A
female
age
41-50,
*ekoalanie
writes:my boyfriend txt me and letting me know that part of him wants to be with me, and part of him feels like he needs to give his daughter's mom a chance together, and yet his saying he just letting me know and he doesnt know what his going to do yet help Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2010): Thanks everyone for replying my ?, I'm comfused also if i want to let him go or wait for him to make a decision, we haven't talk yet or seen each other for a week but his been txting me asking how im doing babe he miss me and sooon. I guessim stupid coz untill now im still talkin to him. help
A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (3 November 2010):
 I think he needs to understand that the relationship with his daughters mother ended for a simple reason ... It didn't work out. However If he goes back the same thing is bound to happen again if you weren't involved in the original breakup.
But if he originally left her for you then it will pick right back up from where it left off.
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A
female
reader, kekoalanie +, writes (3 November 2010):
kekoalanie is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI want him and be with him , but his not sure what he wants. so i can be a nice one and let him go so he and his baby mom can be together and he can give his daughter a chance to have a dad and mom together.
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj +, writes (3 November 2010):
 Give the guy a break- at least he's was honest and let her know what he's actually feeling...
He could easily have just left out of the blue, could have come home with the house emptied and him living with his ex with no warning so don't make him seem like a monster... sheesh
However- having said that, at least now you have a bit of time to assess what you're going to do. Are you going to try to win him over? Are you going to try to distance yourself from him? Plan to have a big talk with him to get to the bottom of this? He's clearly conflicted- while the kid is a big factor, he wouldn't get back with her if he wasn't still somewhat attracted to her and could imagine being with her still.
I do think that you should distance yourself a bit. Perhaps tell him something like- "I know you're conflicted so I'm going to give you plenty of space and you can clear your head and figure out what you want".
If you are really dead set on keeping him then you could also say something like: "if you do decide that you want me and provided I still want you- then I want assurance that you aren't going to "get confused" again"
But yeh, don't hang around waiting for this guy for long- if at all. You do deserve to be a guys #1 priority.
More info would be great though- not much to work with here... you don't actually say what YOU want...
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (3 November 2010):
 There is no time like the present...why don't you text him and tell him it's over, show him the same level of curtesy that he showed you.
Your right to want it all!, to be with someone who you can give your whole heart to and for them to reciprocate. Don't be sad, when you do find the right guy you will look back at this and wonder what all the fuss was about.
Good luck darling!! and chin up!! xxx
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A
female
reader, kekoalanie +, writes (3 November 2010):
kekoalanie is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys that really help me to make a decision!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2010): Thanks! When is the best time to tell him is over. I really like and love this guy but ur right i dnt want half of his life nor his heart. I want it all.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (3 November 2010):
OK then get a hacksaw and chop off the part that wants to be with you!!!...just kidding...that wouldn't work.
The guy is confused, and when a man is confused, he is better left to his own devices. Unless you can stand to share him with someone else, you probably need to distance yourself from him for a while. There is the potential to get hurt, so it's always easier if you make a decision and stick with it. He may come back to you or he may play games between the two of you.
You need to really think about what you want and how it's going to work for you. Bear in mind that he because he has a child with the other woman that he is always going to have some kind of contact with her and that's a difficult thing to get cosy with.
Think!, is this is really working out for you?
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (3 November 2010):
 Let him go. It sounds to me as if he is diplomatically preparing to you the fact that he is going to actually give another chance to his ex. But even if he were genuinely confused and uncertain right now- well, can you settle for half a man ? Half of his heart, half of his thoughts, half of his desire ?
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