A
female
age
30-35,
*mmaxlouise
writes:How can i get him to leave his wife for me? im 17 and hes 40 and really need ideas?he sees me whenever he can get away from his wife, and promises to take me shopping, and he calls me princess and beautiful, we have sex alot in his car, he has 2 children of 7 and 3, and obviously i wouldnt stop him seeing them Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): Amen. Thank you female anon.
A
male
reader, lionelhutz  +, writes (19 July 2009):
Are you serious???
Read the other responses. Unless he's mentioned it, he's not going to leave his wife. And even if he does, how long do you think it will last? Only until he finds someone else he enjoys spending time with.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): if he can't afford a hotel room - leave him.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): kindly post this in response to the original posters many post:dear emma. i think you have posted here almost 10 times (?), i have read everything about your affair with your married man - how you have been doing it in his car, his wife smelt your perfume in his car after you two did it. he is a lawyer. he buys you expensive gifts and you enjoy all the luxuaries of being a mistress. you want him to leave his wife. you two want to have sex in his marital bed- emma the list goes on. yet again you have "tormented" us with another of your posts. this is becoming a joke to you. you are playing games on this site. why are you continuosly posting here. WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM US? you know you are not going to change. you know that you are playing a game. the aunts and uncles here have been giving you valualbe advice and you have been spitting on our faces. i said before that you need help. darling, please, please take this advice. you are emotionally unstable and you need to seek professional advice. please to the moderators this woman has been a regular "faker". she has been continously posting details of her affair with this older married man. is there any way to verify the authenticity of her posts. i know that she is getting high reading all our responses but surely she needs to be cautioned about the way she uses this site. she is yet again "using" the aunts and uncles here by posting these stories about her sex antics with this older man. it seems as though she is taunting the people on this site with her sex issues with this married man. enough is enough.
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A
male
reader, baddogbj  +, writes (19 July 2009):
 Sweetheart, if you believe no one else here then take from me as as a 40 year old guy who cheats on his wife with younger women, HE IS NOT GOING TO LEAVE HIS WIFE FOR YOU. And, if he did, it would last about 6 months at the very most.
Obviously I am in no position to judge either you or him but, at most, treat this as a fun short term thing that you will remember with fondness and amusement as you get older. If you cause the break up of his marriage you will make a mess of his life, his wife's life, their childrens lives and also your life.
Also, frankly, if you are going to be mistress to a man 23 years older than you - try to find a wealthy one or at least someone who is prepared to fork out for a decent hotel room. Having sex in the back of his car is just cheap.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): Honey, you are young, he is old...established with a wife & kids. He has a home...that you will NEVER be apart of, and he will never leave a grown woman, his "Wife", the mother of his innocent kids for a "Child" like you, who has nothing to offer him but her legs. You are nothing more to him than a fling in a car regardless of what he has told you. He has lived his life for 40 long years, you have barely seen the sun rise & sun set. Don't settle for car sex & gifts, you are worth more than that, you can get a job & buy yourself an outfit. Focus on YOURSELF, your education, your future career, your heart, Find out what you want to be in life. Let this man go to his wife & family, live your life, you don't stand a chance with a him!
I'm saying this from experience, I have been in the same place you are, and I can tell you that it not worth the hurt shame & danger. Run! It is SOOOOOOOO unwise for you to even think about taking another 's husband, it is so unwise for him to use you & put you in such a dangerous place. You could end up hurt for wanting to do something like that, what if this mans wife finds out about you & comes after you? Don't let this man use you, you are young sweetheart, go live your life! Please life your life...without that man!
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): What do you suppose would happen if he actually did leave her? What do you invision? Do you see yourself strolling side by side with him through the park or the grocery store? Do you see yourself proud to be by the side of a forty year old in public, do you see him unshamed as well, to be in an illegal relationship.. uncaring of being a ceritified petophile?
Because all I see is sex for a few more months and then it all goes sour and you never want to see each other again.
Is it really worth it to you for you to break up a family so that you can get your booty call? How mant hearts have to be broken before people can see what they're doing wrong?
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A
female
reader, Mugzie69 +, writes (19 July 2009):
 I suppose you could consider giving him another child...but are you sure that this is the life you want?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): I feel so sorry for his wife. Imagine that was you. Please tell her oneday so she can drop his useless ass!!!! You need to grow up and understand you are involved in breaking up a family!!!!!
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (19 July 2009):
 Did you write this question too?
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/he-says-im-hotter-than-his-wife-and.html
If not, you should read those answers.
Have you asked him to leave his wife? My guess is that you have and he's given you a load of excuses. My advice to you is be prepared to be heartbroken, and make sure you see your doctor to be checked for STIs. Guys like this generally have a lot of sex partners.
Take care.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): why is everyone blaming the guy, she is the one who continues to maintain the affair and wants to break up his family. Come on everyone why treat her like the innocent victim for heavens sake, he is not the only slut.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2009): Okay I don't think it's very fair how these other responders are attacking you. You are young. You may have feelings for this guy and it may appear that he's being good to you. But he's not being good to you. You do not exist in his world. He's probably never even told anyone about you. Is that what you want a relationship to be?... you not existing? You do not deserve this. Unfortunately these other responders are right, you need to get out of this. Do it before you really get hurt.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2009): Wow are you serious about this, are you that blind to not see that he is not leaving his wife and is just using you. If he wanted to be with you for the rest of his life he would have divorced his wife. Grow up and do yourself a favor move on and find some around your age.
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A
female
reader, bobbles32  +, writes (18 July 2009):
 I don't understand why the hell someone would ever think something like this? Clearly he's using you (this is a little perverse, no?) He's more than old enough to be your dad. He's settled down and has his wife and kids and he's scum, because he's cheating on his wife with you, a little girl. Trust me, when you're older you're not going to want to be with him. He's going to be old and feeble and retired by the time you get a stable career and plan to do things with your life.
If he wants to be with you exclusively he will end things with his wife himself. Clearly he's not into that idea. So just leave him and try to get over the fact that you were used.
Players and guys who want a peice will tell you that you're their princess and that you're beautiful and everything else!
Open your eyes and see this for what it really is.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2009): No no no, do NOT try to split them up. I'm sorry to say but the most likely case is that he is using you for sex. Has he told you he loves you? That he'll leave her for you? If so, chances are he's lying. If he did, he would at least respect you and not sleep with you.
What I think you should do, is stop having sex with him, and tell him you can't be with someone who is married and is using you. Because that is what he is doing. Let his wife find out for himself what a lying cheater he is.
If you do decide to go the other, and try to split them up, then it won't be pretty, and he'll probably go begging back to his wife. Hypethetically, if he did leave them, You'll become his girlfriend and then after a while he'll realise what he lost, or look else where. What would you feel then? I can gaurantee you won't feel good.
It will be hard but you need to stop this, move on, and find someone who isn't taken.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2009): miss do you see hes not leaving his wife? why should he hes got the good life getting away from his wife and having sex the come home to his wife and screw her. hes not leaving her.
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A
female
reader, sahara05 +, writes (18 July 2009):
wise up before it is too late. this guy is never ever going to leave his wife for you
you and his wife and children will get hurt if this ever gets out and his wife and children do not deserve that as they have not done anything wrong
get out when you can
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2009): are you for real????? this guy is obviously having his cake and eating it. What on earth have you got to offer other then sex in the back of his car?? His wife must take care of the house, clean his clothes, cook his dinner, care for his kids, share his bad, and can talk to him as an adult.This sleaze bag is using you. He will never leave his wife for you. He is using you only you are too you and blind to realise you are nothing to him. Do yourself a favour and leave him before you get hurt badly.Also remember his wife and children have done nothing to deserve this, the sleaze bag probably lets her think married life is great and believes he loves her.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2009): Are you kidding girl? You'll never be anything other than his young bit on the side, his escape from reality, and when the shit hits the fan you'll be the one that gets sprayed with it.
Wise up before it's too late.
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