A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 16. I dated(unofficially) this guy (17 y/o) for 3 months - May, June and July. Things were great in the beginning and he had been in previous relationships, but I hadn't. We didn't kiss or do anything like that..I used to hug only, because as it was my first boyfriend and the first guy who truly liked me for me, I was shy and scared and he understood perfectly.However, in July he broke up with me telling me he didn't have feelings for me anymore, and that he really liked someone else.I really really really liked him, I've never liked anyone as much as him. And for the first time a guy actually liked me back. I never would've thought he would like me, but he did.So things didn't work out, he left me because he said that he did like this other girl and they were not official either.. so he was dating both of us which is understandable because in my school alot of people do that so I wasn't surprised. But he moved on and made her his girlfriend. He's in my school in pretty much all of my lessons, he's in my class everyday, so I have to see him everyday and he doesn't talk, acts like he cannot see me or hear me and he just lives his life and I live mine.I literally cry myself to sleep every night because I just cannot get over him.And I'm not able to go out and have fun with friends because I fractured my leg and i'm not able to go out to take my mind off of him.I'm trying to move on, but it's so hard when he's in most of my lessons and I see him everyday, everywhere I go as my school isn't very big.What do I do? It's already been 10weeks since he left me and I can't seem to get over him, my feelings are just not going away, they grow stronger and stronger day by day, even though we don't speak.You may thing I'm young and I have my whole life ahead of me and time to meet other guys, but I'm not the type of person to start meeting new guys to get over someone else.And yes I may be young, but I liked him since January but I never told him or anyone else and then he told me he liked me in May and I was so shocked and so happy because I've never had a guy like me before..And for the first time, the guy I liked, liked me back.I'm just stuck, yesterday I spoke to him and he said to me on MSN ''i never meant to hurt you, i didn't plan to hurt your feelings and i have nothing against you, you haven't done anything and i honestly don't hate you, are you on T-mobile, because if you are, i'll text you''. I'm not on T-mobile, so he couldn't text me, and the next day in school he acted like nothing had happened.Today, he started flirting with a girl i was talking to, he pulled her hair and leaned on her and she started hitting him and chasing him and laughing.Im just extremely stuck! I don't think he likes me anymore. He hasn't said anything to anyone because nobody has asked him if he still likes me, but he knows I stil have feelings for him.He might or he might not. I know that him and his girlfriend are not together anymore because it didn't work out so he is currently single but he is dating anotherrrr girl (unofficially).I wouldn't want to get back with him.. I'm just lost in confusion and I don't know where to go with this.Alot of my friends are saying to confront him and talk to him and get everything off my chest, my close friend that is also close with him told him that I want to speak to him and he said 'Yeah thats fine', but it's so difficult to just go upto him and talk, because everyday he does something unusual to catch my attention and I haven't spoken to him PROPERLY since he left me. I've tried talking to my close friends but theres only so much I can say. They already know about it, I dont want to keep saying the same thing because hes not the only thing I want to talk about constantly. Its been going on for 4 weeks, so i've decided to not go on and on about it with my friends, but I have nobody else to turn to.I hardly get replies on this as well, so please please please if you have ANY advice, let me know!Thanks a ton!
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female
reader, Anonny +, writes (11 October 2008):
Ahh - you remind me of myself a bit! - I'm terrible for really liking people but too scared to show my real emotions ( ie getting physical!!)But like you said time is on your side and one day he will just be a distant memory.I still have very strong feelings for a man who I was gonna meet up with - but didn't - and now I will never see him again - so I can understand your pain of being stuck on him!I suppose for the time being - all we can do is hope...until time lets us forget!
A
female
reader, tayalouise +, writes (8 October 2008):
 I know its very hard when you really like someone, and I feel for you, I really do.
And age means nothing, I'm seventeen and in love so I completely understand.
Like you said he has moved on and you are doing the right thing by trying to as well, so you know whats right really.
Maybe you can text/phone/email him and ask what happened? Make it clear you don't want to get back with him, but were just wondering why hes not really talking to you or anything when you were close with each other before.
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A
female
reader, Faybelline +, writes (8 October 2008):
 What is it, exactly, you like about this guy? From what you've said he doesn't sound that great; he dated another girl while he was dating you, he left you for this other girl, he ignores you pretty much and he knows very well that he has hurt you and that you like him.
He goes through a lot of girls if you ask me, considering you say he's left the girl he was seeing and is dating yet another one now, and, personally, that would put me off.
I think you've got to look at the facts about this guy and realise that he's not all that and, just because he was the first guy you liked to like you back, does not mean that he will be the only one. In fact, you'll probably find that you'll meet someone who likes you for you for more than 2 or 3 months and who doesn't decide to see other girls at the same time.
It's not easy when we want someone we can't have; specially if it's flaunted in our face virtually everyday, but it's something we all go through and it's just a learning curb and, even if it takes you a few more months, you will move on eventually.
Good Luck :)
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