A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid,I always make fun of my girlfriend’s class and her middle class dressing and stuffs . Actually she is from middle class and I am from extremely rich family and we are in a relationship for the last four years and will make it official soon. She used to just smile whenever I would do that in the past but for the last one month , she’s been taking it hard and last night she told me if didn’t mend my way quickly she would dump me. Will she really dump me or she is just bluffing? And how come I should get rid of this habit which seems to have got stuck in my mouth firmly? . Suggestions from you guys would be truly appreciated here. Thank you all in advance ! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Battista  +, writes (21 September 2011):
It seems like you are more bothered about making your gf aware of how much richer than her you are, than about caring for your gf's feelings. I am sure that every time you make a "joke" about these things she thinks you are a complete idiot and is sick of your condescendion and patronisation. If you've been doing it for 4 years and have seen nothing wrong with it until now then I am certain she is completely sick of your behaviour and have no doubt that she will dump with soon.
I don't understand what sort of help you are looking for to be honest. Would you make fun of someone because of their race? Would you make fun of someone's disability? No, of course you wouldn't. So why do you feel the need to make fun of someone's financial background? Stop deliberately hurting your girlfriend's feelings before it's too late.
A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (21 September 2011):
 Your girlfriend isn't bluffing. The reason she used to just smile wasn't because of how funny you were or how envious she was, but because of how foolish you made yourself look. Your behaviour makes those of means cringe as well. Every group has its pecking order and the financially elite are no different. 'Old money' is at the top and 'new money' at the bottom. The Rockefellers and the Vanderbilts aren't seen in the company of Brittany Spears or Snoop Dogg for a reason.Unless you're in business negotiations, it is considered vulgar to discuss money or draw attention to wealth or the lack of it (yours or anyone else's). This ill bred behaviour is usually associated with 'new money' or 'no money'. People who have it don't advertise it. People who don't have it or only acquired it recently do.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (21 September 2011):
 It's well-to-do people like you who make people of lesser means cringe. From your description of the situation, I sense that you would like your boorish behaviour to be validated.... IF that's what you'd like, then find a boorish contemporary to do that for you... you and he (or, she) can reinforce your behaviour, then sit around and ask one-another.... "What do we care what the little people think?"OR.... you can develop some real skills at being a humble person who doesn't think that his means is a license to act like an a*s....Your choice. Good luck to the poor girl who has fallen for you. She deserves better.....
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A
female
reader, nana.g +, writes (21 September 2011):
 Yes you should totallg get rid of this habit or she will dump you. If you care for her why ever would you make fun of the way she dresses and the way you put it, just seems like you feel shes below you just because she is not as wealthy as you. Money isnt everything in life you know, so unless you want to loose her you best loose that jerkie attitude.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2011): all im going to say is that when a woman is fed up ... there is not much you can do about it ... continue to do that and SHE WILL DUMP YOU ... smh I would if i was her!
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A
female
reader, Koala Bear  +, writes (21 September 2011):
 ABSOLUTELY! She is not bluffing and I don't know what makes you think it is okay to make fun of less fortunate people, let alone your own girlfriend.Matters such as money and status shouldn't be a joke. What she wears is what she can afford and most likely what she LIKES. Initially she probably thought you were joking when you made fun of her which is why she smiled. If you don't change soon she may realize that this is a serious personality flaw you have and a life lesson that you have yet to learn. Clothing and accessories means nothing when defining a person.You can give her gifts you know. But only as an act of love. If you buy her something nice hopefully the thought going through your head is "this amazing woman deserves the best I can give her". Not "What she wears is so middle class".
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A
male
reader, The Realist +, writes (21 September 2011):
 You have a bad habit stuck with you. You are making her feel below you which is a huge problem in a relationship. She has most likely been brought up where you treat everyone equally while you are thinking that money puts you a head of her. If you can't think of any reasons why this is wrong then yes she will dump you in time because she will never see your way of life.
She wants to see you thankful for what you have while being a better person in showing that you care about people regaurdless of there status. Think of it in her position when you are with her family. She wants you to be part of that family not the outsider with money.
Trust me money will never buy you any love that really means anything and unless you change you will find this out with her.
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A
male
reader, EyesofJag +, writes (21 September 2011):
Are you just kidding with her though? It sounds like you're being condescending to her because she's not as rich as you. You've been joking around for years like this and maybe she's just had enough. She is communicating with you that she's had enough. I say stop it, even if you don't mean to hurt her with her jokes. I don't think she's bluffing on this one.Communicate that you mean no harm, of course, if you really are just joking. It's not so much the classes you guys are in, but the attitude of being from a very wealthy family.Anyway, communication is key. :-)
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