A
male
age
30-35,
*evine92
writes:Is this weird? My girlfriend is 3 years older than me. I'm 22 and she's 25. Is that a big difference or no? We have a good relationship and all (sex is great :P) but compared to all of my friends in relationships, the guy is older than the girl. Same thing with my girlfriend's friends, the girl is the younger one. I don't know, I'm feeling odd here. I love her but people have recently been telling me that most relationships that work, the guy is the older one and that women really need an older (not by a lot) and much more mature guy. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, bardia +, writes (12 October 2011):
 So Very Confused, that is hysterical! I'm 12 years older than my boyfriend (36 vs. 24). There's a lot to consider with greater age differences, but we've already discussed them at GREAT length, just to be sure we're on the same page. So, no, devine92, your situation is definately not a problem! :D
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 October 2011):
 oh goodnes the man is supposed to be OLDER? I'm in trouble. my boyfriend is 13 years YOUNGER than I am.
I don't see a problem with a 3 year gap at your age as long as you and your girlfriend are happy it's no one else's business.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (12 October 2011):
 3 years ;is this all the big difference ? That's nearly irrelevant, you are still in the same range so supposedly you have common interests, common experiences, lots of things to talk about.
I say nearly, because still there could be a problem with mutual expecttaions. At 22, you might still just want to party, have fun, enjoy life without too many plans, while she may already be at,or reaching soon, a stage where she is ready for the responsibility of building a future together, raising afamily etc...
But that's very individual, for all we know she could be the party girl and you the serious minded one, so... don't worry about what people say, if ain't broke don't fix it, and if you two get along , enejoy the relationship without
so many " should " about age and roles.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2011): if thats the biggest issue you have in your relationship, then id say your going pretty well. goodluck!
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A
female
reader, Claraw1  +, writes (12 October 2011):
 I am 6 years older than my boyfriend, and it's not a big deal for us. As long as neither of you have a problem with it, it's fine. A lot of people are in relationships where the guy is younger, don't worry about it as long you are both wanting the same thing.
Some people do need a more mature man, but every person is different. My brother's girlfriend is 20 years his junior (he's 54 yrs old), whereas I am with a guy 6 yrs my junior, both relationships work for thepeople in them and that's all that matters at the end of the day.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2011): no it's not a big deal unless either you or your partner have a hangup about it.
I know lots of married couples where the wife is older than the husband. (not by a lot, but by say, 1-5 years older)
While I know a few couples where the husband is 10 or more years older than the wife, I don't know any where the wife is 10 or more years older than the husband.
But where the wife is only 1-5 years older, I know quite a few.
again, it's about compatibility and quality of the relationship, the age difference in and itself doesn't matter unless you or your partner has a hangup about it and makes it into an issue.
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (12 October 2011):
Not always, and I don't think it's that big of a deal...just women tend to mature faster than men. However, my parents were married for 27-years and my dad is 7-years younger than my mom. He was 23 and she was 30 when they met.
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A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (12 October 2011):
 No that is not weird at all. It is true that on average girls will mature before guys which causes the tendencies for guys to date younger girls but that doesn't mean that your relationship won't work. Three years difference is next to nothing. All that matters is that you two are happy together.
I have been on dates with a girl five years older then me and a few years younger, none of which felt weird because I saw the person that they are and not a number.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2011): Some times it is true that women need more mature men, but I don't think you are going to have much trouble with just 3 years, especially when you are both in your early twenties. As long as everything else in the relationship is going well, and you guys both have the same long term goals and similar values, (if you are looking for the realtionship to be a long term one)you should be very happy together. Anyway, my mum is three years older than my dad and they have been together for 31 years.
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