A
female
age
36-40,
*ku2319
writes:My boyfriend (of a little more than a year) and I recently had a small spat, but it seems to be a culmination of little unhappinesses lately. He says he needs time to think about whether we are compatible. I'm giving him that time, but at the same time I'm worried about what he will decide. I don't believe we are incompatible to the point that it's a problem we can't solve.My question is... how long is enough time for him to think? Usually we talk every day, and even when we're busy we drop each other lines via text.
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female
reader, AskEve  +, writes (14 March 2008):
 Then I feel he still needs this time out to see if he thinks you have enough in common to want to stay with you. If you could try share some of his interests, that would help but in the meantime I would give him the space he's asked for and let him do the contacting. If he continues to contact you day to day then it shows he still wants you in his life. I would give him 2 weeks then I'd ask him if he's come to a decision about the relationship.
~Eve~
A
female
reader, Holz +, writes (14 March 2008):
Hi,
You need to sit down and talk to him your not a dog so dont waste time waiting for him if you dont even know that there is a chance he will want to get back with you. Ask him what hes thinking does he want to be with you or not dont let him make you wait lifes too short. Just tell him to tell ypou straight is the relationship woring or not and does he wan to be with you. I cant tell you what the answer will be but its better for you to know that wait for another month and then find out that its bad news.
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A
female
reader, pku2319 +, writes (14 March 2008):
pku2319 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIt's not so much the feelings between us which he feels are incompatible. It tends to be a lot more on socioeconomic things and the fact that we like to do different things about half the time.
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (14 March 2008):
Give him that time and let HIM chase you! Let him see what it's like to actually miss you. Don't text, call or email him, let that come from him! If he asks why you haven't been in touch then tell him you're just respecting his wishes and giving him the space he asked for. If you continue to contact him first then you'll find he'll reply out of courtesy more than anything else. I'm sure you've done it yourself when someone texts you and you tut and think "I'd better reply" but can really see it far enough? Play it down for a little while and let him come to you. You'll see, if he really IS keen then he'll chase! Good luck.
~Eve~
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A
female
reader, nia +, writes (14 March 2008):
Well first thing is first maybe you guys are compatible in the sense of being together and hanging out but that does not mean he is sure of his own feelings maybe you should give him time so you dont get mixed signals from him and wonder if he is into you or not when he is ready he will let you know and if he does not you have every right to move on.
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