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I am thirteen, and have had my period for a while now, I want to use tampons, my mother is strongly opposed to my use of them, what is wrong with tampons at my age?

Tagged as: Health, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (11 September 2008) 10 Answers - (Newest, 30 October 2008)
A female United States age 26-29, *irlygirl2thextreme3 writes:

Well I use tampons secretly behind my moms back. I find pads uncomfortable. I asked when I can use tampons and she tod me when you're WWWWWAAAAAAYYY older! She's afraid I'll hurt myself (im 13!) and that I'm too small to use something "big". AND SHE SAID IF SHE FINDS OUT I'VE BEEN USING TAMPONS SHE'LL KILL ME!!!!!!!!!!! I don't understand...whats wrong with her?? There's nothing wrong with using tampons and I've had plenty experiance with pads! I've had my period 4 2 years. I think its a personal decision whether or not I use tampons. This is driving me crazy!!!!!! HELP!

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A male reader, Pete Kilvert United Kingdom +, writes (30 October 2008):

Toxic Shock Syndrome is very rare, but if you get it you can die, or loose your fingers and toes or have a permanent disability. The reason that young girls should not use tampons is because your immune system has not yet fully developed and you are much more at risk than older women. Major brand tampons contain rayon, which can react with bacteria to produce a toxin (poison) which circulates in the blood and poisons your organs. Alternatives such as all-cotton tampons are safe and there are also re-usable methods such as a cup or a sponge which are safe. Have a look at the website www.tamponalert.org.uk for alternatives and case studies. It could save your life. Whatever you do, you must tell your mum. If you become ill and she thinks that you don't use tampons, vital minutes could be lost. It happens that quick. Take care Pete Kilvert

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2008):

Hi, I am a step mum to a 13 year old teenager. I suggested she started wearing tampons because it becomes an issue when swimming is mentioned and she gets embarrassed when having to tell us she can't go. Her 'real' mother found out that I had given her some to try when she was ready (with instruction leaflet) and she has gone insane. I am now classed as being the worst thing in the world from stupid, dopey, amongst other nasty comments and I make her cringe!!!!!! She even told her daughter it was illegal!!! Whats worst giving her the option with the facts or forcing her to stay on pads??????

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A reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008):

I know how you feel. My mom was the same way for a long time. I started when I was like 10, or so. I think I was 12/13 when I started wearing tampons. I'd give my friend my money for school, and she'd pick me up a box when she'd buy hers. When I was 15 my mom told me she thought I was old enough to start using them, if I wanted too. That she was just worried about it being hurtful and uncomfortable for me. She told me she disliked them and they made her feel ackward as a teen, and that she just didn't want me to go through that.

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A female reader, girlygirl2thextreme3 United States +, writes (12 September 2008):

girlygirl2thextreme3 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

girlygirl2thextreme3 agony auntThank you guys a lot!!!! I really want to talk to my mom but I'm just afraid cuz I know she'll be a mix between mad and surprised. But I also might still use them ut not telly her. You guys helped a ton!!! And I know all about tampons don't worry :)

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A female reader, hlskitten United Kingdom +, writes (11 September 2008):

hlskitten agony auntShe is against them because she doesn't trust that you will remember to change/take the last one out i expect. You could get Toxic shock syndrome.

I would like my daughter to use tampons bacause i happen to believe they are cleaner and more comfortable at an already annoying time! But she is only 11 at the moment and hers haven't even started yet. But obviously to start with i have bought her towels that she has in her room ready. Once she has got used to her periods, and if she wants to, i will see if i think she is sensible enough to remember to change them, and make sure i only buy her the slimmest ones.

You need to convince your mum that you wont forget to change them. I wouldn't mind betting thats what she's worried about.

C xxx

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2008):

Nail on the head, deary.

It's none of your mother's business how you choose to deal with your period.

And what the hell kind of mother doesn't let their kid use a tampon anyway? What is this, the dark ages?

Flynn 24

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (11 September 2008):

Tisha-1 agony auntI just wouldn't discuss it with your mother, it's really not that big a deal how the menstrual fluids are collected in absorbent tissue. I don't understand her either, maybe she has some idea that it affects your virginity or something? Just point out that when you go swimming that the pad isn't workable then. You might try asking her why she's reacting so strongly to something that is rather minor, but then that just might cause more inquisition.

Maybe she's afraid you'll get toxic shock syndrome?

I hate to suggest that you go against your mother, but if you just stop discussing it, she may forget about it for a year or two, and then you'll be old enough, I hope, in her eyes.

Good luck.

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A female reader, Seeker United States +, writes (11 September 2008):

Tampons, if used improperly (i.e. inserted and then left in for way too long) **CAN** (quite rare, but it's possible) cause something called toxic shock syndrome, and this in turn can be fatal. That's the only other thing that I can think of that she might be worried about, aside from what's already been brought up.

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A female reader, lotus mama808 United States +, writes (11 September 2008):

lotus mama808 agony auntI am not sure why your mom has issues with tampons, maybe they resemble a penis in her eyes??? But, it is your body, and your comfert, not hers. When I was young, I wasnt allowed to wear thong underwear untill I was 16, and I can understand that, but tampons? Maybe you mom has a point that I am not picking up on, but there is NOTHING sexual about a tampon. In fact, I find them to be a pain in the butt, but not as much as a messy pad, which can smell funcky after wearing for a couple of hours. YUCK!!! Have you tried explaining to her that you are extrealy uncomfertable wearing pads, and get embarassed when they leak out the sides and get on your pants? I wear tampons during the day and pads in the night and it works out pretty well. I'm suprised she would make you suffer like that. Weird.

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A female reader, SugarCookie United States +, writes (11 September 2008):

I think that your mom doesn't want you to wear a tampon so you dont break your hymen. I started using tampons as soon as i got my period when I was 11 but my parents didn't care. I dont really know how to deal with your mom. It seems like she is being a little unreasonable. tampons really aren't that big. Maybe you should talk to your mom without saying that you want tampons. Just say mom i dont want to fight i just want to know why you are afaid of me using a tampon.

I know I will more than likely get a lot of crap for telling you this but I would continue to use tampons and hide it from your mom. I know that I didn't like pads because of the sound and the smell when they get soaked through so if you are more comfortable with a tampon then use it. Your not doing anything wrong. Just remember to change your tampon often so you dont get an infection.

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