A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This is one of those times where your stuck trying to analyse everything to figure out what they mean... but it's driving me insane, so I guess I'm looking for opinions to see if any of this is means that this girl likes me or not. I met this girl at my local swim team who goes to a school about 20 miles away, but she lives in my town. I didn't pay much attention to her at first because I wasn't in good shape body-wise, and I was kinda awkward. Fast-track about a year and I'm really more confident, I'm healthy, etc. Now I find myself liking her more, and even feel like I notice her looking me down more, I was leading the warm-up stretches and I could see in my peripherals that she was looking right at me, felt like a stare, now I am aware it could have just been to get the stretch, but I feel like I see her looking at me in the pool too from her lane which is next to mine. Then whenever we play water-polo, we end up guarding each other because she actually has more experience than anyone else, she always ends up dunking me and laughing about it, then I started pulling her under with me and it got even more laughs, by the end of one session we were so out of it we just figured we could hang on too each-others shoulders and wade water together, which got some laughs from her after I made some jokes about the buddy system. Then I ask her to see a horror flick, she says yes.We meet there and I would say it goes well, during the movie I kinda oversell the horror, make jokes, make her laugh, etc. Before the movie, we talk, nice chatter etc. Headed out we're friendly, we talk a little more and we go our separate ways, I get a good feeling from it, but then about five hours later, I figure it'd be a nice thing to just text her and say that I had fun, and we should do it again sometime, threw in a joke to lighten it up, after all, the movie wasn't really dubbed a date by either of us. But since then, I haven't gotten anything back, which makes me freak out wondering if I freaked her out with it or something. I guess at this point I'm asking if I was moving on something possible, or if I'm over analyzing things to make a hopeful situation.
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female
reader, babyparis +, writes (6 February 2012):
 I think you should keep it cool for right now. it seem asthough she likes you :) if you see her at the pool and shes acting strange then something is bothering her but if shes the same then just talk and text as friends and things will happen on its own.
A
female
reader, Dorothy Dix  +, writes (5 February 2012):
Hi there. You seem to get along and have fun together, so there is some rapport, isn't there?
You can make each other laugh also.
So that's something positive.
If you are on the same swim team, you are obviously seeing each other several times a week, so it's not like you are rarely seeing each other, is it?
How about you just keep it relaxed for now, and don't try to move it along too soon. Just let it all happen naturally.
You can't rush these things. And to do so, could destroy it before it had a chance to blossom properly.
As you will be seeing each other a few times a week, every week at the pool, just get to know each other better every time. Whenever you get the chance to talk, then talk - about anything and everything.
Talk about what you both did on the weekend, what you watched on tv last night, books you might be reading, hobbies, that type of stuff.
The idea is you are trying to get to know each other better.
Yes, it's good to be splashing around and dunking each other, but it's not talking is it?
Don't stop having fun.
You at least know you can have fun together and make each other laugh, however you do at some time, need to actually talk about something. Otherwise your friendship stays on a very shallow level.
So the next time you see each other at the pool, say "Hi" etc., and if at the end of your swim team meet, you feel comfortable with her, why don't you ask her out to see another movie?
And if she says yes, let her pick what movie she wants to see. Talk it over in any case, to decide between you. Then organize to go see it together.
You do need to give her choices.
The next time, don't text her after. Just leave it till you see her at the pool again.
No contact in between.
That way she can think about you in your absence.
So what I am really saying here is, don't crowd her space.
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A
male
reader, MajorDisplayerOfInternationalPlayerBehavior +, writes (5 February 2012):
 You're over analyzing. Since you see her regularly, just wait until the next time you two are at swim class and talk to her. Don't have unnecessary expectations. Just enjoy her company, relax, stay confident and be a gentleman.
You will be fine.
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