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age
30-35,
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writes: Hello again I'm sure many of you have heard that thing about nice guy vs the bad boy type and the bad always wins I am a nice guy I am very loving and caring and also very sensitive (not a quality I'm proud of but its there) and I love to help people in need with anything. But here's the problem I feel like I am not meant to be with no one like I don't deserve love now I know what most of you are thinking "wait you are still young you've got your whole life ahead of you" but I honestly don't feel that way. I've been rejected by a girl that was perfect for me in every way possible but she had a boyfriend and was very much in love with him. But I moved on and still got rejected. It was worse every time I had been rejected. Until now I have a gf but who I am very much in love with but after being with me she decides she doesn't want me because I am the way I am and it absolutely devastated me now we will seem fine at one moment but get into a fight the next. Idk what to do I feel like I just don't deserve anyone or to feel loved. I have only been told I am cute by to girls one was my first crush and the other was my first gf which is still my gf today idk what to do why do I feel like this is there any hope for a guy like me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your advice and things have been looking up for me and gf I have been a lot happier and she seems it too
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male
reader, LovelessAct1  +, writes (2 December 2010):
I'm going to be kind of blatant here:
1. Yes there is definitely hope for the nice guy, BUT...
2. You need to control how sensitive you are. Most girls, especially after dating Mr. Badboy, see how wrong they are and "just wish they had a nice sensitive man in their life." But in reality, that's not what they want at all. Once they do get it everything is wonderful, until they realize how much drama there is in their relationship due to it involving two very sensitive people. You said yourself that you and your GF would be fine one moment, then be fighting the next... well there you have it. Two sensitive people leads to an unstable relationship.
3. However, being the badboy isn't the solution either. Because then you have one sensitive person who is complimented by an emotionless git. Trust me; girls may say they want the Bad boy OR the sensitive man, but in reality neither are good for them.
4. Work on being in the middle of bad boy and sensitive. There is no healthiness to being overly dramatic or completely unemotional. Both are a bad road. You're on the sensitive side of the spectrum already, so I say its time to start working towards that common ground. Try to worry less about petty things (I mean, you're a 16 year old posting how you'll never find love... a little dramatic wouldn't you say?) Try not to get so worked up over it and realize how young you are and how many more amazing experiences you'll have.
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A
female
reader, largentsgirl89 +, writes (2 December 2010):
 Everyone deserves love (besides those individulas who engage in atrocious behavior and don't give love) Including you and there is always hope in this world, always.
It is true that typically girls in your age range usually go for the bad boy types, either to make mommy and daddy mad or because they have self esteem issues and don't know a good thing if it were to bite them on the butt.
When you grow up, that's what women want in a man. Is someone who is kind and sensitive and willing to be there for them and listen to them. Not the guy on the Harley that rides off into the sunset everytime something gets complicated.
What do you and your gf fight about? The little stuff? Big stuff? Idk what you two fight about, but's normal and healthy for a couple to fight. As long as it's constructive fighting and not destructive fighting.
You get what you give. So give the world some love. One day you will find a woman who makes your heart smile (cheesy I know) but very true and you will cherish her and she will cherish you and you won't be able to believe that she is all yours.
You deserve love. You deserve someone who will love you and cherish you just as much as you love and cherish them. You deserve to be happy. You deserve a wonderful and beautiful life. You deserve everything that this world has to offer. Don't let anyone ever tell you any different.
Good luck and as you get older, things become a little clearer.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (2 December 2010):
 There is always hope for those who seek it. No you are not alone and you never shall be. There are oceans of people who may feel as romantically hopeless as you. They feel as though their own existence is wrong. But it is quite the opposite. Those who strive to do what is right, those who treat others with respect and the strength and nobility to make them happy will always find some form of peace when they realize that it is not them. They are not the ones who are wrong, it is all others. One day those who sought the dangerous types will see how mistaken they were. Those who gave the good people a chance will never regret.
Rarely do we find people who are undeserving of love. People who committ great atrocities are unworthy of such benevolence and mercy but everyone else, those who express love, will always recieve love in return. Sometimes it will not feel this way. Sometimes you might feel as though you were meant to die alone and suddenly, there is a melancholy form of peace inside. Those feelings are wrong. You will not die alone because you will always have people who love you. If you give love, you will always be remembered and those who remember will always love you in return. It is the natural order and an impregnable balance.
Do not stop being you. You found love once, you will find it again, hopefully, the next woman will know what she wants and she will find it in you. Cherish that. And NEVER be ashamed of being sensitive. To be sensitive is to truly appreciate everything the world has to offer, in both form and function.
I hope that helps.
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