A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:so this isnt a bf/gf type question but i do need a bit of advice. Has anyone ever been worried about having an unattractive child? It may seem selfish....but i cant believe im the only one who has ever worried. Help please? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 September 2011):
 never worried about the attractiveness of my children. both are attractive.
one is also disabled. i never worried about that either... but I still got it.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (12 September 2011):
 Nope, never worried about that. I did worry about birth defect because I was an "old" mom. I have 3 clever, bright, happy healthy, gorgeous children.
Newborns are notoriously ugly to everyone but the parents LOL
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (12 September 2011):
 It may cross your mind before you have your child. After , any objectivity flies out of the window. Those who have a ugly baby think it's cute, and those who have a cute baby think it's unbelievably beautiful. No exceptions to this upgrade mechanism.
So, in practice, having an ugly kid ... is always something that happens to other people, never to you :)
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female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (12 September 2011):
 I'm assuming this question is asked out of fear that if your child is unattractive they may be treated badly by their peers? If so the answer is yes. Anything that I thought might cause unhappiness in my child was cause for concern in me, just as it is with all parents.
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female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker +, writes (12 September 2011):
 I think it was Pasternak who wrote that every woman gives birth to a prince or a princess, it's just that child that doesn't live up to that...
A lot of women do worry - I know my own mother did (though she got lucky). One thing to recall though is that people's looks change - a pretty baby could grow up ugly, and vice-versa - lifestyle counts, after all. The fact is, once the kid is born, the odds are you will love it no matter what it looks like.
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female
reader, crazylady +, writes (12 September 2011):
Yep! Your not alone.. I get it, obviously your going to love your baby no matter what!!! Your only human to think about that, the only reason why people don't talk about it is because there baby is ugly lol no affense but no body will say there babys ugly unless there honest, but doubt it, or people don't wanna look like there coming across selfish or mean or ignorent for saying that comment. It's just your minds wondering that's all! I'm not prego or have a kid but when I do, I'm so nervous cuz 2 pretty ppl dnt always make a beautiful baby, but as long as there healthy and become good kids that's all that matters, everyone eventualy becomes beautiful from the inside out!
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female
reader, hopeFUL_romantic_13  +, writes (12 September 2011):
P.S. I apoligize for the errors in my post. My labtop is being stupid as per usual.
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female
reader, hopeFUL_romantic_13 +, writes (12 September 2011):
P.S. I apoligize for the errors in my post. My labtop is being stupid as per usual.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2011): I think everyone worries about this and more so about health issues for their children, so it's normal. Parents want their children to have every advantage in life. But most people do love their children in the end. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, once the love bond is there, the rest becomes unimportant.
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female
reader, hopeFUL_romantic_13 +, writes (12 September 2011):
No offense, but how could you ask think that? I know there's a phbia that has to do with deformed children, but that sounds a cruel to me. You should love you're child no matter what. There have been so many poor children out there who are abused and/or abandoned because their parents cannot accept them despite any birth defect. It is so sad how shallow and mean people can be. I am not calling you shallow though. Please do not get mad. I would love my child no amtter what. This is coming from someone who has never received pure love because she is different. I would not wish this feeling upon anyone, especially a child. If you have a child someday, and he/she does not turn out the way you expected or is "unattractive," please do not show that child any disregard or disguist. Children need to be loved and respect like everyone else. It is one thing to be shunned by strangers but to have parents who cannot stand you for no real reason is extremely painful. The child will think to him/herself that they are unlovable and worthless. I am sure you would not enjoy that so please do not do that to someone else, especially when that someone is your own child.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2011): I worry about having a healthy, normal child,one that doesn't have any physical or medical complications... maybe not so much about physical characteristics, but its the same idea. I think its just a normal concern of people wanting their children to have the best of absolutely everything, including appearance.
the good news is you will end up loving your child unconditionaly anyway, try not to worry about it too much!
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female
reader, svf  +, writes (12 September 2011):
 Yes - you are not alone! I find out in 5 weeks if I'm going to have a 'butt-ugly' or a beautiful princess!
I know they say you shouldn't even THINK of such things, but honestly, every mother does. I don't know why, but we do - and to be honest it's always at the back of my mind too. My first daughter (8) is gorgeous, but my due baby has a different dad, so different genes... Don't worry so though, because we ALWAYS love our babies, it's something you just simply CANNOT turn off, motherly love wins every time. And, truth be told, we ALWAYS think our babies are the most beautiful things the universe has ever seen - I think it's to do with hormones!
Don't worry, your baby will be BEAUTIFUL! Now, where was I ... back to thinking... 'butt-ugly' or gorgeous ... x!
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female
reader, person12345 +, writes (12 September 2011):
 I think just about everyone hopes their child will be the smartest, most attractive, most popular, most creative, and most successful person on the planet.
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male
reader, soon567 +, writes (12 September 2011):
You can't help or stop how your mind process thought. I dont think its selfish at all, once you have a child in bond with it, then he/she would always be beautiful to you.
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