A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok my boyfriend wonts anal sex and we tried but it hurt real bad. what can i do to make it feel better. we tried changing position but was the same.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009): Be very careful, remember your butt isnt really made for that. As a girl porn star once said "i have a vagina and a mouth you know, so whats the point"
Doctors I talk to always advise against it as you can do quite a bit of damage.
If you want to though then get him to sit behind you and tell him to keep still. Move yourself onto him, this will alow you to get used to it and it wont hurt so much.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2009): Wow, some less than steller advice. First, I'm assuming that he wants to have anal sex with you, and that penitration was painful. It's vital that you learn to relax your sphincter muscles (there are two) so taht you can accept something going in rather than out. use of a good lubrication is vital, KY at a minimum, avoid anything with numbing agents in them, as you can cause injury to yourself.Start by you working a finger inside yourself while your in a warm bath. Get nice and clean and slowly probe. Learn to relax the outter sphincter. Once you can have one finger (make sure you both trim your nails, or use a rubber glove to protect against scrapes from your nails) put a second finger in there and relax. Once your relaxed, start moving your hand and get used to the motion. You may need to press out (like your taking a poo) to allow your fingers to get past the second sphincter.FYI: In all the years I've had anal sex with women there's never been a poo issue, and we've never used an enema... if you do, use is several hours before you try anal, as you rectum will need to replinish the mucus that's naturally there (it's not much, but it's something), and if you try anal right after an enema I've read that you can get cramps, and/or have a bit of water expelled when he pulls out.Once you've trained your body to relax, and are ready to try a penis, have him get you off with at lease one really good orgasm, lie on your stomach, make sure he's hard as iron, and have him lube up you rectum and his penis. He then needs to postion the head of his cock right on your asshole and when you're ready very slowly begin applying pressure.At this point YOU need to be 100% in control. if you say STOP, need needs to freeze, if you say pull out, he needs to slowly and carefully withdraw. Explain to him that if he does this right, you can do this often, but if he blows it, the backdoor will be locked forever... no forceful pounding (until you say OK).Once he's in past the first sphincter, your likely going to need to relax and do some deep breathing, when your ready tell him, and he can continue to press, once he's past the second sphincter, you need to continue breathing, relaxing and then ready tell him to start pumping you.If he's aligned correctly, he should be hitting your g-spot through the thin wall of skin seperating your ass from your pussy. This should generate some earth shaking orgasms, hopefully you'll have one and enjoy the act.With alittle preparation and practice (it may take a week or two) you should be able to be having successfuly anal sex. For folks who don't like it, please do NOT do it... but if you enjoy it, do it caefully. A condom is a must if your not fluid bonded (in a committed exclusive relationship) and will help make his cock smoother.In teh past I've found practicing with dildos and butt plugs to be counter productive, and they were too rigid and uncomprotable. My GF can't stand a dildo in her ass, but at the right time LOVES my cock there...
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (26 October 2009):
 That's enough to make any guy run from the idea. lol At the time, if you thought it was that gross, you wouldn't have tried. I know, I'd never attempt anal with a girl who's totally against the idea of it. If you do try at some point, remember that preparation is the key to any sexual change. You need to enjoy just as much as it's important for him to.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell no i dont real wont to but he is curious about it i think its gross and i cant never go to the bathroom right after that. but maybe one day if i feel like trying i will try lube and 4 play. i dont see that ever happing. i told him this morning i would let him if he let me put my large curling iron in his.
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A
female
reader, Ravenxx91  +, writes (25 October 2009):
 Uhm. Well If its ALSO your choice to WANT to do it (dont do it just because your boyfriend wants it. If thats why your doing it, it will be alot harder for you to do)
Ok so if you are willing there are two good ways to do it, it sounds silly.
To be simple, kneel over as if doing doggy style (prefbly on a bed, your knees will hurt eventually else) heres the bit that sounds silly.
When bent over go back as if sitting on your knees then basically put your head down low on your arms or a pillow, keep your arms near your head sorta thing. And bottom in the air to put it nicely. It sounds sick for what were talking about but (might have seen it on tv) the way a baby sleeps sometimes? sleeping on their front, bum in the hair, arms crossed with their head leaning on it.
It will make it more comfortable for you, because *ahem* to put it nicely once again... because your knees are bent and your bum is back (to being above your feet) it...opens you up a bit.
On top of this try foreplay and lube...alot if needed
Make sure you take your time as well and your boyfriend needs to know to take his time.
Good luck x If you need any moer help or advice, mail me x
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): Give it up. It's unnatural and if it hurts, it is because it's meant to. RCN has got half the story right: "...your body will react to something going in as being foreign, so it's natural you'll tense up and attempt to prevent it." If your guy can't content himself with your vagina, tell him to go fuck a hole in a brick wall. He might just then understand the pain your going through in your misguided attenpt to please the selfish bastard.
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (25 October 2009):
Using lube or attempting dry? If dry, try lube. Also, that area needs 4 play too. Can't just expect it to be ready and willing. And entry be done slow. It's going to hurt at first, cause your body will react to something going in as being foreign, so it's natural you'll tense up and attempt to prevent it. It'll get better once you learn to relax your muscles too. This will take time, which part of that is overcoming the fear of trying something different. One his end, the biggest part to follow is having patience. Being horny and just wanting to get right to it is not going to work.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (25 October 2009):
The only thing I can suggest is lubrication.
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