A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I don't think that I'm being unreasonable that I'm fairly annoyed that my partner, the guy who says he loves me.. has just gone away for a few days away with his ex wife and kids. Staying in a hotel in a family room!Last year I begged him to go away with me this month. As my work makes it difficult to get time off during summer months, so I like to holiday either now or November. He said he would then had a massive turn around saying "it would upset his ex". Sorry but him going off with them upsets me heaps...How can I get him to see things from my point of view?
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male
reader, firstlovelastlove  +, writes (26 February 2011):
 "gone away for a few days away with his ex wife and kids. Staying in a hotel in a family room!" Come on. He's being a jack ass.Sometimes when I read what people post here I have a hard time understanding the quality and quantity of their emotions. You don't "think" you're being "unreasonable"? And "him going off with them upsets me heaps"? That's not how I would've said it but I think I understand what you're trying to communicate. Is there a word people in England use for jack ass? I think what he has done is on the same level as some of the most selfish people I have known. I truly wish you all the best!
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (26 February 2011):
His actions all suggest that he's not really over his ex wife, and that you're basically there for when he wants.
If he'd been serious about you at all, at the very least he would have slept in a separate room.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2011): Personally I don't think it sounds like you have much of a relationship. Time to find a guy who will give you a good time, some commitment and a happy life.
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A
female
reader, SweetSmoochy  +, writes (26 February 2011):
 He may not be over his ex wife. If he married and had children with the woman, one could see how this would be possible. When he comes back, you two need to have a discussion where you bring up this concern calmly and talk it out. I'm thinking this relationship isn't going to work, unfortunately. You should look for someone more unattached than your current man.
I know it's not that easy, and very painful besides, but it will be more painful in the long run dating a man in love with another woman, if that is the case, which is what it sounds like.
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A
female
reader, GeeGee255 +, writes (26 February 2011):
 You know there are many ways one could argue for reasons why it is healthy for a man to spend some time with his ex and children doing family activities as a family. But the fact that he canceled a vacation with you because it would UPSET HIS EX, just says it all. Have you ever heard of the saying you need to take your power back girl? Cause that is what you need to do with this man immediately. It's time for you to crack the whip and tell him like it is. And if he still won't heel then its time for him to hit the hi-way and get out of your life.But you gotta mean it and be prepared to follow through with what you say. Or else things will only get worse for you as this man is treating you like a disposable doormat.My guess is that if you do take you power back he will get in line and start acting like the boyfriend your deserve. And if not well then you don't need a man like that in your life anyways, so good riddance to him. Just don't allow him or any other man to take you apart piece by piece. No man is worth that.
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