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*ninha
writes: Dear Cupid, a few months ago I met this guy who truly loves me, and the problem is he was once married and has a child. When I met him he was separated from his wife and child, so I went out with him with no problem. Now she is back, I don't know what to do. Please help. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2005): Don't go out with him if he is not sure where your relationship is going.
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reader, kt  +, writes (7 June 2005):
 Stick by him. The last relationship he had with his wife has obviously failed, otherwise they would still be together. If she ever says or does anything don't be scared off; that is what she wants. If you love him and he loves you, you can get though this. Don't drag him away from his child though and don't force him to do anything he doesn't want to do, otherwise the relationship between you two could fade or be led into arguements. Make sure he knows your thoughts and feelings about this otherwise you will end up being really unhappy.good luck!
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reader, NG +, writes (7 June 2005):
Well, I would like to help you, but you didn't give enough information about your situation. You didn't say how long you've been going out or in what way his wife is back. Is she back with him...or she's just back in the picture?? Are they living together?Anyway, although I haven't got enough information to judge, I would advise you to be aware that she is his wife and they have a child together.....Imagine you are in her shoes.....I guess you'd like your child to have his/her father back!Do not be the one to keep him away from the child...it will hurt both of you in the future. However, try to find out the relationship between him and the wife....and discuss with him!Good Luck!
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female
reader, Wendyg +, writes (7 June 2005):
 First off, you don't mention if he has any intentions of seeing her again. He may well need to have contact with her for the sake of the child, but that may be all. They obviously seperated for a reason, and he is now with you. Unless he has already gone back to her, unless you tell him your fears, then you are not going to be helping yourself by sitting in silence. As I say I'm not sure if he has already seen her again ? If he has, it could just be because of the child ? If he hasn't met up with her, what suggests to you that he will ? It could be that you are worrying about nothing, just because she is back doesn't been that they will get back together. You say he truly loves you, maybe he's happy being with you and it's you that has these fears. I think you need to ask him where you stand and what future he can see for the two of you. If he says that he wants to try with the wife again, then you may have to walk away and find someone new. But nothing suggests her thats the case, for all you know he may want to be with you, and the ex coming back as filled him with just as much dread. explain your concerns to him, let him know that you are there for him and hopefully you will find that you are just worrying over nothing.Take carex x
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reader, psychic1 +, writes (7 June 2005):
What do you mean she is back? How long was she really gone? Is she living with him again or trying to get him back? You say he really loves you, well this is the test that will let you know for sure. Marriage & children are a huge commitment & he will need time & space to sort out what he is going to do. Be strong & believe in yourself. He can only be yours if he was truly free to begin with. Was he? That he will have to find out for himself. Set a time limit that you are comfortable with, say a week or a month. If he hasn't made up his mind by then, let him go & move on to someone who truly deserves your love. All the best.
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