A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been married to my husband for 4 years now. I trust him but his behavior with his cell phone gets me thinking. He guards his phone with his life. Wherever he goes, he takes his phone with him. Should I be concerned? I feel tempted to look through it since he is so mysterious with his phone. What should I do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, marietomates +, writes (4 July 2009):
 You should check it. It sounds sneaky and it is, but he's probably hiding something. Sorry guys, but you know it's true - whether it's porn, texting or calling other women or Lord knows what, it's something. My boyfriend knows I'm the jealous type but I'll randomly pick up his phone and look through it and he doesn't care - because he has nothing to hide. Good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2009): Yes I think you should get a hld of his phone and have a look through it but only if your one of those women that if they find out their partner is cheating will kick his arse out!!! If you are planning on forgiving him if he is cheating then dont bother looking at his phone. Cheaters never change their behaviour just get better at hiding it. If i were you id let my mobile run lat and then ask him if you can send a text from his. If he acts weird, leaves the room with his phone before giving it to you (deleting stuff), or looks over your shoulder while you type the text you have your answer.
I was with a guy like this who used to even take his phone to the toilet and its a CLASSIC SIGN of CHEATING
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2009): you can start by asking him to view the contents of his mail and also ask him why he is so possessive of his toy.
if you do not like his reply or if you still suspect him, by all means CHECK THE CELL. he is obviously hiding something. and don't be fooled into thinking that it is some private business deal he is working on. it is private funny business more like it.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (1 July 2009):
 You don't trust your husband. THAT is why you want to look though his cell phone. Be honest, honey. Nothing wrong with that.
Do you guys get an itemized bill? Pay it over the net? Some cell phone providers will give you an itemized bill so you can see WHAT incoming call and out going calls have been active.
How about asking him? You could be a tad sneaky and ask to borrow his. Or you just be honest.
Now are you prepared for what to do in case you find something you don't like?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2009): People who have nothing to hide, hide nothing.
Ask him to take a look at it, you are his wife, not his girlfriend.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2009): I wouldn't jump to conclusions and think immediately that he's having an affair.
He may well have confidential business that cannot be discussed, or it could well be dodgy business instead.
You need to find out why, and try and discuss, rather than pry.
That's the best advice I can think of.
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A
female
reader, Karlin24 +, writes (1 July 2009):
 You didn't say if this "guarding" of his phone was a recent activity, or if he's been doing it all along. If it's a new behavior, YES, you may have something to worry about. It sounds like he's afraid it will ring and it will be where you can look at it and see who it is. Be suspicious if his phone rings, but he doesn't answer it when you're around. I know that when I was having an affair, I never left my phone out, never kept the ringer on, and didn't even bother to look at it if it vibrated with my boyfriend around (I would check it when I went to the bathroom). If it was me, I would be on that phone the second he was asleep, but he may have passcoded it if he's really worried. Could his actions be innocent? Could he just really like his phone? Sure, but he's acting like I did when I was hiding something. Good luck, let me know how it goes.
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A
female
reader, lovnlife +, writes (1 July 2009):
he guards it cuz hes hiding something prolly a girl calling him and to be honest dont go lokking for what you dont want to find but hes the fool cuz he making his self look supicious
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes, I would let him go through my phone. I have absolutely nothing to hide. He knows who my friends are including guys and should not be amazed by anything in there. On the other hand, we went through this once when we were dating, he had a girls name which I did not recognize and he told me it was one of his girl cousins that lived out of state. Okay so one day me and his mother were talking and I asked about this girl and she did not recognize that name and she said he did not have a cousin in that state with that name.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2009): Well..would you let him look through your cell too? I've always respected my gf's privacy. Only to a certain time when she acted distant or indifferent to me (which were grounds for breaking up anyway) I then invaded her privacy. Which then led to the truth and then led to a very bad breaking up, rather than a "casual" break up. If he is acting strange to you included with his cell ph behavior then maybe you should just confront him about it before resorting to checking his cell.
I had asked first if you would let him go through your cell because I know many women (if not all) do not like it when anyone goes through their things, like cell ph or purse.
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