A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hey there i don't know what to do i have been with my boyfriend a while now and i lost everything because of him my friends don't want to know me and my family don't want anything to do with me anymore. my boyfriend tells me what to do and what to wear also he don't let me where make up or to leave the house unless he is with me. if i don't do as he says he gets mad with me and hits me. i am scared of him and i dont know what to do. i want to leave him but i dont know how or where i will goplease help me :( Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (3 April 2010):
 Oooo sweetie run away from this man as fast as you can. He is not the kind of person you want to spend your life with. Your parents and family will understand and not hestiate to welcome you back with open arms. Being a parent myself I would imagine they have distanced themselves from you because the can't stand to see the pain you are in.
Please I can't urge you enough to get away as quickly as possible. If need be leave with nothing. Better to be safe with nothing than battered with stuff.
A
female
reader, lonesum dove  +, writes (3 April 2010):
 Hey look you had enough sense to go online to post ur problem, i think you are an intelligent young lady, you have assess to the internet email mom dad anyone to come get you, if you can get out of that house and go to the nearest police station and report that bastard, you are better than that i am sure mom and dad and all ut friends will forgive you for anything that happen in the past
good luck sweety
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A
female
reader, celticghirl +, writes (2 April 2010):
please please get away! run to your family and tell the you need their help if they are all still going to be funny with you then go to the police who will find a refuge because living anywhere is better than having your life controlled by someone.I have just left my bf after 2yrs because of his abuse and its hard but i take one day at a time and after 3wks i already feel better,more calmer and free!! Please listen to me i know exactly how you feel and what it is like to feel like you have no one to turn to but youl be suprised how many ppl will support you.Get out it only gets worse.A soon as you get the chance RUN RUN RUN!! please dont leave it any longer xxx
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A
female
reader, athenas +, writes (2 April 2010):
your in a abusive relationship, you need to get out of that house when he leaves to work because things are going to get worst... I was in the same situation your in and it took me 3 years to get out of that relationship, there is domestic violence wich of course we all know that is not right. he cant control you in that way and he cant be hitting you either. i would go to your parents house and talk to them let them know what he has been doing to you and you need to put your part as well and report this to the cops this way they will have a restriction order that way he wont come near you thats just to keep you safe we dont know what hes capable of... wish you the best best of luck
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (2 April 2010):
 I suggest you make contact with your family and ask them to support you. You are young and it is ok to have made a mistake and admit to it. However your boyfriend is verbally and physically abusing you. There are lots of agencies who can help you including your GP. As you are under 18, social services have a duty of care towards you and I would pick up the phone and make contact with them if you have no family to turn to. You can also ring the womens aid helpline (google will give you the number) or childline (again google) or the nspcc (again google). You should report your boyfriend to the police once you are in a safe place as he may present a danger not only to yourself but other women. His behaviour of excluding you from others is a classic controlling attribute of domestic violence perpetrators. He needs help and the criminal justice system will see that he gets it as judges are more inclined to order perpetrators to attend specialist counselling and classes for anger management/ domestic violence awareness.
The council will also have a duty of care to rehome you if there is evidence of domestic violence. Good luck!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (2 April 2010):
I would go back to your family and say that you've screwed up and need help. You must get away from this guy, whatever it takes. If you have to, sneak out a window and just get away. If that fails, then go to the nearest police station and just ask them for help.
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