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Disturbing boy in my class

Tagged as: Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 September 2010) 15 Answers - (Newest, 22 September 2010)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

There is a guy in my class who iz always rubbing me.!!!!

Rubbing my back legs chest hips butt and trys for my other part also. He trys to put my hand in his pants. He acutualy one stuck his hand down his pants then when I was not paying attention wiped it on my mouth!!

He is really disturbing me and I want to tell someone But he iz well known and popular with students and teachers?? What do I do

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A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (22 September 2010):

dirtball agony auntThen I think you know what you need to do.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

No I don't I find it really sick and nasty and he asks way to many personal questions

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A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (22 September 2010):

dirtball agony auntIt's only a joke if you find it funny. Are you amused by his behavior?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 September 2010):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Then he says I'm joking I'm just kidding it's really confusing

I solve others problems but I can't handle my own

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A male reader, dirtball United States +, writes (15 September 2010):

dirtball agony auntYes, tell somebody. What he is doing is sexual harrassment and is not tolerated in schools. It cannot be ignored. Great strides have been made in the last couple of decades to protect people from behavior like you are experiencing.

File some charges. He needs to know that this won't be tolerated no matter how popular he may be with others. Good luck!

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A female reader, lainey23 United States +, writes (15 September 2010):

lainey23 agony auntThis is not acceptable in any way, shape or form! He is way over the line!! Who cares if he is popular? You're a human being who deserves to be protected. The first thing you need to do, is STAND UP FOR YOURSELF!! This idiot does not get to put his hands on you if you don't want him too! Do whatever you need to do, take self defense classes, tell him NO everytime he does it and try to stay away from him at all costs! Next, tell on him! It doesn't make you a "narc" to inform on someone who is violating you. Talk to the principal, teachers, parents and even HIS parents and the police if need be. Let everyone know how disgusting he is, so maybe he will be shamed into stopping. Just be careful, don't put yourself in more danger. Be smart about it and NEVER be alone with him. Good luck!

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A male reader, C. Grant Canada +, writes (15 September 2010):

C. Grant agony auntMost schools have zero tolerance policies. If you go to the principal, he MUST take action. Do so -- this creep thinks he's untouchable and can do whatever he wants. He needs to learn that that's not so.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (15 September 2010):

Honeypie agony auntWhat a sick bugger. You need to tell your teacher now. It will only escalate. Who knows what he is capable off.

Also talk to your parents, this needs to stop.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (15 September 2010):

Tell someone. He's assaulting you. You need to stop it. Who cares of he's popular. He's a creep.

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A male reader, Cerberus_Raphael Sweden +, writes (15 September 2010):

Cerberus_Raphael agony auntWell you need to tell someone! He is sexually molesting you! Do not let it happen! Tell the teachers, tell your friends, whether or not they believe you, they will start watching him carefully. Stay out of his reach whenever you can. There is no need to avoid him completely but make sure he can't touch you.

I hope that helps.

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A female reader, LustyLisa United States +, writes (15 September 2010):

What he's doing is called sexual harrassment and is a punishable offence in the US. Just because he's popular doensn't give him "rights" to break the law, just makes it harder for people to believe you, especially if he only exhibits this behavior when no one else is around. The more you do nothing about it, the likeliness of it being repeated and progressing into more disturbing behavior increases.

The best thing for you to do is try to remember and list his innapropriate behavior then report him to school officials. Then, calmly tell him that his behavior is unacceptable and that he has been reported. If you haven't already, start keeping a detailed summary of the date, time and location (s) of where the harrassment takes place. If the school doesn't do anything, you need to go a step farther and report him to the police in your area.

If he's just being a childish chump, he'll more than likely stop harrasing you once he sees you'r not putting up with it and move on to someone weaker. However, if he's the abusive and stalking type by nature, he may escalate his harrassment against you in retaliation.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010):

This boy is obviously attracted to you but to immature to approach you correctly. It does not matter his popularity status it is wrong and in the real world outside of school he would be arrested for doing such things. You need to notify somebody of his actions or he will think it is ok to act and treat women this way. The burden of proof will be on you so if you have witnesses or a way to take pics do so. Good luck don't let your fears keep you from doing what's right you have done nothing wrong and nobody deserves to be treated like that.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010):

This person screams 'sexually motivated fiend.'

Get him some help, tell someone who can do something about him. Whatever you do, do not allow him to continue this behaviour, it is disgusting.

PS. He sounds really immature.

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A female reader, fi_the_tree United Kingdom +, writes (15 September 2010):

fi_the_tree agony auntYou need to tell someone about this, it is totally unacceptable for anyone to put their hands down their pants and then wipe their hands on someone else!!!

Ask to speak to the principal in confidence, this way it will be kept private.

You shouldn't have to put up with this boys wandering hands. Does he do this to others aswell?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2010):

This is sexual harassment, he has to learn he cannot do this to females. Tell a teacher, DO NOT ALLOW THIS TO GO ON. You are his target and it could get a hell of a lot worse. Make sure you are never alone with him. Your giving him the view you will ever tell so that's why he keeps doing it. You will not be in your school forever, don't let him get away.

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