A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I lost my virginity to this guy a few months ago. Since then we talk. I want a relationship but he doesn't. He says he likes me, but it would be hard to be in a relationship because he doesn't have a cell phone and it wouldn't be fair to me because it would be hard to stay in contact. He says when school is over (in June) he will probably be ready to have a real relationship (he didn't specifically say with me) and told me I could wait if I wanted to.I don't want to get hurt, but at the same time I want to be as close to him as I can get. Should I just completely stay away from him - I don't want to. Or should I invite him over and spend time with him and not give up on the relationship idea?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2008): I wrote letters to my boyfriend, and he wrote back long before we were even together. Seriously there are about ten billion ways to stay in contact with a person without a phone (im, email, web cams, actually travelling to see the person..i dont know if youre talking about a long distance thing or not) This guy just sounds like hes making a really lame excuse. Seriously, even if you want to stay in touch with him, he doesnt sound like a nice guy at all, not someone youd want to wait till summer for, just to be let down, you deserve someone better than that, who, as the last person said, will make time for you.
A
female
reader, xxbaybeegal  +, writes (12 January 2008):
 can't you see it, he doesnt want you. what kind of guy would say "can you wait until schools over". well i mean if you can wait for another 5 months or so go ahead but you know, he's taken you virginity and that's what he probably wanted. if he doesn't have a cell phone, there are other ways of communication eg. computer or internet cafe, letter, a pay phone for heaven sake. i dont see any reason for you to waste 5 months waiting for him then seeing him with some other girl from his school
if your waiting to heart-broken by this guy but if you want to find someone that doesnt give stupind excuses then leave him
the best of luck xxbaybeegal
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A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (12 January 2008):
Im sorry to say this but it sounds like hes making up an excuse to cover up the real reason why he doesnt want to be in a relationship. Its nothing personal towards you, I think he just wants to have casual sex with girls.
He knew before he slept with you that he didnt have a phone, so he would of known back then that a relationship would not of worked. But he didnt tell you this did he? Why? Because he knew that if he did, you probably wouldnt sleep with him. So now, after he has gotten what he wanted, he giving you an excuse.
However, him saying that he might be ready for a relationship in june does make it all a bit more confusing. Perhaps he is trying to make his lie about the phone seem less suspicious.
I think you should move on from him, dont stay in contact because he doesnt deserve you!!! What type of guy sleeps with a girl knowing that she probably wnats a relationship and leaves out important info such as he cant be in one or doesnt want to be in one? A guy who is a user!!
You deserve so much more. Find the strength to move on from him.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (11 January 2008):
 What a load of horse-manure. Is it a "Magic" cell phone? Wow! Pulling this on you after sleeping with you and then telling you that you can wait if you want to. He's a real prince among men, isn't he?
I'm sorry, Honey, but I agree with all the other posters here. He is a cad and has left you with nothing but lies after sleeping with you. He deserves nothing but your contempt, and you deserve better than to be with someone who would ever treat you this way.
Chalk it up to him being one of life's mistakes. We all make them, the important thing is to learn from them. Take care.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2008): I often wonder how we ever managed before cell phones were invented! Is he that thick that he can't write - or is he just not that bothered?
I think this is a classic case of hit-and-run. He's had your virginity, and thank you very much ma'am! Goal achieved. Wonder when the next virgin will come along?
I've heard some excuses in my time but this one comes close to taking the biscuit!
And I agree with the others here.
Phil
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A
male
reader, Ponungalungb +, writes (11 January 2008):
 That's a pretty lame excuse - no cell phone. That's a good one. And that's just what it is, an excuse . . . for not committing to you. I'm not trying to be cold, but, he got what he wanted from you and that's probably all he wants from you.
You know what you should do, even though you don't want to. Wave bye bye.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (11 January 2008):
 I don't think you should wait. i know i'm not everybody, or miss perfect, but I don't have a cell phone and I've been in a 2 year relationship fine..does he have ANY kind of phone? In general this is a lame excuse...i mean, by the summer, that's when he's ready to commit, why then, because he's getting a phone then? it doesn't even make sense..if he were interested in committing he'd do it now and not make excuses that are bogus--he'd MAKE time to see you and communicate with you.
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