A
male
age
30-35,
*ndigo
writes:My girlfriend is very open-minded sexually and said that we could have a threesome if I wanted. I said I did but I didn't know how we could find a partner.Fast forward a couple weeks, I met a girl who was flirty and obviously into me. Invited her to a party with me and my girlfriend. I know she likes me, but I don't know if she would like a threesome. How do I ask her about it without it sounding awkward? I don't want to sound rude.
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female
reader, Liza999  +, writes (9 September 2010):
 I think it would be best for your girlfriend to have a connection with the other girl rather than you first. This prevents alot of possible jealousy and ambiguity in the roles. Trust me, make it a plan of your girlfriends to find the girl and it'll prevent alot of heartache and embaressment.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2010): Point blank just ask her. Does she know you have a girlfriend? And if she does then it's obvious that you either want her in your threesome or that you are a cheating bastard. Before you engage in your threesome make sure you don't have real feelings for this girl, or it will make your life hell
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A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (9 September 2010):
Hi there. Threesomes can go two ways. Two guys and one girl. Or, Two girls and one guy.
Although it might sound like a good idea as a novelty factor, in the end it probably would cause problems. It definitely, would encourage unfaithfulness on the part of the one who had two of the opposite sex (1 guy and 2 girls for instance).
It would put doubt into your girlfriend's mind to the point where she probably wouldn't trust you again.
You say this other girl is really into you, so if you went ahead with the threesome, you might just be tempted to see this third person behind your girlfriend's back. Then you are two-timing. The third person would get jealous of your girlfriend, and if your girlfriend found out, she'd be very angry. She would probably end it with you.
So being rational, this is something to think about very seriously. It depends on what sort of relationship you have with your girlfriend. She might have said that it would be ok, but when it comes to the crunch it might be a whole different ball game.
Also, think about how you would like your relationship with your girlfriend to go in future - are you thinking wedding bells at some time?
You will need to tell your girlfriend about this other girl, and see what she says about it. And for that matter, have you discussed how the threesome will be? Two women and one man, OR Two men and one woman? This needs to be clarified before anything happens.
Although it sounds like fun, it could cause more trouble than it's worth. If you really like your girlfriend, you need to consider the possibility that your relationship might just end as a direct cause of the threesome you are proposing.
Food for thought. Hope this helps. Best wishes.
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A
male
reader, gigolojone  +, writes (9 September 2010):
 Ask her out on a date and while out there,introduce the topic in a friendly manner,not intended towards her but rather as a story and see what she thinks of it. Ask her if she has ever tried that sort of thing...that is depending on her response to the story and if she turns out to be as open minded as you and your girlfriend are then bingo...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2010): First, I’d ask the girlfriend if she really wanted to be involved in that with you. She might have felt pressured at the time and wanted to please you, so of course she would go along with it. Discuss her boundaries, because that’s a pretty big thing to happen in a relationship. The last thing you want to happen is to have her start crying in the middle of orgasm and then start running out of the room leaving you there wondering what just happened. Warning: emotional fits may occur.
The other girl! Have you kept in touch with her? Do you have anything in common with her or do you talk to her about stuff? If it’s some random chick that winked at you, I think you’re in the clear to be as raw as possible and flat out ask if she would be interested. The worst thing that could happen would be her turning you down, and going home to have awesome sex with your girlfriend and trying again the next night. Nothing to lose in that situation. If she’s more “friendly” on you, I would first inform her that you have a girlfriend… but you’re interested in her. I would invite her out to dinner, tell her you have something you’d like to ask her but there’s completely no pressure at all. Peak her curiosity and see if that’s something she’d enjoy doing.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2010): Does your girlfriend like her? Because your first priority is the girl you already have. It doesn't matter how sexually open minded you are--people having feelings.
If the girls like each other enough to get down and dirty, maybe first bring up the question, would she ever do it. If she says yes and the timing is right, ask. If she says no, don't assume she's just embarrassed. Drop it and leave it.
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