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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: hi guys,im 22 years old and have been with my boyfriend for 9 months. its going very well, and we have had sex. but now my boyfriend really wants me to start giving him blowjobs and swallowing his sperm. i have only give a few blowjobs. i've been told that im not great at them and i have a really bad gagging reflex so i hate giving them (also, when you think of what the penis does, i dont really want that in my mouth). i am willing to give him a blowjob but i need some tips. how can i fight my gagging reflex and improve giving them. as for swallowing sperm. its something that i would usually say no to. but i am intrigued by it. ive had come on my face once or twice and i like the texture. but what does it taste like. is any body willing to tell me. thank you
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male
reader, DoberDark  +, writes (9 July 2012):
Hello anonymous,Here are a few tips for the "swallowing" part of your question. These have all been tried and tested and helpful for me. Let me know if any of these help you.1- Keep a glass of water or juice (even champagne works and trust me that one is FUUUNNN :D) close by for during and quickly after the BJ.2- I've had an ex that liked chewing a small piece of green pepper right after swallowing. She said it cut the taste of semen and got rid of the texture afterwards.3- Keep a popsicle or Mr. Freeze close by for during and quickly after the BJ. You can play with the hot and cold feelings to turn your man on and change the flavor in your mouth ;).4- Flavoured lubricants intended for oral sex. You can go to any sex shop and pick the flavour you like. Be careful though, too sweet and you'll get sick of it. As for mint, peppermint, etc.... Make sure your boyfriend isn't allergic or the BJ will be nice but after he'll think he is on fire!! :P
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2011): Thanks for referencing my link 'dirtball'...
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/oral-sex-can-be-a-sharing-experience-.html
I think the 'sharing' attitude helps to make making the oral sex experience wonderful and affirming.
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2011): The answers here have been great! I'm middle aged and just became intimate with a great man also in early 50's... we got into oral sex early on and I had to adjust a bit of my thinking about swallowing etc. I'd done it a few times in my younger years but a bit nervous, but figured if it were in the back of my mouth it would be less of an issue and it is. Re. the taste, well as I've written else where it is the 'taste of sex' and earthy. A bad diet can make the taste more strong.
You seem to be ok with semen outside from what you describe so him coming in your mouth should be less of an issue once you get into it. I'm less inclined to want to see sperm or handle it outside of my mouth or vagina. Swallowing is great with less mess, and no visuals which I am not interested in or intrigued by. Everyone's different. My man seems to like that I do it and the taste is minimal as I take him deep when he comes.
Gagging can be a problem especially for the larger penis. I think if you can apply a few deep sucks many men are happy, just put alot of attention to sucking, licking and really loving his penis. Sucks along the shaft at the side, licks and kisses are all good and let him know how much you love his stuff goes along way when you cannot take it all due to gag reflex. Relaxing into the experience help too.
Many men respond more to the head being stimulated, ask and watch his reactions. I love when a man cherishes my oral attention to him. That he can get aggressive but not forcing me in anyway.
I think oral sex given with enthusiasm and desire is the biggest mental and physical turn on. Sometimes even if I am not in the mood fully to give my man head, knowing how much pleasure it gives him is exciting and affirming that we share such an intimate time. And when he gives me oral I am affirmed that he wants to please me as well.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionchigirl, much love. tbh, i found your first answer a little hot. it made me eager to try it, lol.
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (2 May 2011):
 And there another woman goes proud and confident in her blowjob skills. Good job!
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni did it and he loved it!! i just sucked and moved my lips over his head, using my tongue too. i worked his shaft with my hand and i even sucked his testes. i dint gag, just stuck to my limits.
as for the sperm, i let him come on my hands and i had a little try and... i love it. i drank all of it. little slut lol.
thank you so much for your help.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2011): There is a lot to be said in praise of antiseptic throat lozenges; numbs the 'gag reflex'.
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female
reader, Rose22  +, writes (27 April 2011):
 hey i would say i had this problem but i still have this problem. this trick is i think practise because even though i sometimes gag it get less and lass the more you do it. just make sure your bf doesnt try to push your head down onto him as this will make it too deep and will promt you to gag.
as for the taste..in my opinion just the taste can make you gag sometimes...depending on what the boy has eaten.
it tastes like salt, and chlorine if you can kind of imagin the bitter taste that has. boys like it when you swallow but you dont have to. just tell him to take it slowly and ease into it.
good luck!
redrose
xx
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (26 April 2011):
 If he's a "good guy" he'll understand that a good old fashioned hand job beats a BJ any day of the week. Try that instead. You will both be happier.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (26 April 2011):
 can't help with the gag reflex...
but if you use your hands at the base to come up and meet your mouth then he will feel more "enclosed" and that might help...
as for sperm/semen... most of the time it tastes nasty which is why getting most of the penis in your mouth is a good thing because when he cums it's already past your tongue and you can't taste it. and you barely notice it.
BUT have him drink lots of pineapple juice and eat lots of fruits... it will help a bit with the taste
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female
reader, chigirl +, writes (26 April 2011):
Sperm doesn't taste good. Some women enjoy it, but it is a very bitter taste. Bitter and sour. If he drinks lots of water and eats vegetables, lays off coffee, it might taste better.
For me, I only swallow the sperm if I feel like giving my guy a special treat, as I don't like the taste at all. Usually I will just go to the bathroom and spit it out, or have some toilet paper nearby and spit it out in that... or most commonly just use my hands on the last part so he doesn't come in my mouth.
If you do intend to swallow I recommend keeping something by the bedside to wash your mouth with immediately afterwards. Such as a mint, or a cup of tea, or something else you enjoy drinking that you can take a few sips of just to wash the taste away real quick. I found that a cup of tea works great, even if it is cold by the time you finish him off. Water is better than nothing, but not quite as effective.-
As for your gagging, don't deep throat. Just take him in your mouth as deep as YOU feel is ok. Sex isn't about one partner suffering through an act to please the other. Make it enjoyable for you as well. Personally I don't find the actual blowjob, or technique, particularly enjoyable. It can be ok, but it's not something that in itself is a turn on. However, there are so many other things about a blowjob that make me love them. Knowing you have absolute control over your mans pleasure is intriguing, knowing you can intensify his pleasure, or tease him, make him moan and clench his fists, or make him anticipate your next move. The sounds a man makes when you pleasure him are a turn on. And then the penis itself, it is beautiful. When he gets close you can feel it throbbing, you use your hands to feel the girth, things you usually don't feel so well through intercourse. You get to have a close look at it, learn his weak spots, and make it yours.
Use your hands while giving a blowjob. I take small breaks to not get tired in my mouth, and use my hands instead. Or if I want him to last longer I can use my hands instead of my tongue for a little, as your tongue on his penis head is very sensitive and can make him come fast.
Remember that as well, it is the head of the penis that is most sensitive. To avoid gagging, dont take him deep in your mouth, but focus on the head. Roll your tongue around it, and up and down the shaft. Use your hands at the same time to grab around his shaft, or to caress his testicles. Be careful with the testicles, they don't need more than a gentle stroke. The area between the testicles and the anus is also sensitive, you can lick it, touch it, you can also lick the testicles for variation. Licking works wonders on his penis as well, it's not all about taking him into your mouth!
I spend most of my time when giving a blowjob on liking and stroking him with my hands. Then to finish him off, taking him into my mouth and press my lips together around him. No need to go deep down (even though taking him in deep is nice for variation, if you don't get a gagging reflex). I press my lips down a little below the head of the penis, so that my lips rub against the "rim" of the head. Then I use my hands to grab around the base, and pump it fast. That works wonders.
Tell your man to keep his hands to himself though. Some men who don't know better like to touch your head, try to move you, or touch you while you're at it. Don't let him. Take control and tell him to not touch you, he's not allowed to move either, he's just supposed to stay still and take it.
Good luck ;)
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2011): can't help u wid d gagging reflex but ya as far d taste of sperm is concerned its warm n salty..n harmless to swallow. U dont hav to b so much afraid of it. Gud luck for d next blowjob.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2011): First off...who tells a woman they dont give good blowjobs? thats just cruel. There are good ones and better ones, but none are really bad. Second, maybe find out a combination of hand and mouth movements that get him off so you dont have to put so much in your mouth that you gag. I personally get off from stimulation on my shaft more than my head, and not all women can get their lips to the lower part of my shaft, so hands are usually necessary to give me the right stimulation. As for the perception thing...well, you might have to get past that. Guys lick women where they pee, bleed and have all sorts of other fluids, so IMO, teh penis is relatively "clean" in comparison.As for taste, well, I have had the unusual opportunity to taste a small bit once, and it tasted pretty much like snot...sorry to be crude, but it does. maybe a bit thicker and with a metallic or sour tinge. Every woman's taste differs tho. Some told me I taste wonderful, others dont like my taste, some swore a diet of citrusy fruit and meats made it sweeter and buttery.
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male
reader, dirtball +, writes (26 April 2011):
 I really like this recent article: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/oral-sex-can-be-a-sharing-experience-.html
It may help with the swallowing thing.
As for the gag reflex, there are different sprays that can help with it until you adjust, but really it just takes practice. Don't push yourself too hard, but don't be afraid of a little gagging either. Lots of guys find it a turn on.
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female
reader, Daphne...x  +, writes (26 April 2011):
Hii :)
I'm the same, I have a bad gag reflex, but I just take my mind off it and i've learned to enjoy pleasuring him and get on with it. As for the taste of sperm, well.....if you like salt then you'll have no problem haha x
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