A
female
age
36-40,
*ula
writes:How do I act around a crush, given that I choose "accidently on purpose" to be where he works and stand the possibilty of being served by him. I don't live in that town, but I used to go there often...I really want to see if he'll chat me up again as he did last time I was there. That was two months ago and just last week, I met a friend there and as we were leaving he came to his shift and flashed a smile and asked how I was. I will be leaving before August, not many encounters left, but I feel I ought to give it a chance since there's potential. Last time, we chatted for about half an hour before my friend and I had to leave. We got acquainted and he asked me more personal questions that he asked my friend and kept eye contact ... How do I help give him a sign without degrading myself or being too obvious?!
View related questions:
crush, workplace Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Dodds  +, writes (6 June 2014):
 Hey you're a lady it's ok to be afraid and wait for him to take the lead, if you wanna use your friend as a go between, please do and see what happens but it would have been so much better if you said something as you could tell from his response if he is at all interested.
But try not to get swept away in emotions if anything positive, by way of his response comes your way, just go with the vibe but guard your health and heart cautiously enough. Good luck!!
A
female
reader, Tula +, writes (4 June 2014):
Tula is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI went on my own this time, he was up to his ears at work and he tried to make me wait longer that my request required but then again not a word more not a word less exchanged. I looked busy with my business and left politely after some good 40 minutes, nada. Nothing exchanged, a friend we have in common said he's the shy type in passing conversation. Shall I ask her to help me or do you think he's really not interested and that he was merely polite the first time? Trouble is, a few weeks back, I passed at his workplace and he flashed me a smile and I smile back briefly and continued the conversation I was having with this very friend I mentioned (the one that knows him and even has him on her FB page). I really fancy him and wish something to spark a real encounter, but clueless on gathering my courage and not losing my nerves. I'm such a coward especially if he doesn't take the lead, I read it as a sign that he is really NOT INTO me!! thanks for any tips 3
...............................
A
female
reader, tibob  +, writes (31 May 2014):
 I agree with tisha. Why do you think you will degrade yourself by asking hhim out? Take your chance. Don't let your fear of rejection make you miss an opportunity. If you don't want to be obvious, you can ask him to go to watch a movie or hang around somewhere.
...............................
A
female
reader, Tula +, writes (31 May 2014):
Tula is verified as being by the original poster of the question3 Thank You Tisha-1 & Dodds 3
Life's short indeed, we must go for it!!
peace out X
...............................
A
male
reader, Dodds +, writes (31 May 2014):
Just ask him out!! My current girlfriend did and it was similar to your situation as she comes to my work place to do her business. We are very happy and am glad she had the good sense to ask me out because my work schedule is a real hindrance but we try. Don't hesitate, you have nothing to lose and besides, you never know ??
...............................
A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (31 May 2014):
 "So when are you going to ask me out?" would be an American approach.
"I do enjoy our talks when we are able to meet up, please do call me if you'd like to talk more." and hand him your card with your number.
"I've always been interested in that cuisine you mentioned and if there's a restaurant nearby maybe you could teach me more about the dishes. I'm free this afternoon if you are available."
"Talking about all these things with you has been so refreshing and enjoyable. I do hope we'll have the chance to do it again soon." Significant pause with eye contact. "I'll just leave you my card with my phone number on it so you have it."
"So are you just going to chat me up or are you going to actually ask me out?"
Life is short. You're a little under halfway through it. What's holding you back? Go ask the man out. That's not degrading. That's asking for what you want and there's nothing degrading about letting a man know you'd like to get to know him better.
...............................
|
