A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi guys, I know this isn't the usual kind of question but i've been on this site before and always been impressed with the advice and guidance given so i thought i'd try it out. I've spent the past 3 years doing a degree that i shouldn't have been doing. I went for Psychology because it was the one that sounded most interesting and to be honest i just wanted my freedom away from my family. I didn't chose it because i wanted a career in Psychology. What i want to do is write. I've been to see the academic advisor at university and she referred me to the head of creative writing. He's now advised me to withdraw from my current studies and come back next year to start Creative Writing. All that is great and its what i really and truly want to do. However the problem is my parents. They want me to finish this degree (and that i completely understand) and they don't think that Creative Writing is something i should do. I can't get across how much i dislike the degree I'm doing. To say i don't want to finish it makes it sound so childish and so pathetic like i don't want to finish my dinner or something. I'm miserable. I have been for the past 2 years. I can't bring myself to even finish the degree next year. Every time i go to a seminar and see everyone else understanding and excelling in class it makes me feel even worse in myself. I just don't like it and i don't enjoy any aspect of it. I've always had a problem with numbers and not been able to read them correctly. Its only since I've been to see this academic advisor that i was informed that i could have dyslexia for numbers. For two years i've been struggling through thinking i've been stupid. But it turns out i might not be. I've always been able to write well and i enjoy it so much. The problem is i have no idea what to do. I could carry on and finish Psychology or i could withdraw now and come back in a year to do Creative Writing. What i want to do is take a year to clear my head and save up some money so i can go back and go for my education properly. How am i going to tell my parents? They will be so disappointed in me. I have no idea what i should do. Maybe i should just solider on and do the degree, and that way everyones happy. I would appreciate any opinions and any advice you guys have!! Thanks!Daisy
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2013): I think what you should do depends on who is paying for your education. If your parents are paying, then they have every right to dictate what it is you should do. If you dont' want to follow their wishes, then fine - dont' accept their financial help anymore. Pay your own way (get jobs, get student loans, get scholarships, or combinatinons of all three). Or, if you want to continue receiving their financial help, then just suck it up and finish the degree, it's not going to be forever. view it as a challenge. Anyone can do something that they enjoy. But sticking it out through something you dislike, is a test of your mental endurance and to some degree it builds your character since in life you often will have to do things you don't like (like unpleasant job assignments for example). this psychology degree won't be forever, it has a finite time. After you have completed it then you are free to do what you really want to do, you can always go back and do Creative Writing later on. But if you're paying for your own education, then you should do what feels right for you now. since you hate the psychology course so much, it makes no sense to continue wasting your money on something you hate. withdraw now, and transfer to creative writing at the next opportunity.
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (3 July 2013):
 I just finished up my double major in Psychology and Theater. I don't remember what idiotic part of me decided that Psychology would be a good idea, because as it turns out - I suck at it when it comes to the statistics, and the formulaic style writing. I imagine that as a creative writer, you must absolutely HATE writing in Psych, which leaves you zero room for creativity. That's a huge reason why I can't stand Psychology. But, now I proudly have two degrees. One for a subject doesn't interest me in the least, and one in my passion.
But, like everyone said - you are a year away. Finish the degree. Don't have all the time be a waste. If creative writing is your dream, double major and when you get out in the real world, it will be to your benefit to have that extra degree; to have something to fall back on while waiting for that dream job to come in. Psychology will also make you a much better writer, as it has made me a much better thespian. We both have passions in fields that require a deep understanding of people, and having a degree in Psychology gives us a hell of an edge on the competition. Trust me, it looks great to potential employers to see that BA in Psych on the ol' resumé.
Persevere, but don't abandon hopes of creative writing. Remember the Psychologist Abraham Maslow's theory on self-actualization?
"A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself. What a man can be, he must be.” - Maslow laying down some solid theory.
Each one of us must discover our own potential and seek out the experiences that allow us to fulfill it. See? Who says that Psychology didn't teach me anything?
Best of luck, sweetness - from one Shouldn't-Have-Been-A-Psych-Major-But-Here-We-Are soul to another.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (2 July 2013):
 I have a degree in psych and I do computer security for a living.. my area of interest is social engineering. BTW I started out as an elementary education major (I was going to teach)
I think that you should continue with the psych degree and add creative writing as a dual major.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (2 July 2013):
 Only one more year ? And you have done 3 ? No, soldier on. Finish this degree, THEN you can take a sort of sabbatical to save up as much as possible and enroll in Creative Writing. You'd be only one year late ,compared to your plans, in completing your second degree, but it's one year that will make the difference, since it will have got you an officially recognized study title- and officially marketable skills. ( Do not discount that- I wish you all the success you can ever want as a writer, but- do you actually know many people who make their living as writers ? )
" The travel from Kamakura to Kyoto lasts 12 days, if you give up at the eleventh, when will you be able to admire the moon over the capital ? " ( Nichiren Daishonin )
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (2 July 2013):
 I'm doing a PhD in Sociology OP and I love it but there was a time in my life where I was actually saddled with studying science because my parents wanted me to become an engineer. Can you even believe how diverse the two are? Needless to say I hated science from my very core and every single day of living through those days was an ordeal for me. I was depressed, I couldn't relate to the other students, I performed miserably in class and overall it was the worst phase of my life. My parents have NEVER been the pushy kinds and they always thought that it would be best for me to study science because that's what's expected of all the good students, at least where I live. Thank God opinions are now changing but anyway that's another tangent.
But as much as I hated it OP, I finished the degree and then took up Sociology and I've never looked back since then.
My advice to you would be to stick it out, finish what you're doing and then take up creative writing so at least would wont lose out on the years that you've already invested. However, if you ABSOLUTELY hate your subject and you feel that you're not doing justice to either yourself or your studies, then leave and pursue creative writing. Ultimately its about *you* and your life and if this is what you want, then go for it. But take a firm decision OP and stand by it even if it means facing your parents and tears and protestations.
All the best to you :)
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (2 July 2013):
 Hi
Are your parents funding you through Uni or do you have a student loan? If you have a loan then I can't imagine your parents being too upset as your paying - provided you end up with a job/career of some sort that makes you happy, they will be happy.
It could be you just need a break, a year off, then *definitely* go back and finish the degree. Dyslexia is a pain but a good Uni will support you, give extra help if your tested and shown to have it. It's manageable.
What career DO you want, do you have any idea? Where would you realistically see a creative writing degree taking you?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2013): Hi! I strongly advise you to stick with it. I'm 22 and regret SO much that I didn't go to uni- I just couldn't decide what I wanted to do n didn't want to be in debt. Now however I've discovered exactly what I'm good at- and when i look for an entry level job in this field I just find Its dame near impossible to compete with people who have degrees-- you'd be amazed at the careers that require a degree. Primary school teaching, for example needs a full degree, it's not like you can just do a course. A degree is a degree, it doesn't matter what subject it's in, unless you want a career in something like law/ medicine( very intense, competitive careers that a lot of people don't have the mental capacity for) I'm telling you you haven't yet found your niche, but you will- when you have you may well find it needs a degree. Any degree will likely give you an edge. The thing is if you drop out of this, You're probably guna have to pay the current fee to start a different course, which is over £30,000 fees ALONE! 100% creative writing is not worth changing courses for. My friend has a degree in fine art- she's now decided she wants to be a teacher. She hasn't got a degree in teaching but she's doing this agency tutoring work, and has just been offered to teach a level graphics at a private school- what if you decide you want to be a teacher, you will NEED that degree. Please do everything you can to stick it out, because I really think you'll regret it if you don't- I wish I'd gone then, as it's just too expensive now. you'll likely want a completely different thing in a few years, you're still exploring and haven't found your niche. How long have you actually got of the degree left? If its less than a year you have nothing to lose. Good luck! Xx :)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2013): Good evening Daisy! Or at least from my part of the world. I've been in your situation a ago, so maybe my experience could help. I started out doing a degree that I thought I would love and make a career out of it. Though it wasn't my first choice, due to the lack of any other possibilities at that time I went for it thinking it's going to be alright.Two years later I found myself annoyed, disgusted and just plain miserable with it. The third year was even worst in every way possible, physically, mentally, socially, you name it. The whole degree would last for 6 years, but by the time I got to the second half of the third year, I felt that I was finished. Don't get me wrong, I have always been a hard worker and had constant high grades no matter how I felt, but my happiness was going down the drain so to say.So I took a risk and decided that no matter what other people would think of my decision, I was going to change my course, and by doing that, ending up in a totally different country as well. And I did, I got accepted, packed my bags and moved. It wasn't an easy decision to take, but in the end I ended up doing what I always wanted to do course wise and career wise, and all I could say is that I'm happy that I did it.Now, each and everyone of us has a different background, a different story, a different scenario and no one can give you the "right" answer regarding what you need to do. I hope it helps though.If changing your course is what it takes to make you happy then all I can say is that that's the only thing that matters.I wish you the best of luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2013):
Oo sweetie, come get a cuddle lets have tea and cake .. And with that I mean its never as bad as you think in your head ..
First of my advice is you buy a cake something real tasty and go and see your mum and dad .. Say you need to talk and just be as open as you are here start with the number problem and that uni are recognising it as dyslexia .. Psychology is alot of number work quanative and qualities studies etc .. So start there.. Say you've been battling as you don't want them to be disappointed but you feel your marks will reflect your number disability and your just can't get your head back into it .. I think it's amazing how you have went and spoke with your academic advisor and you can explain that you have a plan set in motion why not say you might also apply it with journalism ?? . I think they just want you to have a career ..
And writing though profitable for some is not for everyone .. So have a back up even English literature or into teaching English .. These kind of options . Don't be frighted to say to mum and dad I bet though they will be slightly disappointed they wi be proud that you can come to them and say . I know I would be if it were mine and we would work out something . .
You have to be happy and content and if this is something you strongly need to go.. Then get the talk over and done with .. Show them your plan if the other things interest you fling them in as well.. Won't hurt ..
Take care sweetie, chin up .. X
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2013): You only have one more year. Persevere, trust me it's worth it
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2013): Who's life is it.. Your or your parents?? Yours. Leave and go back next year, one of the worst things in life is doing a job that you don't like and if you complete this degree then that is what you are going to do.
As for your parent's tell them the way you feel and that your mind is made up. One thing about parents it that they will always forgive. Give it a few months once you tell them and they will be fine.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (1 July 2013):
I would say leave now and do what you want to do. The most dangerous thing that someone can do is live for someone else. If you're doing something that someone else wants you to do, and you don't want to do it, you'll just end up miserable and you'll waste time.
Yes, I'm sure your parents will initially be disappointed, but I'm sure that they wouldn't want you to be miserable for the rest of your life, full of regret.
Do what you want to do with your life. That's what it's for. Perhaps if more people did that, there might be less unhappiness!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2013): Is there an option for making it a Dual degree or a double major ? This way, you can bring in satisfaction to your family and as well as you. This will also open doors to you in two different areas and your job prospects will also increase...
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2013): I think u should finish this degree then do creative writing. You know like finishing your veggies to enjoy your dessert.But if you really cant handle it,sit down with your parents and tell them how you feel. They might be unhappy but your happiness is what matters in the end. And if they love you they will support your decision. Its not as if you want to quit school, you just want to pursue a course you like.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2013): Well... I have a degree in writing and it has done me no good in the real world, so let me be frank with you and say that if you're looking to earn a living with the degree you obtain, Creative Writing is about as useless as degree as you can get. Ironically enough I knew halfway through MY degree that it was a poor choice in terms of practicality, and had nothing to do with the field I ended up pursuing, but I stuck it out for reasons I'll explain in a moment.Advice to you: if I were in your shoes I would tough it out and finish what you started. You probably didn't like every single class you had in high school (or the UK equivalent) either, but you wanted the diploma so you stuck it out, right? You can always go back and study a second subject (your general ed stuff should pretty much be covered with the existing degree you would have in hand) but at least this way you'll have something that CAN pay your bills, if you need it to.Prospective employers in any field will also look more favorably on a candidate who has finished what they started. Having "most of " a degree in something would be a red flag to a potential employer that perhaps you don't have the follow-through to effectively handle assignments. On the other hand, going to any employer with your completed degree in hand, even an irrelevant one, shows you at least are capable of applying yourself to something and staying focused enough to finish it.Good luck :)Good luck
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