a good man for you one your underage and i know it's tough to hear since stuff did already happen but it's wrong for many reasons something off the topic of age is he's a jerk, he sounded like he cared about you but than doesn't see if your doing better or at least say hi to you? he's being a total jerk i would think that over this time he was re-considering how he could get in trouble and etc which would be understandable but since he is dating another student this is completely horrifying, i'm just wondering how many times he's played this little trick! but you know the thing is you shouldn't confront him and definitely not your mom to be honest it sounds like you want him back, there's going to be other girls and he'll do the same thing, and when you likely get into an argument he'll do the same thing, just ignore you. the thing to do now is wait, get your mind off of him and in time you'll be over him. and there might be a time where he see's you don't care anymore and take interest in you again but don't fall for it, move on with out him. you seem like a nice girl you deserve better than that you have to realize that. though quick question, is it legal for him to have a relationship with students? cause students don't necessarily keep quite wouldn't the principle know? and don't think of getting him back by telling just because you don't want him with that girl or you want him to suffer it makes no sense cause when he kissed you and sent you things you wanted him too and you didn't stop him some might say you should go to the authority's but in that situation where there's a mutual attraction i think not. i hope this helps! best of luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2011): he's a creep simply because he's a teacher so he shouldn't even be looking at any of the students at the school. it's totally unprofessional because he's a teacher and because of the big age gap. this is some serious ethical violations here not because he broke your heart but because he shouldn't have ever even looked at you nor at any other girl in the school. he should stick with women his own age and who are not part of the school
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2011): this teacher is USING you. he does not love you. do you understand this? is it normal in mexico for teachers to have romantic relationships with their students? this sounds very wrong. wrong, wrong, and bad. why does your mother want to change this man's mind? she should want to report him to his boss, your relationship with this man is very inappropriate and bad for you. this man should lose his teaching position for what he has done with you. he knows what he is doing. he is toying and playing with fresh young female meat. that means: YOU. he is having his fun with you, at your expense. do you understand this? you should not love this man, you should HATE him.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2011): This is Alex, and I'm 16 years old.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (3 July 2011):
 Before I try and give you some advice can I ask what age are you?
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