A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've posted about this situation before but things keep happening and I am at a loss. So to recap, I met this guy on a dating site and we dated 2 months until he ended it with me. Things were really great at the beginning but about a month into it, he told me that he still wanted to date other people, which really killed the mood for me. Things slowly went downhill after that (because I was insecure) and a few days before breaking up with me, he actually went on a first date and he is now still dating this new girl. After that day he went on this date, I could tell he really wasnt making any efforts to be nice. We saw each other once, had an awful time and that's when I prompted the conversation and he told me we were over. He blamed it all on me, saying that I was too sensitive, causing too much drama. He never acknowledged once that he was responsible for it too. Yet, he wants to stay friends which I'm opposed to. I mean, come on, I was just dumped and I should be happy to be his friend? I don't thing I can flip that switch just like that, especially after how critical he was about me. So anyway, over the last cpl weeks, he kept texting me and iming me on facebook. Which I really didn't see the point and we kept being nasty at each other. And last week, he actually texted me and started talking about sex and that he didnt end that part with me. I didn't really say yes or no but just that we were over. And again today he imed me on FB, we talked a little and he confirmed that he was dating her (which I wanted to know for sure) and I told him that he should go after her ass and not mine. And he responded something nasty like I should go on anti-depressants.Can someone explain why he keeps being an ass to me and yet he keeps contacting me? He wants me to be friendly to him but how could I since I am constantly being attacked? Knowing that he's with this girl now really upsets me but I want to understand what his behavior means.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): He wants a bit on the side. You.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): He see's you as desperate and and easy going. He chose someone else.
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (17 November 2010):
 Just block him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): He is trying to minipulate you into wanting to sleep with him. He wants an ego boost. You should probably tell his GF so she knows how much an idiot is using her
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (17 November 2010):
 He told you why ! "He has not finished the sex part with you ".
Lots of people like the security and the ego stroke of having a sexual spare tyre just in case, and that's what he is after.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (17 November 2010):
He keeps contacting you because he likes the games and likes the drama. However, because you still continue to talk to him, it only leads me to think you like the games and drama as well. I know you would say that you hate it, but it's simple to get rid of him: ignore his texts and delete him on facebook. It's all easy to do...ignore, ignore, ignore, but you don't. I know, easier said than done. Instead of worrying "why" he's doing it, forget about it. Delete him from your life, you only invested 2-months of your life into him (which isn't much), ugly truth is: if he wanted you, he'd be with you. He playing mind games, get rid of him asap.
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A
female
reader, Plexi  +, writes (17 November 2010):
 Hun,
This is how he sees things:
that girls is his chase- he doesn't want to get sex from her because the chase will then be over
he wants sex from you because you are not a chase, in his eyes you his been there done that, want to do that again
if you are ok with being his security blanket and giving him sex while he plays with his other "toys" then continue dating him. if you are not ok with being used then cut the cord and just ignore all ims, calls, emails or texts.
Move on hun and find a guy who treats you with the respect you know you deserve!
HUGS
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (17 November 2010):
 Why do you still keep in contact with him, if he's so nasty and rude to you don't give him the time of day. Block him on FB and ignore his texts. You guys just broke up, and neither can handle a friendship so it's best that you keep it at no contact so you can fully move on. Clearly, he's moved on because he has a new girl. It's time you stopped analyzing his behavior and be done with him.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2010): He's an idiot and I really feel sorry for his girlfriend. Be thankful you're not her. He's probably infested with STD's. Stay away from him. He's toxic.
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A
female
reader, SillyB +, writes (17 November 2010):
 He thinks he can break you down to sleep with him. Guys think that if they chase enough, the girl will give in.
I'd forward his texts/emails to his new girl ;)
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