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How do you find a decent man? One who doesn't just want you for sex?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Dating, Sex, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 September 2008) 8 Answers - (Newest, 16 September 2008)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, *achakaRoni writes:

How do you find a decent man? who doesnt just want you for sex?

How do you know when they are telling the truth and not just trying to get into your knickers? coz I dont have a clue, and neither does anyone else I know. Please help, Im starting to feel like I shouldn't trust any man because I dont know if they are speaking the truth at all.

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A female reader, CNKlives United States +, writes (16 September 2008):

simple...don't sleep with him for at least 2 months. If he just wants sex, he will be gone, if he waits, he likes you..try it.

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A female reader, hello kitty United Kingdom +, writes (16 September 2008):

GIRL GO TO CHURCH good luck

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2008):

You know it's strange because I always keep wondering why women end up with total jerks.

I say keep away from those that flatter too much, I dunno if it's just me but women seem to fall too easily at this kind of stuff.

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A female reader, hlskitten United Kingdom +, writes (16 September 2008):

hlskitten agony auntGood instincts, good luck, not handing your body to them on a whim, and hanging out and getting to know them.

If you get caught out after that, then you're either an extremely bad judge of character or extremely unlucky!

C xxxxx

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A reader, anonymous, writes (16 September 2008):

I disagree with the idea that you should test them. From personal experience, I think the best way to find a guy who doesn't just want sex is to take the time to build up a close emotional relationship first, get to know everything about each other, spend time together. In this time you take to build the relationship hold of for sex until you feel intimate with the guy, tell him you want to wait for the right time so it will be special for both of you and will mean more. If he respects your wishes and waits until you're ready, hes in it for more than sex. If he pesters you or tries to persuade you to do it, hes in it for sex. Good luck hun xxx

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A male reader, Joey 2008 United Kingdom +, writes (16 September 2008):

Theres plenty of nice guys out there hun! Im one of them sorry if that sound big headed, if i met a girl id wanna get to know them, before sex is an issue, with me ex gf we didnt do anything for 5 months as we wanted to get to know each other ad love each other first, this felt really special. so dont rush and ull find sum1 :) xx

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A female reader, sappygirl United States +, writes (16 September 2008):

sappygirl agony auntthe best way is to test them. Wait as long as you can to have sex with them. And look at what they do, not what they say.(action speaks louder than words) All guys will want to get in your pants, but it's the nice/decent ones who really wants to get to know you will take their time to get to know you.

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A female reader, miss know it all United Kingdom +, writes (16 September 2008):

First of all dont look for a decent man cos it will take longer let him come to you and it might happen quicker than what you think.

From previous experience if he tries to get you into bed DONT because if you do that some men find that unattractive and cheap even though they are still getting what they want. I wouldnt trust any man at all until you have been on a few dates with a man you really like, you can tell when a man is genuine because he is very touchy feely, feels comfortable in your presence and can act shy. The ones who just want to get you in the sack dont listen to a word you say and just want the evening to hurry up to the good part.

If i were you i would start enjoying life for instance going out clubbing, meeting up with friends etc etc and then just see what the future holds your still young so enjoy your life until you feel the time is right. I wish you the best of luck and hopefully the right man is just round the corner

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