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female
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anonymous
writes: im 18 years old.iv slept with 15 guys.6 were 1 nite standsi lost my virginity aged 144 were relationshipsI only used protection with 5 of these.The rest pulled out.Do u think that it is a lot of people for my age!!????I dont dare have a sti checkup in case i have something-i will be devestated.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 December 2006): I did the same, living life on the wild side, not caring about the risks of unprotected sex until one day I made a list and counted how many men I had slept with without protection, then I thought about how many women they may have slept with without protection and how many partners these women had slept with wothout protection....it goes on and on and on. I went for a STD test for peace of mind and you know what, It turned out I had nothing. I thanked my lucky stars and had protected sex from this day on but I admit I slipped up and again had sex unprotected, so again I went for a STD test and again I was clear...the test is torture....I don't ever want to go again so now it has to be protected and if the guy says "no" then you say "no" to sex until he has a std test to prove he is all clear! :-)
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female
reader, pica +, writes (11 November 2006):
I'm curious as to why you are asking. If aunts say yes, what will happen?? I guess what matters most is the context. Do a lot of them know each other? Did you do it because you wanted the sexual contact itself or because you wanted their approval, their attention or affection? Don't have sex for any of these reasons. And don't have unprotected sex - that's just a disaster waiting to happen.
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female
reader, bonym  +, writes (11 November 2006):
 Yes it is a lot but whether I think its a lot or not makes no difference because what is the definition of a lot? 7, 8, 16 20?? I think for your age having already slept with with 5 men is a lot, but thats MY opinion, my sister on the other hand disagrees. Who is right? Well I think I am right, she thinks she is right.
But back to the point, having sex as a child can cause serious problems later on in life, studies have shown thst sex at very young ages can cause cancer of the lining of the cervix, and other problems as well. Sweetie the fact you are asking this question implies that you know deep down that its a lot. You need to take care of yourself and love yourself then you wont feel the need to have often meaningless sex (one nighters) with different men. Take care.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2006): I don't think it matters how many people you have slept with as long as it was your choice, your happy with what your doing and YOU USED PROTECTION. Please go and get a STD check, i know your scared but if you do have something then it will probably get worse the longer you leave it. As sexybum said some stds if not treated can cause damage and make it so you can never have children, but if you can catch it early then you'll be ok. No matter what the results of the tests are it's better to find out now then later. And having unprotected sex doesn't only risk STDs but unplanned pregnancy. Even if they do pull out you can still fall pregnant. Imagine if you fell pregnant to a one night stand and you couldn't even tell your child who there father is. Please take care of yourself. Don't worry about how many partners you have. As long as your happy and your doing for the right reasons then go for it and enjoy yourself, BUT DO IT SAFELY. Goodluck
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male
reader, Yos  +, writes (11 November 2006):
 That depends what you mean by a lot. Compared to the 'average' yes it is high. Whilst the media (TV, movies, magazines etc) likes to show that 'everyone is doing it', the reality is that this isn't the case. You are probably somewhere in the top 5 to 10% of girls in terms of sexual partners. One of the largest surveys done recently showed that the average number of lifetime sexual partners for men and women is 9 (this is for people of all ages). It is different for your generation however, the numbers start to drop the older people get as for previous generations there was less pressure to have sex, lots of it, and early, than there is now. Promiscuity has become 'cool' recently. Personally I find this unfortunate, but that is just me.
Having said that, if its making you happy and you have no problems with it, then its not a problem. It is perfectly possible to have lots of sexual partners and have a great time doing it, and later in life settle down into a great long term relationship with no problems. You can tell if you are ok or not by asking yourself this simple question: "do you feel good about it?"
If on the other hand you are not happy with it, then it is too many. If this is the case you should take some time out from sex and think about what it is that is driving your behaviour and what it is you are looking for from all these men. Councelling or therapy will help you with this.
And whatever you do, start using condoms! Otherwise you will end up with an STD, and some of these STDs are incurable and can stay with you the rest of your life. At the very least be safe.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 November 2006): I dont think that number is high, probably normal for kids in our generation. My guess is your cuter than average and you probably should not let boys pressure you into not using protection. No matter how much you want to have sex, you don't want the STD that the guy might be giving you as a one time "wam bam thank you mam".
I regular pap test is NECESSARY!!! not only to check for STDs but as well to ensure you are not developping any abnormalities or problems in your oh so very important body.
A doctor should be giving you this in your anual check up.
So many small benine (harmless) things can be found as well as something major that could affect your life, and those of the ones you love!
As for being devastated if you have an STD, don't worry, most things are curable (not all without sequels) exept AIDS and HERPES, both of which you should have symptoms of.
I hope this helps!!
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (11 November 2006):
 Don't worry about the number - the past is the past and you can't change it. Only learn to accept it. You're fine in that regard.
However, you REALLY need to start getting on that protection. It's not the 70's anymore, and STI's are NO JOKE. they happen and they might have happened to you. No matter how "devestating" the news might be, you need to know or it could just get worse. Who knows? It could become fatal.
Find a Planned Parenthood, who keep everything confidential. They're all very sweet and will be nice to you. They won't judge you.
sexybum is right, after you get tested you'll probably feel a lot better. Much more relieved.
Good luck, sweetness.
Love, India
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2006): hey im nearly 18 and iv only slept with 2! i personaly think its a LOT! but its up to you, its your life have fun ;) lol but you defo should get a STD test!
take care x
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female
reader, Sexybum +, writes (10 November 2006):
 I think that you should for a test.... I'm sure that any one on this web site can tell you how nervous they were and sacred that they were before they went for their first STD tests.
It's not really that bad... You don't the person who does it and then once it's done you will fell so releived.. It is important as well because if you have caught soemthing than it needs to be treated before it's too late.
For example clamydia can stop you from EVER being able to have children if you don't get it treated and AIDS can kill you!! I'm sorry if I've scared you but it is true...
If you are startingto feel paranoid about the no.of people you have slept with then pherhaps it is because you are paraanoid because you haven't been tested... Get tested and your paranoia may well go away.............
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2006): Well its best that you do have a check up just incase.
But dont worry too much about the number of people you have slept with.
Its in the past now anyway if you dont want to keep doing it then just control yourself woman!!. lol.
I have been with a similar number of guys and im not much older than you. I think I'm just a really sexual person.
Ok
XX
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