A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:my boyfriend of 3years cheated on me for 3monthes with a girl much younger than me and even got her pregnant. i found out recently from the girl her self. i asked him but at first he was denying later on he told me the truth but he says he loves me more than her but he cant leave her because the girl will kill the unborn.i left him, but knowing that he loves me more, its getting hard for me to move on...please help what do i do i?..still love him.
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cheated on me, move on Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Serpico  +, writes (6 September 2012):
You should stay if you want a life of misery by hitching your star to a cheater/loser.
You have just been shown his true colors while you have no official attachment to him. Many people would love to have been in your shoes before they made a huge mistake. To put it a bluntly as I can, you are beyond stupid if you stay with him, and misery he causes you from this day forward is completely your own fault.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (6 September 2012):
 Tell him good luck and good riddance. He can't have you both. That isn't fair on anyone.
Dumb the cheating loser.
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A
female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (5 September 2012):
 It isn't a mistake anymore when it lasted for 3 months. One time, possibly. 3 months of lying? No way in hell. He doesn't love you. He says he does to keep you around. If he loved you he wouldn't have lied to you for 3 months. He wouldn't have wanted to have sex with another girl. He wouldn't be staying with her now, for any reason. He would've told you what happened rather than deny it repeatedly until he couldn't get out of his lie. He absolutely does not love you more than her or at all. He loves sex and himself. Men like this you need to stay away from. He's lying cheating scum and won't ever be any different. Thank god you didn't end up with the baby because he would never be out of your life.
And I must point out to pay attention to what bondgirl said. If you decided to take him back, despite him juggling 2 women at once and cheating and lying to you..., he would have a baby with someone else. She would always be there. You are far, far too young for this baby mama stuff and a man who has cheated on you. You are so lucky you can make a clean getaway. Stop talking to him and move on. Dont listen to the love shit he spews at you because it's just that, shit. Moving on from such a bad guy should be easy.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (5 September 2012):
 Ok let’s assume you are 21.. so you have been with this man who lied to you and cheated on you since you were 18… the girl he cheated on you with is MUCH younger than you so let’s say she’s 16 . she’s pregnant with HIS baby.
HE DENIED IT.
HE LIED TO YOU
HE CHEATED ON YOU
HE DOES NOT LOVE YOU MORE… you know who he loves MORE? HE LOVES HIMSELF MORE THAN ANYTHING….
Why do you love him?
What about this man’s BEHAVIOR do you love?
Make a list of all the WONDERFUL things about him
Then right next to it put a list of all the LOUSY things about him…
Then you can start to heal… he’s a liar and a cheat and a manipulator and a user… how’s that for a start on you list?
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A
female
reader, jinxx  +, writes (5 September 2012):
 Leave him in your past. If he loved you more, you wouldn't be in this situation to begin with. He's made his bed, not let him lay in it.
Like other people have said, you got LUCKY. You could have married him, had children with him, before he pulled this. Luckily, you're now free to find someone more deserving of you and he's free to deal with the fact that he's stuck with a girl who's trapping him. It's what he deserves, anyway.
I'm sorry for the pain he has caused you, but if you go back it's not going to be any better. Learn your lessons from this one and move on. You'll be much better off, I promise.
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A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (5 September 2012):
I forgot to say in my last answer that you deserve much better.
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A
female
reader, deirdre +, writes (5 September 2012):
that is terrible, Im very sorry for anyone who finds themselves in your situation. although your heart is probably telling you to stay, it will be better if you leave him and stay away. this is his mess, not yours. it is bad enough that he cheated on you but he didnt even bother to use a condom in those 3 months. that is disgusting. he could have given you a disease and you should count yourself very lucky that you dont have a kid with this guy therefore you are not attached to him forever in that way.
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A
male
reader, tamperingtampaguy +, writes (5 September 2012):
You are not going to believe this but you are lucky. Think about it. If you got married and worse yet had a family with this scumbag and he impregnated another lady; you would be pretty much in a worse situation, not just emotionally but financially as well. Be strong and you will get through this. Think about this. This POS'es life is already messed forever . Good luck.
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A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (5 September 2012):
 If he loved you he wouldn't have slept with another girl. He would have thought of you when the temptation arose and told the other girl, "I am sorry, but I have a girlfriend I love very much".
I would takes Karlos' advice and leave him. Remember that if you choose to stay, and if he is at all responsible, he will now have a child in his life and will have some sort of permanent relationship with the other girl. They may not be boyfriend/girlfriend, but they will always be the parents of a child and will have to work together/communicate to raise their son or daughter. That will be a constant reminder to you of what he did.
Some people can rise above it all, but since he cheated on you for 3 months, then lied about it, I would leave him. You are still young and have a lot of opportunities left to meet someone who really cares about you and respects you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2012): Ride the waves and move on!
He loves her but he loves you more?
He should have thought about "Loving you more" before he let his trousers get the better or him.
Leave him to lay in the bed he made, maybe he'll learn a lesson from this.
There's no way he can be faithful to you if he doesn't love YOU 100%.
Don't settle for less than you deserve.
Just for the record you're between 18-21, how "much younger" exactly is this other girl? Because if she's under sixteen, he's broken the law anyway and deserves a higher price to pay than just losing you, and having a baby he doesn't even want (From the sound of it!)
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