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anonymous
writes:My ex finished with me for someone else a month ago and has hurt me so much. I cant describe how it feels but my whole life has turned upside down. I love him so much and cant stop myself. The thing is, in the last few months of our relationship he began to deal drugs. Now Im thinking of telling the police so I can ruin his life like he has mine. Its the only way I can get revenge and I know I would feel better if I did this to him. But I dont want to be known as a grass if I get found out. What should I do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2007): Alright calm down people
Firstly, you asked the question because you wanted our opinions correct?
Well it seems obvious that you've made your mind up as you are disagreeing with everyone anyway.
But regardless, If it was such an issue for you before you wouldn't have been going out with a dealer. It didnt bother you before, but now you want to send him to prison just to make yourself feel better?
And if you say its because he shouldnt be dealing in class A drugs, then if you felt that way before you wouldnt have gone out with him in the first place.
My ex started dealing and i ended it. What he does with his life is up to him but im not getting involved.
Leave him alone if he wants to be an idiot then so be it, but i dont think you're doing this for the right reasons
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell maybe you ought to read the question again then because I did not even say that he was selling grass.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2007): Also, you can't say he's selling grass, then call me an idiot because I'm not a mind reader and didn't know he was peddling cocaine and ecstasy.
I can see why the guy got fed up, you're very immature and argumentitive.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI just want to say, in response to the anonymous reply on 9 December, my ex is not selling just weed. Its more like A class drugs. I think its sick that you are condoning this - its not harming anyone - WHAT??!!! Have u never heard of people dying from takin ecstasy tablets or becomin addicted to coke? You are obviously a user yourself otherwise you wouldnt think it was harmless. THATS SICK.
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reader, jm81690  +, writes (9 December 2007):
 Also, obviously it was OK and you just ignored it when you were with him, you're convincing yourself there's fault in it so you can justify hurting him.I'm not trying to patronize you, I just think seeking revenge on your ex-boyfriend is wrong.I have no doubt he probably was an inconsiderate boyfriend, but if you intentionally ruin his life just to make yourself feel better, you'll be stooping alot lower than him.Rather than telling yourself to turn him in and ruin his life, try telling yourself he was garbage and you're better off without him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2007): You only want to here an opinion if that opinion is agreeing with yours.
And seeling weed, whatever, he's not hurting anyone...
You want to ruin someones life because they don't want to spend it with you, that makes you sick.
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reader, rcn  +, writes (9 December 2007):
 It's not the fact of weather selling drugs is OK or not. People who commit crimes should be turned in for the crimes they commit. Being with someone and knowing they are committing a crime is also a crime. There was a movie a few years ago I watched. The husband was selling drugs, disappeared before the police raided his home. The wife actually knew nothing of his activity. When the police raided her home they found evidence which he hid that linked him to the sales. They didn't believe she had no idea of his drug activity. She was arrested and charged with conspiracy to sell. In a jury trial she was convicted and sentenced to 26 years in prison. With private investigators working on her side, it still took between 5 and 10 years to gather enough evidence to reopen the case and clear her name of the crime. All that time, her children lived in foster care.
I agree with the other poster, to notify them anonymously. If this was something new that you just found out and wanted to take action would be one thing, but the fact of you knowing while together with him that this was going on may change the laws direction on your end.
Doing it anonymously may protect you from facing charges yourself. Your reasoning is what's off. Instead of wanting to ruin his life, you should be thinking you're getting a drug dealer off the streets so he can't hurt anyone else depending on what he's selling. On my end, going to court to represent children in child abused homes and kids who are being neglected. I don't go in there with the attitude to ruin their parents lives. I do so with the intentions of getting the child to safety and begin developing a plan to get them from being unhappy to happy children. Now the parents are affected, but that's a result of their own poor behavior. It's not an attack from me to them.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 December 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIm a sadist but he's the one who finished with me for someone else and does not care for me or how Im feeling? Ok then. And are u saying that it is ok to sell drugs and that I should just ignore it? You sound just like him. Please dont answer with your stupid advice I dont need to be patronised.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2007): You're a sadist, you want to ruin the guys life, yet you love him so much?
Not likely.
Get over it, leave the poor guy alone.
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reader, rcn +, writes (8 December 2007):
First you say you love him so much. So out of love your willing to ruin his life. Now that doesn't sound like love. Revenge is not a good act. It's not a good habit to get into. Hurting others can only come around and bite you in the rear. Selling drugs is not a good activity either. Being in law myself, you said for the last few months he's been dealing. You can tell the police, but once it comes out that you knew for a few months. I'd be wondering (1) Why wait until now to tell. (2) Why is she telling after he broke her heart (3) Is her intent on the side of justice, or malice (legal term for revenge). If I was in the decision position there, I might charge you as well since you knew about the illegal activity for 3 months, and being in the relationship with him, you're guilty just as much as he is. One gets the charge of distribution of drugs, and you, intent to distribute. I don't think seeking revenge is in your best interest. Focus your time on finding someone you can love that will unconditionally love you back.
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reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (8 December 2007):
 Hey there,
I don't think that you should tell on him just to ruin his life and get sweet revenge. However, drug dealers are never good... maybe you could give an anonymous tip to the police, but if you do, do it because drug dealing is a crime and because your ex-boyfriend shouldn't be doing it.
Good luck, sweetness!
xx India
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