A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend is a "musician", or so he tries. I personally can't stand listening to him sing. I just don't have the heart to tell him that. Instead I suffer in silence. We haven't even been dating a year yet, and the noise is beginning to get under my skin. I really can't see myself remaining sane if I have to one day live with someone that sings bad, plays guitar, piano and the drums. I'm a person that really appreciates silence...and it's real unfortunate that we're so different in this respect. Do you think our future is doomed? More importantly, if I can't appreciate and support his musical interest - does this make me a terrible girlfriend? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): You should tell him that he's a great musician with his instruments but that be isn't a good singer
A
male
reader, ivanichiaynus  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 In the UK we have a "talent" contest known as the X-Factor. In the early rounds it is full of people who clearly have zero talent or musicality and I am amazed that not one of them has an honest friend to tell the truth and save the dreadful embarrassment and public humiliation that ensues.
These no-hopers are merely there to make "good" television and give the public a cruel laugh. Do the decent thing and be an honest girlfriend.
Ivan.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 You are not a terrible girlfriend, but you may not be the right person to share a future with him. If music, singing, playing instruments, ( whether he's good at it or bad it's not really relevant ) is more than just a passing fancy for him, but it's a true passion, the chore of his life vision... well, that's a vision you can't share without radically changing yourself for him and being untrue to yourself, which is never a good idea. Or without forcing him to give up for you something that he dearly loves ( an even worse idea ).
Maybe you two,unluckily, are just not compatible.
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A
male
reader, Nithyanala  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 I would not call you a 'terrible girlfriend' by any means, but I would question whether you two are compatible.
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A
female
reader, sexy45  +, writes (3 January 2011):
 I really think u should be honest with him n tell him how u feel about his singing,I don't think being honest makes u a terrible g/f at all,you'r suppose to b agle to be honest with your mate!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): Haha your post reminded me of american idol auditions :p... Id be honest with him gently and tell him why it bothers you and perhaps suggest something else for him like "Hey, I dont think youre good at this, but I think you could try this as I think youd be good because..."
If he's very passionate about his career and thats the one thing that drives him, Id say your relationship wont survive simply cause of that reason. Be honest with him. Heck, I DJ and play trance and make mixes and while a lot of people like my radioshow, I get tons of people that say dont even come near me with that stuff lol. I comply and even if they are mean as one time I was in a club and some woman shouted up at me "Play somethin' normal!" lol...dont be blunt with the guy and rip into him totally try to also suggest an alternative in which u feel his personality might fit. This way he'll see it as you care about him which you do and youre also being honest. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Honest Answer +, writes (3 January 2011):
 I don't think that you are a terrible GF. In fact, I comment for stivking it out for as long as you have. Unless you start embrasing a life of music (as bad as it may be) you future together might not pan out.
I wish you the best of luck,
Jeff
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