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male
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anonymous
writes:Am I a weirdo/loser if I don't like going to nightclubs every week?I'm 22, going into my final year at uni. I went out last night for someones birthday and my friend had to go back because he was ill so i was the only guy left. I heard what music was on so I thought sod it and got a cab back home.I just hate nightclubs and find them boring since a) The music in the popular ones I hate (usually dance and hip hop) b) the drinks are over expensive c) I'm not fond of dancing in nightclubs and d) most people there that I knew from school who are always there were the ones that were full of crap.However since they are always popular and busy, I wonder if I'm just odd for not liking them. I don't mind going once in a while just not every week because it just gets boring. However because they're seen as the places to be, I wonder if I'm just weird or a loser for not liking them. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (24 August 2010):
Not in the slightest. I'm your age, and I hate nightclubs. I prefer a pub. Bring back the good old days!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2010): Each to their own.
I'm 22 and I hate night clubs!
I can tell you now there are plenty more in their twenties sitting at home watching films with their mates, rather than out in night clubs. Don't judge yourself off what everyone seems to be doing.
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female
reader, maverick494  +, writes (24 August 2010):
"Normal" is a word that has always intrigued me. What defines normal? Who decides what is normal, anyway? In your case apparently the popular people. But what is considered normal for one isn't for the other. Also, just because something is considered "normal" doesn't mean it's desirable.
You obviously don't desire to spend your time in nightclubs. But because a lot of people seem to disagree, you brand yourself as "odd" "weird" and even a loser.
You want to know what a real loser is, in my opinion? Someone who follows the herd, someone with no mind or will of his/her own. Someone who doesn't have the guts to stand up for what he or she believes in. Someone who doesn't dare because he/she is too afraid of being judged by others. Those things, in my opinion, defines a loser. Someone who is sabotaging the game of life for themselves.
I am not going to tell you whether you're "weird" or not. I am going to ask you if it matters. Because as long as you are enjoying yourself and causing no harm to anyone, who gives a rats ass what others think?
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2010): I don't think you are weird or a "loser" for disliking nightclubs. I know several people who feel the same, and I myself have never seen what is so great about them. It's just not my idea of a good time. I don't think there's anything wrong with that, it's just whatever works for you really. Some people like them, some people don't. And you might be surprised, some of those people who claim to love going might also hate it, but feel they should pretend to enjoy it because they are seen as the "places to be". But no, I don't think it is a problem!
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female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (24 August 2010):
 Not at all! I am 23 (albeit female but not far off your age!) and I hate nightclubs, I see no point in them and never enjoy it when I go anymore. I used to love clubbing when I was 17/18, it symbolised freedom I think from my parents and being able to come and go as I pleased.
But now I am a bit older, and have more discerning tastes, nightclubs are just not how I want to spend my time or money! I am always like the old grandma when I go out with my friends, moaning about the price of a drink or it being too loud! As you said, drinks are rubbish and overpriced, music is often crappy pop or R&B (I prefer rock/indie and the occasional bit of jazz!), and they are far too hot and you have to dance!
My idea of a good night out is a meal at a nice restaurant or maybe a few bars (where you can actually get a seat and hear each other speak over the music!). I like to drink decent wine, have a chat with my friends and generally have a nice time. Maybe once every 3 months or so I dont mind going to a club and having a little dance but most of the time I much prefer bars, pubs or restaurants.
So you are not alone! And I know plenty of my friends who feel the same as me, so while clubs are busy it is like you said - they tend to be full of idiots! It is hard when you are a student because the whole culture is focused around drinking, but once you get into the boring world of work (like me) you will find not many people around you like clubs anymore and they are happier having a few quiet drinks.
I guess you are just growing out of that phase whereas your friends are not, it cant be easy being a bit older at uni (I left at 21 and I was fed up of clubs already at that age!) so you will feel more like an outsider when really you are totally normal.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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