A
female
age
26-29,
*ngurl
writes:I'm a 17 year old girl, when I was 16 I met this guy. He was 19. I met him on a social networking site called "tagged" we talked for a bit and really got to know each other, he use to live in the town that I lived in and I use to live in the town that he lives in. Anyway, the distance was only about 2 hours away. We dated but he didn't wanna tell anyone because he said people would judge because of my age... There was only a 3 year difference... But we dated (still hadn't met) I had set a date where I would move in with my dad (he lived in the town he that the guy from tagged lives) I left for one week and he had slept with another girl.. I found out from one of my friends that was friends with the girl that he had slept with... We knew each other. It was that big of a deal since me and the guy hadn't met.. but he continued to tell me that he loved me and wanted to meet me but he was dating that girl.. one day i went to the town that he lives in and stayed at a friends house, we met up with him and i ended up sleeping with him and dating him again.. we only dated for about 2 weeks this time.. when we broke up i was devastated.. i loved him. but as the year carried on he dated lots of others girls, but between break ups he would say that he still cares about me and wants to sleep with me... well 1 month ago him and i slept together for the first time in a year... he seemed like he really care about me when we had sex and i spent the night.. he is now 20. after i left his house he barely talked to me.. he told me he was started dating someone else again... they broke up and then he said he wanted to sleep with me again... i wanted to... but i didn't because before i knew he's dating another girl.. i don't know what to do, im honestly so heartbroken because i love him and i don't even know why. please help... what do i do..
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female
reader, Kngurl +, writes (19 January 2014):
Kngurl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you so much everyone! :) i've cut all contact with him and i'm now in a happy functional relationship! :)
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (6 October 2013):
 Honey, there's people who say they love you and there's people who say they can sell you the Brooklin Bridge for 50 bucks. It's not saying a thing which makes it true, it's actually backing up their claim with deeds.
I don't mean to suggest you live your life under a cloud of paranoiia, - just to open your eyes and use that God given brain you've got.
If he is always dating other girls , does he care about you ? Does he love you ? No- if he did , he would be dating you.
He just says these things because they get him what he wants. If he'd tell you " Look, I could not care less about you,I just want to get laid " - probably, although infatuated, you would not cooperate.
If it's feelings that you want, you will not get them from this guy, so there's no point in keeping allowing him to use you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 October 2013): How gullible and dumb can a person be? He's clearly playing with you. YOU seem to know that, but won't leave him. Fact of the matter is HE DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU. I don't know why he's playing with you this way, but clearly he is enjoying the best of both worlds. And if you think you NEED him in your life and that you can't live without him, it's just a mental block. Cause you really can. Dump him... Forget about him... Move on. You're only 17, and you wanna have these shit "relationship" issues. Take our advice.
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A
female
reader, Dionee'  +, writes (6 October 2013):
 He is plain down using you. He isn't even trying to hide it because he knows he doesn't have to hide it as you'll end up in his bed again eventually. He knows that you're gullible, naive and emotionally attached so he'll get what he wants. You're his booty-call. He tells you sweet nothings just to get you into bed and you allow that to happen. You don't love this guy and he sure as hell doesn't love you so just move on. He's a jackass and a waste of time. I suggest you leave this guy alone and next time don't be so quick to let a guy in your pants.Everything that happened is what you allowed to happen so start sticking up for yourself and say NO to his advances. Don't give in or you will find yourself back here asking another question in relation to this guy. STAY AWAY FROM HIM for your own good.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (6 October 2013):
 He is using you. He SAYS he loves you, but he doesn't. He just LOVE to get laid, and YOU are conveniently giving it up when he asks.
STOP talking to him. Cut the contact 100%.
Find a guy who wants you for you, not for the sex they he "might" get.
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A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (6 October 2013):
Hi there. It is very easy to fall in love with someone, once you have slept with them.
And each time after that you sleep with them, a girl's feelings will develop for them even more.
I think you may be "in love" with him, but are mistaking it for loving him.
He seems to keep on dating and sleeping with all different girls in between seeing or talking to you.
And he brags about it to you.
If he really cared about you as much as you seem to care about him, he wouldn't be talking about other girls when he is chatting online with you.
He would keep it secret.
It does seem that he is only interested in the physical side of things, and unfortunately the distance between you plays a part in that.
He can't see you, because of the 2 hours or so distance between you, and so it isn't easy to just drive to see each other.
It would need planning.
And it also seems, that if and when you DO see each other, it is only for sex and a bit of a chat, and that's about all.
He doesn't spend money on you - from what you say here - it is just a hook up, and then you go your separate ways.
It sounds a bit like Friends With Benefits, to me.
And the website "Tagged", sounds like it might just be a chatsite for people who just want sex with someone on a casual basis, but without any real commitment.
It doesn't sound like it is a website for finding your life partner, and lifelong happiness with someone special.
You probably need to find someone who is worthy of your love, because he doesn't seem to fit into that category.
He hasn't done one single thing to make you feel special.
And it certainly doesn't seem like he is going to stop sleeping around, just for you.
Because, he talks to you and you may or may not meet up, and then in your absence he is sleeping with and dating all other different girls.
He isn't showing any sign of wanting to commit only to you, is he?
He just occasionally says to you, that he wants to sleep with you again.
He isn't declaring his undying love for you, is he?
He isn't saying that he misses you, and would love to see you, is he?
His heart just isn't in it.
If you classify what you had together as being boyfriend and girlfriend, well then what about all the other girls he is probably saying this to?
He is cheating on you with them.
And each of them may be thinking it is just him and them, but that isn't true.
His life seems to be made up of sleeping with this girl and that girl, and without any real need for him to be serious about any of them.
At the moment, he just wants the sex.
And he doesn't seem to want anything more than that - with anyone.
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (6 October 2013):
 I'm sorry, but he's using you for sex. Pure and simple. He shows no signs of caring about you as a person. He tells you he "loves" you so that you'll keep putting out for him.
Lift your head high, stiffen your backbone and tell yourself you're worth more than the likes of HIM - because you ARE.
Give him the boot and don't look back!
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A
male
reader, Cerees +, writes (6 October 2013):
 Sounds like he just wants to use you for sex. I could be wrong, but from the information you provided it sounds like he is using you. I would say the wisest choice would be to make a clean break from him, otherwise this could go on for quite some time and you will get hurt again and again.
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