A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am a 16 year old virgin and don't know if I'm ready to have sex or not! I love my boyfriend to death, I've been with him for four months already and he's always asking me if I want to do it but I know I'm not ready. I'm scared if i don't do it with him he'll leave me. I do feel like doing it with him but just to make him happy. Also, another reason is beacause what if I get pregnant, that's something I'm scared to death of! When we're together he treats me really nice but when he's with his friends he sometimes doesn't even notice me. I don't know if he really likes me or wants me just for sex and I don't want to lose him. What should I do?
View related questions:
notice me Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2008): well tbh you've been together 4 months so why not?
i lost mine a few weeks ago and its fine
your not being a slag or nothing and your not really going to be together forever anyways
so just do it and have fun with it
x
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2007): if he's ignoring you in front of his freinds that is a really bad sign. virginity is something you can never get back. if he loved you enough to deserve yours, she shouldn't treat you that way. seriously.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2007): Well I think you should wait till your ready and if all your boyfriend wants is sex then I would leave him. If he really loves you he will understand.
...............................
A
female
reader, flower girl  +, writes (27 June 2007):
 If you are not ready for that then you tell him that and if he does not like it then you tell him where to get off, i was 16 when i met my now husband and i was not ready until about three months into our relationship, he was cool with that and actually had more respect for me for holding on.
He actually told me if i had slept with him when he asked he would not have seen me again.
Take care.xx.
...............................
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (27 June 2007):
 Hi sweetness,
I don't like the sound of this guy... he seems a little too determined to get into your pants. You should be with a man who respects you and let's you set the pace for physical stuff. YOU should be calling the shots here and only doing what you're comfortable with.
I deeply admire your not having had sex already. You said that you don't know if you're ready, and I think that's very insightful of you. You shouldn't have sex until you're absolutely, 100% positive that you're ready.
I waited until I was nineteen and I knew that my guy was the one for my first time because he never pressured me and we waited for several months. Hell, I could've waited for years and he would've been just as happy dating me without sex.
You need a man who will love you with or without sex. You shouldn't feel any pressure at all. Find a guy who you can just have fun with, get to know deeply and both of you can explore your sexualities together without feeling any pressure for sex. When you end up having sex, you'll be doing it for the rest of your life - what's the rush?
I'd lose the guy - not your virginity.
Good luck, sweetness!!
xxIndia
...............................
A
male
reader, joshua19 +, writes (27 June 2007):
 hi im a guy i have a girlfriend who i have had sex with but her and i have only been with eachother now you tell me has your boyfriend already had sex if so then he only wants you for sex take it from a guy thats all he wants you leave him and find a new guy that will respect you ok hope i could help
...............................
A
female
reader, msdgaf910 +, writes (27 June 2007):
 if he loves you he will wait and respect your feelings and how you feel. and about the friends thing is that what you want someone who dont notice you?
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2007): If beeing a virgin means alot to you. Tell him and if he truly loves you, he will wait untill you are ready. Just remember once you give it away you can never have it back!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2007): i highly recommend holding out 'til you're ready. if he loves you and respects you, he'll be willing to wait. if he's not willing to wait, he doesn't love you unconditionally, and he doesn't respect you, so you'll find some time after having sex that it was a big mistake which you'll come to regret.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2007): When the time is right, with the right person. You will know in your heart for sure, no questions asked. Remember to always listen to the voice inside you, because 98% of the time that voice is right!!!! You are an intellegent young lady realizeing that you can get pregnant your first time. Hopefully you have an adult that you can talk to openly. Mabey your mom? that when you feel ready, they will help you get on birth control.Because that voice is telling you he may just want sex, That voice is right!!!! listen to it!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2007): Hon, if you're not ready then don't do it, and certainly don't let him pressure you into it. Nobody should have to do what they're not comfortable with. It's good you're concerned about pregnancy, you're obviously aware of the risks involved. I guess you're wondering if he really cares for you or if he's just interested in you for sex. You need to talk to him and tell him you're not ready for sex yet, and he should understand and respect that if he cares for you. If he doesn't understand and is not ok with that, then maybe you will lose him after all, but if that's the case and he really was only interested in sex then you'd be better off without him anyway.
...............................
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (27 June 2007):
 Well, I think I cannot know whether he wants you for the sex only, either. But I do believe that, if you're not ready for it, you shouldn't do it, no matter what. And, you should never have sex just to make someone happy.
...............................
A
female
reader, dollparts  +, writes (27 June 2007):
 never do it just to make some one happy! if your not ready don't do it it's something that you wont get back and you'll regret it. you do what makes you happy, don't do it because your scared you'll lose him and so what if he goes he wouldn't be worth it anyways would he?
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2007): i highly recommend holding out 'til you're ready. if he loves you and respects you, he'll be willing to wait. if he's not willing to wait, he doesn't love you unconditionally, and he doesn't respect you, so you'll find some time after having sex that it was a big mistake which you'll come to regret.
...............................
|
