| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: my boyfriend wants to marry me and i know its not just for sex cuz he wants to marry me later. he is 17 and i =ma 16 can he really have true feelings like that?signed confused- Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 December 2006): Yes i think that he can have tru feelings like that. I am 17 and my boyfriends is also 17 and we have already talked about getting married out of high school./ When you are ready you will know. Don't force love. Youve to be sure that he is the one for you. FOr me i know that he is the one and i am ready just as he is.
A
female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (16 May 2006):
 Only you can know if you are old enough. But if you have to ask to be honest i dont think you are.
...............................
A
female
reader, mystify +, writes (6 April 2006):
 do you mean that he wants to marry you in time but he waqnts to wait till after marriage till sex?
if so of course alot of teenagers have such strong emotions that last , i met got together with my husband on his 17th birthday and i know he is sure of our mariage and he is always the one to pull us through and keep us together through hard times.
although if you have previuosly said to him that you will onlyy have sex when married , stick to it if it is your perogitive, as their is always the smalll chance that he might see agrreing with this as way into gaining your trust to have sex beforehand.
at the end of the day go with what you feel comfortable with.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2006): Anyone can have feelings like that, dear and many young people your age do. It sounds like in his youthful exuberance, he's very much in love with you and is telling you he wants to commit to you in a much deeper way, but---in the future. While this feels good, please keep your wits and sensibilities about you because at your young ages, and fully understand that feelings do flux rapidly and change, as maturity and growth take place. You two may be together a lifetime-you may be together another month. This is very common with teen roamnce.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2006): The very fact that you have asked this question suggests to me that you have your doubts about marrying at your age!
...............................
A
male
reader, Adman +, writes (3 April 2006):
well, that's up to you, do you want to get married when your a teenager? Yes it is a big thing to do and a really big step in your life. What you need to do is think seriously, is this the right guy/girl for you? are you going to be ok in the future i'm afraid it is up to you...Adman
...............................
A
female
reader, Hopeful +, writes (3 April 2006):
 Why the rush into marriage? Why not just enjoy being teenagers and being together. Enjoy your lifestyle before you have to worry about things like mortgages and full time work and gas bills and car repayments etc etc etc.
You are still so young and you don't need a wedding ring to prove your love to each other. I would take the fact that he wants to marry you at some stage as indication of his feelings for you and enjoy the fact that he cares about you and loves you so much. Enjoy spending time together, making plans for the future and getting to know more about each other.
Most people think they might marry their first love, some do, some don't. The best thing to do is to continue to enjoy and work on the relationship so when you are a bit older you can decide if it is right to get married.
The reason that many countries have laws on young people getting married is to protect young people from making mistakes. This is simply because the government and general society don't want to see teenagers acting on the moment when it comes to marriage and not thinking it through.
Marriage is a huge step and it is best done when both partners know each other very well, love and respect each other and have considered all the implications of a life together - money, a home, children etc etc etc.
I would just keep on at your relationship and as time goes on you will know when it is right to get married. There is no harm in waiting for marriage if you are in a relationship where you respect and love each other.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2006): I think that you should wait because you have your whole life in front of you. This girl at my job got married when was 18 and now she is 22 and she has this look of sadness for not living her life before having kids and not being able to do the things in life that she wanted.
...............................
A
female
reader, Danielle934 +, writes (2 April 2006):
 I think it is alright to have feelings of wanting to marry your boyfriend or girlfriend when you are a teenager. My husband and I were barely 18 when we started going out, and soon into the relationship he would always call me his beautiful wife. We both had feelings of wanting to spend the rest of our lives together, but at the same time we knew we were too young to act on it. We are now newlyweds and 21.
Even after being married for a few months, I can already see how much each one of us is changing (in some ways good, others bad). I do think we got married too soon, but we are under circumstances with his job that if we weren’t married we would be forced to have a long distant relationship... and we both soon realized that we loved each other too much to be apart, so a couple of months of being in a long distant relationship he asked me to marry him.
I think it is okay to accept that you too want to spend your lives together, as long as you don’t act out on it for some time. Me and my husband went out for 3 years before getting married (which I don’t think is enough time especially when you’re young). It takes a REALLY STRONG relationship to withstand being married at a young age because people change, and it is hard to know what you will be like in the future, and if this person will suit the person you become.
It is hard to find people to be friends with as well because most of the people who are young aren’t married and want to have fun, and you will find yourself constantly turning down offers to hang out because what they want to do is something that a married person should stay away from. I would strongly advise for you to wait you are at least done with your college years before planning the wedding.
I hope this has given you some insight.
...............................
A
female
reader, chunky_monkey +, writes (2 April 2006):
I think you need to look on the long range of things. Make sure he does too before you jump into anything. Making love is great esppecailly when there is feeling involved but if there isn't there is no point.
...............................
A
female
reader, Angelicc +, writes (2 April 2006):
 many people believe that when your in your teens tht love its what you feel as were too immature and emotions heighten because were going thur puberty. but i dont i personal believe that am in a love in loving relationship. sure we have our problems but we get thur them together just like any other couple. tho we do talk about getting married we know were to young and we prefer to wait.
so think that your feeling could be true but you should wait a few years until you can really support a marriage.
plus i think you have to get your parents permission before you if your under 18 (in america), if your from the uk you can but i do advise it.
...............................
|
