A
female
age
30-35,
*quares
writes:It seems like my boyfriend of three years just doesn't care when things are planned out. He and I are planning to take a romantic weekend trip to a nearby city. Today he went to the dentist to make an appointment to have his wisdom teeth taken out. The day is set: wednesday. Two days before we leave. I was angry and hurt when I found out. He'll be in pain and unable to eat in any of the fantastic restaurants, or kiss me, and how will we make love when his head is throbbing? He'll likely want to do nothing but sleep (he's an awful patient) and complain. He assures me that he'll be in perfect health, but I think his operation will ruin the trip. We fought for an hour about it, and I ended up feeling like I'd kicked a wounded puppy. Am I being unflexible and overreacting, or is my irate response justified? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2009): Well there might be deeper issues existing. Have you told him what you think would happen with him? As you can see most people here say that wisdom teeth will indeed cause a lot of pain. Heck I think you should go behind his back and reschedule the thing. What he doesn't know wont hurt him. Have the dentist call him and tell him that he rescheduled coz he will be busier that day than usual.
A
female
reader, squares +, writes (21 July 2009):
squares is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for your responses. Just a quick clarification: This is not an urgent appointment. This trip has been planned for weeks and he was well aware of the dates. Of course if it was important his health would come first. It seems to be more that doing it at a later date is inconvenient for him. I don't know... it's always like this it seems.
...............................
A
female
reader, kellyxxx  +, writes (21 July 2009):
 This is totally irrational, his dental hygiene has to come first before a romantic weekend! You could even be his nurse! X
...............................
A
female
reader, jaime90  +, writes (21 July 2009):
 i would feel annoyed and hurt too. Although, depending on the circumstances. How long have you been planning this trip? was he well aware of the dates? is it urgent he gets his wisdom teeth out? maybe there was only one appointment left and this will be his only chance. His parents might have been on his back about getting them out. Its not wrong for you to feel hurt, but you have to take all this into consideration. and if there was another appointment available and it wasnt urgent that he get the teeth out then maybe you could have a chat to him and tell him you feel unimportant when he disregards your plans, but dont be mean about it.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2009): Well hmm, can't he just reschedule it? He may or may not be in pain but I think with those kind of odds, it would be better to just reschedule the dentist. You should ask him why does he want to risk the trip.
It makes me wonder why didn't he is so insistent to the point you both have to argue about it. It could be me just over thinking that maybe he doesn't wanna spend the weekend with you...but I can't rly say that at this point. Just have him reschedule it after the trip.
...............................
A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries +, writes (21 July 2009):
 not at all i mean you guys planned a trip! and he'll be in AWEFULL pain! he says he won't be he will!
wisdom teeth are a KILLER for pain.
he should of either organized this BEFORE the trip or waited until after i mean surely he can wait until after....?
it's not THAT important right?
ask him to change the appointment until you get back from holidays surely he can wait a couple extra days to have them out.
hope this helps :)
x ilovebowsandcherries x
...............................
A
female
reader, flicka23  +, writes (21 July 2009):
 If your he suffers from his wisdom teeth, then I think that health comes before sex and holidays. You can still arrange other romantic weekend. I too I would have been upset like you but I would try to reason myself that the health of the one I love is precious and I cannot make any compromise when it comes to his health.
...............................
A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20  +, writes (21 July 2009):
 I think he cares when things are planned out, but he likes making his own decisions. He has a right to plan things when he wants to plan them, but his choice of the day to do it does make me wonder as well. Why would he deliberately schedule that day so close to when you would be leaving?
...............................
|
