Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, JALOVER  +, writes (14 April 2012):
HelloLook in the internet about Candaulism, or Candalagnia. The issue about him not wanting to see you doing so, might be because he is not 100% into that and wants to give you some room and "privacy" about that. Ask him directly.I told my wife to do the same, and I wanted to watch. She did it, but asked me to do it by her self, so I let her go alone. When it was time for me to go and pick her up, I asked them to allow me to whatch the "last part" he gave her a terrific oral sex, but felt so cold deep in my heart to watch the head of this other guy between my wife's legs. I was devastaded at that point, but when we were alone at home and she shared with me her experience (she says that was the best sex of her life) I got really exited and had sex she and I. Maybe is what your husband is looking for, to avoid being hurt. Ask him directly.
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female
reader, Unsurebabe  +, writes (13 April 2012):
 I am asked of the same and do it, it involves me allowing him to sleep with other woman. At times it can become very frustrating, and arouse questions of all sorts, it's trouble but still for me been manageable, and help in trust because there's no need to hide it if there's discussion about it, also has been a problem in thinkingq you should screw any guy to please him. If you do ever do this, just be sure of yourself and know what he expects if anything in return .
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (11 April 2012):
 OH well fantasy is perfectly FINE..
give it to him with both guns then sweetie...
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female
reader, natasia  +, writes (11 April 2012):
 I knew it was just a male way of suggesting sort of what he wanted but not saying exactly!! : )
And glad he has explained himself now.
Poor guy. If only he knew what we'd been saying about him ...
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female
reader, Foot-In-My-Mouth  +, writes (11 April 2012):
 Glad it has all ended well.
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female
reader, POPPYSOCKS1 +, writes (10 April 2012):
POPPYSOCKS1 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi all, just spoken to him and he has admitted its al in his head, he said he would be gutted if i actually did it. likes the pretending though x
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female
reader, POPPYSOCKS1 +, writes (10 April 2012):
POPPYSOCKS1 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everyone. I certainly will not be playing his games x
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female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (10 April 2012):
 In reading your other answer, I'm a bit puzzled. You described your relationship with your boyfriend (husband now?) as being amazing. Is there a reason you simply can't ask him what has changed? He broke up with you in June of last year and then wanted you back after you went on dating sites. What was the reason for the breakup? Is it fully resolved? Is it possible that this issue is what is behind his peculiar request?
My immediate thought is that he wants to play around himself, so he's getting you to do it first.
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male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (10 April 2012):
 I would feel insulted if my wife cared so little about me that she had no problem sharing me with someone else.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2012): It's known as a cuckold fantasy; I know two couples who are into this stuff. This one guy is a a hardcore cuckold and he has allowed me to have sex with his wife on several occasions while he watched, but I backed out of it after a while because after a while that's all he wanted to do. He is a bit weird. She was 22 when this started and I was in my late 30's so it was a major turn on for me....I just had to perform while being watched.
This other couple was more adventurous along the lines of swinging once in a while and having fun. I had sex with her as well, but it became a major problem because our chemistry is so off the charts awesome when we're together - we can't keep our hands off each other - I still see her on occasion ; )
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 April 2012):
It’s cuckolding and some men are sexually aroused by it. I would not buy into it…. Too many issues and problems….
have you asked him WHY he wants this?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2012): It's called trouble...big trouble...in a real marriage. I have read short erotic stories about this stuff, but didn't think people actually did it...nothing should shock me anymore lol.
Don't go there and secondly ask him WHY he wants you to do this...seriously, don't do it.
This has BAD written all over it...I would have some serious doubts about the motivation behind this....yikes
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2012): Instead of asking here, why not sit him down with a bottle of wine (this is good to loosen tongue and make conversation easier) and start talking to him.
He could have many reasons for this - but ask him what it's about and what he gets out of it. Make sure you appear non-threatening and non-judgemental.
In a relationship it's better not to pretend his feelings don't exist or they manifest themselves in other (usually nastier) ways.
And try not to be jealous. A little bit of jealousy is healthy, but not too much. Once you get to the underlying reasons for his questions you will develop a deeper understanding of your partner.
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male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (10 April 2012):
 I googled "cuckhold" and found this link which might be of interest to you:
http://psychology-forum.com/general-psychology-forum/psychology-of-a-cuckold/?PHPSESSID=3e7b1c63cd5375b274c755827082b581
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female
reader, ToHereKnowsWhen  +, writes (10 April 2012):
 In a word, it's called strange. Why not get him to do it with the same man and you can compare notes?
Is he feeling guilty for some reason?
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 April 2012):
 Well it could be:
Narratophilia: Telling dirty stories is sexually arousing.
o perhaps:
Cuckholding ?
Sorry for double post btw.. I seem to stutter today.
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 April 2012):
Well it could be:
Narratophilia: Telling dirty stories is sexually arousing.
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female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (10 April 2012):
 Your having sex with another man will effectively give him permission to have sex with another woman without guilt, he will be able to point the finger and say "you did it, so why can't I?"
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female
reader, POPPYSOCKS1 +, writes (10 April 2012):
POPPYSOCKS1 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone. I have no idea of doing it but am keeping my eye on him. He has never asked this before.
I was told by a friend it had a name but cant find it anywhere. i just wanted to read up on it so I could see if there was anything of interest as to why he has aksed. Thanks everyone.
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female
reader, person12345 +, writes (10 April 2012):
 "Its called the end of the marriage."
Yup.
Even if he thinks this is going to be hot, he's almost certainly going to punish you for it. When most couples add other people to their sex lives, it doesn't work the way it does in the fantasy. In most cases, the jealousy becomes overwhelming and tears apart the relationship. While in his head this sort of second-hand voyeurism (he's getting off on the idea of knowing private illicit sexual details that should be secret) probably sounds very hot, in real life you've just cheated on him. His head, he's in control. In real life, he isn't.
You can try to make up stories (do not base these on real life) so when he does inevitably get jealous you can tell him it's fake, but honestly it's probably better to leave this one alone.
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female
reader, natasia +, writes (10 April 2012):
Erm, I don't know what it's called ... looking for excitement? Or, as someone said, practising detachment?
Do you want to have sex with another man?
It is a fairly strange thing for him to want, because usually he would want to be there, to be in control - but if you are on your own, he would have no control. Odd.
Or maybe he just wants you to make it up. Tell him 'yes, I did it ...' and give him all the details. Maybe this is his oblique (male) way of suggesting you make up some stories, to turn him on.
?
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female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (10 April 2012):
 Its called the end of the marriage.
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female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (10 April 2012):
 Good call Honeypie. It sure does sound like a setup to me also.
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 April 2012):
Um, setting you up so he can cheat himself?
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